I was hoping some anti-lockdown subs would appear in Popular...

... but they've all been quarantined.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MaenHoffiCoffi
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2020
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Standing at the park today wondering why does a frisbee appears larger the closer it gets..

And then it hit me! I didn't see that one coming

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MainScientist6
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2020
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Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
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πŸ‘€︎ u/StoppingMusic21
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
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You know, it seems like every time I kill a gnat, another one appears.

So, I guess you could say they're appearing at the drop of a gnat.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Falloutchief101
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2020
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it appears so
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πŸ‘€︎ u/qNanyo
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2019
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What page does this appear on?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/orlanthi
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2020
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Every time I get turned on a dvd appears in my underwear

Turns out I have erectile disc function

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hgliluetlardb
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2020
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Energizer has to appear before court

They were convicted for a case of battery

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Grimbelfix
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2020
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What kind of birds only appear on Friday the 13th?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VoicelessSock
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2019
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I opened a book and counted the average value of how many times the letters A to M appear in each page of the book. After getting the results, I threw them away.

They are only means to an N.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sodrohu
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2019
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I appear to be incatpacitated.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Otto-Erotic
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2019
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I knew it was a mistake to take my friend who failed to appear in court out on my leaky sailboat.

As soon as it started leaking, he skipped bail.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2019
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A woman appears in court, accused of attacking her husband with guitars..

The judge asks, β€œFirst offender?” β€œNo,” she replies, β€œFirst, a Gibson. Second, a Fender.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Llovely7
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2019
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A bell gets hired to make a film, in which part does it appear?

In the en...ding

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πŸ‘€︎ u/riccardo_00
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2018
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Breaking News: A turtleneck seller is to appear in court for selling his turtlenecks to the public, and just killing so many turtles. And sweater or not he wins, he was really a bad salesman.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BitGouda
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2019
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I've invented a game where avocados appear randomly and you have to smash as many as possible within the time limit

I'm calling it Guac-a-Mole

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sup3rjaw
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2019
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How did the magician make a candy bar appear out of thin air?

He had a lot of Twix up his sleeve

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lancex
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2015
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It appears that I have an on-again, off-again relationship with clothing
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πŸ‘€︎ u/UriahPeabody
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2019
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Doing a Yoda workout is much more difficult than it appears.

Talking backwards is easy, but finding a Jedi that will carry you through a swamp is damn near impossible.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CMMIV
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2019
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I’ve always wondered why frisbees appear bigger as they get closer...

Then it hit me

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shippy10_
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2018
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Doctor: It appears that your DNA is backward.

Patient: And?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ENJOYblet
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2018
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I dislike most 70’s female solo artists because they appear vain.

They are a bunch of pre Madonnas.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2018
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What food goes best with an arcade game in which you hit toy moles, which appear at random, back into their holes?

Guac-a-mole

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PostAbouts
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2019
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My magician friend’s signature trick is to make cute kittens appear out of thin air.

His stage name is The Wizard of Awwws.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2018
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God appears before Moses and tells him he's going to lead His people into the promise land...

Moses says, "NO WAY!" But God said, "YAHWEH!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheDictator26
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2018
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What do you call a sore that appears in different places on your skin?

A roamin' lesion

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Derptron5K
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2018
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[Meta] When I post a joke in here, how do I format the punchline so it doesn't appear until you click it?

Basically, how do I avoid spoiling the joke? Do I have to put some kind of page break before I type the answer?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shamrock5
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2018
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Appear...
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sydseites
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2013
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Archeologists in Egypt have uncovered the tomb of a mummy that appears to be covered in chocolate and hazelnuts

It's beleived to be the long lost Pharoah Rocher.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/philbertagain
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2017
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It appears we have been replaced. (x/post r/ofcoursethatsathing) pungenerator.org
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tenshortdays
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2016
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How do berries appear?

They come out of the blue.

Ba dum tiss.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mcklauster
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2017
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To the tiny organisms upon which the blue whale feeds, the whale appears to be a stone cold kriller.

No, that's it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bigoldgeek
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2015
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Talking to my brother at dinner, when a wild dad appears!

Brother: If Chelsea had to play versus Man. City in a playoff, I'd buy a ticket instead of saving for a car (soccer teams)

Me: Those tickets would be like.. Β£70 a piece

Dad: Man, that's a heavy ticket

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NBKEEP
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2015
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So as I'm getting a drink from the fridge while enjoying a football game with my family, a wild Dad Joke appears...

football commentator says something about a player's NFL debut being today just before I get crushed ice from the in-door ice maker from the fridge

Dad: "Wait I missed that, WHOSE debut is it today? What was his name again? I couldn't hear!" Me, loudly: "Hang on!" points to fridge "Ice maker." Dad: "WOW his name is Ice Maker?! No wonder he's so tough!"

Now, my dad doesn't often do this so I kinda started at him before slowly saying, "No.....his....it's not...." Then he grinned at me as I felt dumb.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gotkrypto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2014
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The best Dad Joke ever appears in the 'Follow That Taxi' AskReddit thread...

http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/2k4l1v/taxi_drivers_of_reddit_have_you_ever_had_to/clhzwbw?context=1

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tf2fan
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2014
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A wild dad appears...

Visiting family in Wisconsin, my mom mentioned taking a trip to DeForest.

I asked, "what's in DeForest?"

In walked dad. Gleefully, "DeTrees!" without skipping a beat.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/smedes
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2013
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I was wondering, why does a Frisbee appear larger the closer it gets?

Then it hit me

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πŸ‘€︎ u/studentadvisor101
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2020
🚨︎ report
How did the magician make a candy bar appear out of thin air?

He had twix up his sleeve

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hunteraln
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2015
🚨︎ report

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