What is a tea made using breast milk called?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hang-me-im-guilty
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
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My wife was wondering what her breast milk tastes like, so she asked the baby. And he told her...

Umami.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/daveberzack
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2017
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Remember the story where a woman assaulted a police officer by spraying her with breast milk?

If I were her attorney, I could get a not-guilty verdict using the First Amendment. She was exercising her freedom of expression.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spotted_Lady
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2018
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Have you heard the George Jones song about the woman with poisonous breast milk?

It goes β€œif drinking don’t kill me, her mammaries will”.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/egb233
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2018
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Get yourself a breast milk facial
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2016
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People who dislike breadfeeding in public are not haters.

They're just tired of breasts being milked for all its worth.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/latinrprince79
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
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My wife loves complaining about how long she spends breast-pumping for our new son.

She’s really milking it for all it’s worth.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KingAdamXVII
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2018
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After my breastfeeding class, my husband spouted off this gem.

Me: "I need to call your insurance about breast pumps... see what they cover."

Husband: "Probably the boob."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mnshaw
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2017
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What do you call it when a guy tries to sneak peeks at a girl's cleavage?

Cleavesdropping.

Shoutout to my wife for dropping this one on me.

Edit: About 6 people have responded with "peek a boob" already. I applaud the effort, but to me that would be better nickname for nip slips.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/marco262
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2016
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I'm a mom, but I love dadjokes. Especially when they involve boobs.

My friend opened the fridge and a bag of pumped breastmilk fell out.

"Oh, sorry!" I said. "The fridge is boobie-trapped!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/busykat
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2014
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My wife just got her breast pump going...

So my wife just got her breast pump all set up. She's got the double suckers rolling, tits out, milk flowing like a minor tributary. And I ASK "ARE YOU PUMPED?!" fucking genius.... She stared silently for like 10 seconds. Then told me to post here.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JeremySTL
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2019
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Containing excitement
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Renegade_Meister
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2016
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What do you get when you make tea with some breast milk?

TTT

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hang-me-im-guilty
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
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