A man walks in to a bar. On the bar is a duck tap dancing on a biscuit tin.

He is amazed and wants to buy the duck. The man refuses at first but eventually agreed. As the man walks out of the bar the now owner of the duck shouts. Excuse me how do i stop the duck tap dancing. Simple says the man lift up the tin and blow out the candle......

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tiger7971
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2020
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Did you hear about the man who was tap dancing?

He broke his ankle when he fell into the sink.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/drivecrux
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2020
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A tap dancing career is one L away from a lap dancing career...
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πŸ‘€︎ u/spruitt1
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2018
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What do you call tap dancing with subtitles?

Dubstep

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2017
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Tap dancing, as an art form, never really spoke to me...

...until I learned Morse code.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mrthatsthat
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2018
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I tried tap dancing

But I had to give it up as I kept falling into the sink.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/highlandnilo
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2016
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The bartender does a little jig whenever he opens a new keg.

It's a tap dance.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2020
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Note: the Warsaw Ballet doesn't appreciate being referred to as "Pole dancers."
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RonPalancik
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2018
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Puns of Varying Quality on the Subject of Linguistics (created in a fit of procrastinative inspiration) some of which I thought someone, someday might appreciate.

Note: Quality Very Varying (I see what I did there) and sometimes subject to specialist knowledge. So I apologise in advance. Shame me with your better puns.

While I was languishing in the Language Centre, doing some semantics antics and considering how all the other linguistics students despised and derided me, I was accosted by a stout man with large glasses who made me a preposition. It was that I should collect terrible puns, to do with linguistics, in order to ingratiate myself yet further with the other linguistics students (including even the phonetics fanatics).

I'm struggling to think of a pun to do with grammaticality that both makes sense and "Is grandma tickly?" correct. I'm also stuck on 'morphologician'. (I'm not actually sure that's a particularly logical word for the subject, though I guess that's more for, er, more for a logician to worry about.)

The problem I have with writing about phonological variation is that one is constantly forced to choose between being fun or logical - very Asian!I always get in trouble with electricians, they think I'm calling them a 'dialectician' whereas in fact I'm just saying "Die, electrician."

I like pscycholinguistics – the only department of linguistics where it’s acceptable to wear a cycle helmet. My Australian accent is terrible but I like to think my Sath Efrican one is predicate. My favourite accent is Received Pronunciation, because it is the accent chiefly used by invisible Japanese people who are ordered online. When the first recipient of an invisible Japanese person got the parcel, they wrote a complaint saying "Received but can't see Asian" and the name stuck.

Why did the speakers whose native languages weren't English, but whose only shared language was English, but they weren't very good at it and kept on having to stop to think about it, stop talking to one another? They came to an agreement. (Get it? If not, write your answer on a pastecard and paste it to the below address.)

What did the 'a' say to the 'the'? "You definitely are ticklish, 'the'!"

Why was the small man eaten by the large bear, which was proportionately bigger than him? It had, er, relative claws.

I think the reason there are so many speakers of Russian is because they all partake in an activity called "copulae shun". (Ok, ok, I know, that was Pushkin it.)

I know a man called Hillary who can, might, should, did, must, shall and will ride an ox. We call him "Ox Hillary".

I always think the verb 'to be' in the senten

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kieuk
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2011
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Did you hear about the man who was tap dancing?

He broke his ankle when he fell into the sink.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nerdgasm12
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2019
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Tried to learn to tap dance

But I kept falling in the sink

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πŸ‘€︎ u/No_Hit_Box
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2018
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