My daughter: it's not healthy to have that much whip cream

Me: just trying to get whipped into shape.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2019
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I invested all my money in a whipped cream factory.

People told me not to. They said that it's a huge whisk.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thegreger
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2020
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What do you call someone with fruit in one ear and whipped cream in the other?

...A trifle deaf

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Carrocko
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2019
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What do you call a gun with whipped cream on it?

A dessert eagle

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrCamie
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2019
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Once a man assaulted me with milk, cheese and butter

How dairy

πŸ‘︎ 70
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2020
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I grew up in a rough neighbourhood. Kids would jump out and put whipped cream, glacΓ© cherries and chocolate sprinkles on people all the time.

I lived in the gateau.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlRedux
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2019
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When is a chef bad?

When he beats the eggs πŸ₯š and whips the cream.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Irishlamb
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
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Cooking always puts my wife in a bad mood...

She beats the eggs and whips the cream.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shdchko
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2020
🚨︎ report
When are Cooks mean?

When they beat the eggs and whip the cream.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shdchko
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2020
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I heard that Rick Astley will lend you any title from his collection of Pixar movies except one

He's never gonna give you "Up"

Courtesy of my dad, of course

πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/adambuccowich
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2016
🚨︎ report
What would Jesus eat?

Probably angel food cake.

No deviled eggs.

Miracle whip on all his sandwiches.

Thomas's English muffins? Doubt it.

Hearts of palm on ice cream (a palm sundae).

Keep it going!

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/reddit4nag
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2019
🚨︎ report
my sister bought my dad a wok for christmas...

he responded with, "I already wok all over the place."

I'm 31 and my dad is 66 (sister is 28). This will never get old. Please, always cherish the moments you have with your father.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pbandjlo
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2016
🚨︎ report
NEW!! Celebrity Fun in the Pun candle line!

Chris Pine - Pine scented

Cocoa Chanel - Hot cocoa scented

Beth Crow-ley - Rain, nighttime, and city streets scented

Tom Holly-and - Holly berry scented

JK Row-ling - Lakes and campfire scented

Miley Cypress - Cypress scented

Bob Moss - Forest and moss scented

Juniper Aniston - Juniper scented

Katy Berry - Mixed berry scented

Britney Spearmint - Spearmint scented

Bread Pitt - Bread scented

Tom Cruise - Ocean, salty, alcohol scented

Aurora - Nighttime, wind, whimsical scented

Nicole Kidman - baby powder scented

Justin Beaver - Wood, nature scented

Elvis Parsley - Parsley scented

Steve Cobs - Corn on the cob scented

Banana Montana - Banana scented

Orange Winfrey - Orange scented

Chris Bat - Nighttime, caves, and bats scented

Zoey Salad-ana - Salad, lettuce, leafy greens, tomato, cheese scented

Dwayne the Rock - Mountains, earthy, fresh, crisp, wind scented Jennifer Joe-pez - Nice hot cup o’ joe scented

Chicken Corbin Blue - Chicken and cheese and ham scented

Robert Brownie Jr. - Brownie scented

Sardine-a Gomez - Sardine scented

Daniel Rad-Clif - Clif bar blueberry flavor scented

Leonardo Di-Carp-rio - Fish scented

Halle Berry - Mixed scented

Demi Tomato - Tomato scented

Kevin Bacon - Bacon scented

Mandy S’more - S’mores scented

Mackerel-more - Fish scented

Broccoli Obama - Broccoli scented

WILL.I.SPAM. - Spam scented

Mark Buffalo Wings - Buffalo wing scented

John Lemon - Lemon scented

Shakiramisu - Tiramisu scented

Egg Sheeran - Eggs scented

Benedict Cucumber Patch - Cucumber scented

Adille - Dill scented

Kevin Spicy - Taco scented

Channing Potatum - Potato scented

Melon DeGeneres - Melon scented

Danny Burrito - Burrito scented

Michaelanjello - Red jello scented

Harry Panini - Panini scented

Snoop Hot Dog - Hot dog scented

Paris Hilton - Paris, city of love, generic love perfume scented

Morgan Whipped Cream-in - Whipped cream scented

Mike Fryson - French fry scented

Henry David Thoreaut Lozenge - Cough drop scented

Raisin Williams - Raisin scented

Robert Frosty - Vanilla ice cream scented

Jeff Onion-blum - Onion ring scented

Tom Skittle-ston - Skittles scented

Ralph Waldo M&Mson - Chocolate scented

Malt Whitman - Malt scented

(Friend and I came up with these on the ride down to Boston for a concert, after the β€œI wonder what Chris Pine smells like?” joke was brought up again from a previous time hanging out. I’m particularly proud of Bob Moss and Zoey Salad-ana.)

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Minnara
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Dad Joked by my Shift Lead at Starbucks...

I was making whipped creams tonight. Since we make our own, we have these little CO2 cartridges that we use to β€œcharge" the whipped cream. These are conveniently called chargers.

I was looking for these charges, even I asked my shift, β€œWhere'd we put the freaking chargers?!" To which he replies, β€œIn a San Diego."

For context, the Chargers are an American football team located in San Diego, California.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thewordofrain
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2014
🚨︎ report
Dad joked at Starbucks. Again!

Back again, with my coworkers and their terrible jokes!

I was in the back room, making whipped cream when I realized I had neglected to get the whipped cream chargers (similarly to my previous post).

I turned to a coworker and asked, β€œHey, Nicole. If you feel like it, could you grab the whip chargers from up front next time you go out there?"

She responded, β€œSure. But could you do me a favor real quick?"

β€œOK...?"

She holds out her arm, β€œFeel my arm for me?" I felt her arm questioningly. She then asks, β€œDO I FEEL LIKE IT?"

And the Starbucks dad jokes continue...

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thewordofrain
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2014
🚨︎ report
Dad's favorite dessert.

Mom: What would you like for dessert? Dad: I would like some 3.14 with whipped cream!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JackieMidnight18
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2013
🚨︎ report
When are Cooks mean

When they beat the eggs and whip cream.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/shdchko
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Why was the chef mean?

He beat the eggs and whipped the cream

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CasualBubbles
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2018
🚨︎ report

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