Big Pun.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/actionaddam
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
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I have found a big pun
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zachattack15782
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2019
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My 12yo's first big pun. I'm so proud.
πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2017
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Mods are awake. Upvote this picture of Big Pun anyway.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shantotto11
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2019
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At the end of the physics lecture, I asked my professor, β€œWhat happened before The Big Bang?”

He said, β€œSorry. There is no Time.”

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2021
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Sometimes I use big words I don’t fully understand.

It makes me sound more photosynthesis.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EliteCombatWombat
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2021
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Have you heard about the chicken that got kicked out because it was too big?

It was ostrich sized

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πŸ‘€︎ u/grandadthony
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2021
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I've decided to quit my job as a personal trainer because I'm not big enough or strong enough.

I've just handed in my too weak notice.

πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hobo4lifee
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
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What did the big chimney say to the small chimney

You’re too young to smoke

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nickatier_Carbs
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2021
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big fan go brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

https://preview.redd.it/1gkriwhk5be61.png?width=644&format=png&auto=webp&s=c141fac5d8dc8b81ebcad13ff6e64f1a4b65da78

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Whipped_h8
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
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What is big, green and if it fell out of a tree would kill you?

A snooker table

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RACOON_IN_MY_ASS
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2021
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Big rip-off
πŸ‘︎ 50
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lazystudent99999
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2021
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My German friend is pretty big

You could say he stahl

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ja-das-ist-gut
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2021
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i used to fan or archery thought. then, i had a big accident while on a competition.

i took an arrow in the knee.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/-Jude
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2021
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What’s a football fan’s favorite food for the big game?

Cup of soup or bowl

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NotMetheThree
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2021
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My wife asked if people wearing camo was big when I was in school.

Told her if they did, I didn’t see them.

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2021
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Why do elephants have big ears?

Because Noddy wouldn't pay the ransom

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2021
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I was complaining to my husband that the baby carrots I bought were so so big that I needed to cut them up for our 3 year old.

He said "Maybe next time you should get premie carrots instead."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/warmfuzzy22
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2021
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A kid asked his dad, "what kind of music did you listen to growing up?" The dad said "I was big into Led Zeppelin." The son asked "who?"

"Yeah" the dad replied, "I liked them too."

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
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Why do big-game hunters mount their lions’ heads?

To mount the other end would be a catastrophe.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/friste
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
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I draw my 8s twice as big as any other number

My boss just can't taller eight it

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lordofthstrings
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2021
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I told my friend I was a big fan of Metallica.

He challenged me and asked me to name 3 songs. I told him "I'm sorry. I only know One"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tkl15
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
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Why is Santa’s sack so big?

.....because he only comes once per year.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/awkwardmystic
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2020
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My wife was commenting on one of our cats and its big belly. I said, "I don't get it. She eats protein all day...

...she's on Catkins."
(one of these days my wife's eyes are gonna get stuck in the eye-rolling position)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/iresenteverything
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2021
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If girls with big boobs work at Hooters where do girls with only one leg work?

IHOP

πŸ‘︎ 62
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RICKDOGG424
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2020
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I'm a real big fan of cars. I guess you could say I am..

A MotΓΆrhead.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BestWest45
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2021
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My friend hit it big taking pictures of salmon in human clothes.

He said it was like shooting fish in apparel.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MagicGuy66
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2021
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I wish my family wouldn't make such a big deal over not picking up dropped ice cubes.

It's just water under the fridge.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Snowdoggo
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
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Grizzly bear walks into a bar. Says to the bartender "i'll have a whiskey..................on the rocks, please" bartender asks "whats with the big pause?"

Grizzly looks perplexed and replies "Ive had them all my life"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Carr3iroh
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
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A big cat was spotted winning every race he ran.

He was a cheetah

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πŸ‘€︎ u/holymolybreath
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2020
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I used to be a flat earther. I even set out to sail across the ocean to find the big ice wall.

But eventually I came around.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jradio610
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2021
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"Huh, why are those big cats over there *blue*?"

"Oh, they're just a hyper-lynx."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jorg2
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2021
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What is as big as a hippopotamus but weighs nothing at all?

A hippopotamus's shadow.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cotswoldboy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2021
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Dad, what's that big flat hill over there?

Son that's called a Plateau, it's the highest form of flattery known to man.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FlackJack3t
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
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Did you know the big dipper used to be part of the zodiac?

It was too confusing though. Everyone was like, "what's ursine?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Swanbrother
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2021
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I was in McDonald's and I ask the worker how much for a big mac and fries

She said she didn't know, so I said roughly.

So in a deep voice she said "I DON'T KNOOOOW"

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sentinel_UK
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2021
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A big light switch is a major turn-on
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bismuth482
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2020
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What do you call a big lighter?

A heavier

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
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I was left a package this morning. On the front in big red letters it said, "PLEASE DO NOT BEND"

I thought to myself, how the f**k am I supposed to pick it up?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
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Did you hear why melons have big elaborate weddings?

They cantaloupe.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gc3c
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
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What do you call a big cat that doesn't play by the rules?

A cheetah!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/eat-rainbows
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2020
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When the moon hits your eye, Like a big pizza pie, That's amore.

When an eel bites your hand, And that's not what you planned, That's a moray.

When our habits are strange, And our customs deranged, That's our mores.

When your horse munches straw, And the bales total four, That's some more hay.

When Othello's poor wife Becomes stabbed with a knife, That's a Moor, eh?

When a Japanese knight Uses his sword in a fight, That's Samurai.

When your sheep go to graze In a damp marshy place, That's a moor, eh?

When your boat comes home fine And you tie up her line, That's a moor, eh?

When you ace your last tests Like you did all the rest, That's some more "A"s!

In New Zealand you see An aborigine, That's a Maori.

Alley Oop's homeland has A space gun with pizzazz, That's a Moo Ray.

A comedian ham, With the name Amsterdam, That's a Morey.

When your chocolate graham, Is so full and so crammed, That s'more, eh.

When you've had quite enough, Of this dumb rhyming stuff, That's "No more!", eh?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ComeAbout
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
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[At the therapist] Me: Doc, I have a crippling fear of big, empty spaces.

Therapist: A void?

Me: That’s good advice. Thanks.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2021
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My movie script went through a big change

Now its a trans-script

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAmazingSoSo
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2020
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