Every year at work they make us do a Sexual Harassment training, and I don't see what the big deal is...

Harassment nothing to me.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ‘€︎ u/ChesterDrawls
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2017
🚨︎ report
Is my friend good enough for the big leagues (for puns)?
πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ‘€︎ u/misspygmy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2019
🚨︎ report
When God was handing out brains

I thought he said trains and I missed mine

When he was handing out noses

I thought he said roses so I asked for a big red one

and he gave it me too

When he was handing out willies

I thought he said chillies

So I asked for a small hot one

Please add more below.......................

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ‘€︎ u/Goldygold2
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
🚨︎ report
CJ's teacher wondered why he didn't perform very well in the PEs test.

After all, all he had to do was to follow the damn train!

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ‘€︎ u/Gustavo6046
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
🚨︎ report
I once had a job in a t-shirt factory

I once had a job in a t-shirt factory. Every day, t-shirts would come down the line, and using this big rubber stamp, I’d apply a handful of dots to them, at random, to just given them a general design that wasn’t blank t-shirt. It was soul sucking, but it paid the bills.

However, I kept running into a problem. I wasn’t applying the dots fast enough. It was a mental thing - I’d get hung up on where should I apply the next dot so it doesn’t look bad, etc. But one of the guys who’d been there longer than I had gave me a piece of advice. He told me to cross to my eyes. That way, I could just kinda zone out and hit the t-shirt a few times randomly without paying much attention to where exactly I was applying the dots. It worked like magic.

Well eventually I was getting ready to leave the factory and they had me train my replacement. It only took one day. I left him with one piece of advice. I told him not to get too hung up on the specific details but just to make sure he dotted his tees and crossed his eyes.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ‘€︎ u/CoyoteTheFatal
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2019
🚨︎ report
A dadjoke that made my whole family go "ungghh"

About two weeks ago, my family was heading home from dinner and we came to a train track. We crossed it and my dad goes "That was close, a train just passed through here." None of us could see one so I asked how he knew. He got a big grin on his face and said "It left its tracks!"

I actually enjoyed it.

πŸ‘︎ 72
πŸ‘€︎ u/Pajamajones
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2014
🚨︎ report
A jewelry appraiser's commute

My fiancΓ©e asked the appraiser if he took the train into work and he said "no way, the train takes me. I'd have to eat a whole bunch of Wheaties before I could haul something that big."

He also had three daughters. A diamond dad joke.

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ‘€︎ u/Colinmacus
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2015
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.