Reflecting on Prince Philip death, I was chatting with the Mrs and I said, I know I’m getting a little older, but I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug.
She got up, unplugged my laptop and threw out my beer….
EDIT: Thanks for the kind awards... My first ever! ❤️
What happens when a painter gets cold?
He/she puts on another coat.
The trees around the house are starting to bud. I said to my wife, "Honey, do you know what happens when the trees leaf out?"
A look of hopeful curiosity washed over her as she fell into my trap. "No, what?"
"Very SHADY things."
It must've reminded her that she had something else to do that was very important.
What happens when a meteorologist get angry?
What happens if you miss the toilet while trying to take a pee?
Baby Roach: “Papa, what happens if the humans spray us with Raid?”
Papa Roach: “Suffocation. No breathing.”
What happens when you fight a dinosaur?
What happens when a frog parks illegally?
What would happen if the USA switched from Pounds to Kilograms?
There would be mass confusion
What happens when a frogs car breaks down?
What happens when you accidentally drop you Viagra on your clock?
Your gonna have a hard time...
What happens when you go to the bathroom in France?
What happens when you put your hand in a blender ?
My 9 year old told me this: What happens if you party to hard on May the Fourth?
>! Revenge of the Fifth!<
What happens when you mix alcohol and literature?
What happens when the CIA go to sleep?
What happens when a commander walks into a bar?
He orders everyone around.
What happens when a Hogwarts student runs a marathon then trips and hits their head...
What happens when you go the bathroom in Europe?
I’ve decided to open a museum dedicated to bracelets that happen to be magnetic.
Hopefully it will be a big two-wrist attraction.
If the end of the world happens, I want it to be hailing taxis.
what happens when a dad joke is too dark and edgy for this subreddit!
I just saw an announcement on TV. Seems there’s a fortune teller that happens to be a dwarf, wanted by the FBI
To sum it up, there’s a small medium at large.
What’s the worst thing that’ll happen to the Gaetz household if he gets busted?
His son will end up an empty Nestor.
What happens when you try to kick a volcano?
What happens to someone who farts in church?
They have to sit in their own pew.
What happens when Bigfoot learns how to play an instrument?
What happens when you die and come back as a cowboy?
So I had a classmate in chemistry ask what would happen if we were to use gamma rays to cook food, so I said...
It would give a whole new meaning to nuking your food
I have created living numbers! In fact, one of them is psychic and told me that certain things will continue to happen for a long time.
At least for the four-seeable future.
What happens if a polar bear sits too long on the ice?
What happens when you're alone and freezing ?
79% of accidents happens at home.
Finally, great news for the homeless.
What happens when you run a magical lamp underwater?
What happens when you have a bladder infection?
What happens when you take a photo of a car with a single wheel?
Nothing happens, You don't take a photo of anything with a wheel, you use a camera/mobile phone instead.
What happens when the sun goes out in Bangladesh?
What happens when a giovanna runs out of breathe?
They become golden winded
Did you hear about the crow where everytime it makes a noise sornething big happens?
It has a caws and effect relationship
What happens to Werewolf's house when its the full moon?
It becomes a warehouse.
Credit to Haldzur, the newest dad in our party.
Closely watch what happens
What did the friend say after his brother asked what will happen after he gets his glasses?
What happens to you if you pee on the floor?
What happens if you put your hand in the blender?
What happens when frogs park illegally?
What happens when you put your hand in a blender?
What happens when a frog’s car breaks down?
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