Doctors are calling it Stalk Home syndrome.
69%
Race-ism
The camp goers are pretty intense.
My wife says it's nonsense.
I finally battled my Damons.
I keep getting ab-duct-taped by aliens.
I need Help!
A Perpetual Notion
...the one thing I actually look forward to when we go to Hobby Lobby is the moment we're walking through the store, I try to keep a perfectly straight face and act like I have a genuine interest in something on the shelf, I reach up and I say something like, "Oh, look at this nice little Stool sample!"
(Not really a joke, but a true dad joke recurring scenario of mine)
... where this dentist visits me and reminds me that the proper toothbrush strokes involve "spinning right round, right round then you go down"
Fluo Rida
I only got to see my grandpa on my mom's side about once a year usually growing up, but there was always one common factor of each visit.
At some point during the catching up conversations, Pa (what we called him) would get a real dejected look on his face. Then he'd face my mom:
"Oh Vicky... guess who died?"-Pa
"Oh no... Who?"-Mom
"Elvis." -Pa
He'd then giggle, finger fun, and slap his thigh. Every. Single. Year.
I have a feeling he used that one for the better part of 40 years.
On the news a few weeks ago there was a car that had been crashed into by two busses simultaneously.
Dad: I guess you could say that car was
Dad: ....
Dad: Bussed
It was a real recurring night mare.
“Doctor, I keep having these alternating, recurring dreams. First I’m a teepee; then I’m a wigwam; then I’m a teepee; then I’m a wigwam. It’s driving me crazy. What’s wrong with me?”
The doctor replied, “It’s very simple. You’re two tents.”
She said, “Finally! You are battling your Damons.”
