Whenever I play sports, I want as many Canadians as possible on my team.

They always bring their 'eh' game.

👍︎ 55
💬︎
📅︎ May 25 2018
🚨︎ report
There was some controversy in the sports world this week, when they allowed some athletes to try out for the Olympic gymnastics team more than once

I thought it was just revaulting

👍︎ 12
💬︎
👤︎ u/The_Possum
📅︎ Sep 30 2017
🚨︎ report
I love the camaraderie of team sports.

The players are always working towards one, common goal.

👍︎ 3
💬︎
📅︎ Apr 26 2018
🚨︎ report
What sports team did the train conductors join?

The track team. I'll see myself out

👍︎ 9
💬︎
👤︎ u/Dellell
📅︎ Feb 14 2017
🚨︎ report
An English sports team recently played a foreign team called Real Sociedad ...

Me: "Where even is Sociedad?" Dad: "I don't know son, I've never been to Socie" He was like http://i.imgur.com/EAf5il.png and I was like http://i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/312/563/05d.jpg and my mum was like http://media0.giphy.com/media/Rhhr8D5mKSX7O/giphy.gif

👍︎ 32
💬︎
👤︎ u/marl0we
📅︎ Dec 03 2013
🚨︎ report
My son's new soccer team name is Cheetahs. At dinner I said that was the worst sports team name ever.

My wife asked why and I said "Because, Cheetahs never win..."

👍︎ 2
💬︎
👤︎ u/steve626
📅︎ Mar 20 2016
🚨︎ report
A Catholic High School had a legendary American football program

Every year, the team was in the state championship game, and usually won it handily. Every able lad within a few hundred miles wanted to play football for Central Catholic Fighting Knights.

Those who were familiar with the program, knew that the true heart and soul of the Knights football program was Sister Mary Margaret, an aged nun who would, in full habit, get out on the practice field and work on routes with the receivers, give pointers to the quarterbacks on their stances and releases, but most of all, love them like the second mother that she became to all of the boys in that program.

One year, on the eve of the state championship game, some evil malefactors broke into the convent and kidnapped Sister Mary Margaret. Everyone was stunned by the news, but none more so than the Knights of Central Catholic. They were devastated at the loss of their mentor.

As you might guess, the state championship game didn't go very well. For the first time in the history of the football program, the Knights were shut out. The Spartans beat them 42-0.

The next day, the headline on the local sports section read:

No Offense, Nun Taken

👍︎ 6
💬︎
📅︎ Jun 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Wife got a key cut at the hardware store today.

Wife: I got the hello kitty design on the key because they only had sports teams or plain ones

Me: you don't like aviation?

Wife: (5 second pause then groan and eyeroll)

👍︎ 5
💬︎
👤︎ u/Storjie
📅︎ Nov 12 2017
🚨︎ report
My dad has pulled this on me for 21 years and counting.

(We are watching sports or he flips the tv to a sporting game)

Me: Hey Dad who's winning?

Dad: Team with the most points (huehuehuehue)

Me: (sigh) yeah, nice Dad. Who has the most points then?

Dad: The team that's winning. (Huehuehuehue)

Me: forget it.

Love you pops.

👍︎ 131
💬︎
👤︎ u/UM4DBRO
📅︎ Aug 30 2013
🚨︎ report
Dad got us good with this one.

My brother and sister constantly prattle on about the legitimacy of golf and dance as sports and were going at it again this morning.

"What's the point of having a golf team at the school? It's not a real sport."

"At least there is a golf team. I don't see any dance teams here."

"There's a chess team. Are you saying that chess is a sport?"

"It's not a chess team, it's a chess club. The school doesn't have any golf clubs.'

Suddenly Dad chimes in. "Then what do they use to hit the balls?"

👍︎ 12
💬︎
📅︎ Apr 17 2014
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.