You know why Amish SUVs get such bad mileage?

Because they’re real grass-guzzlers.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RAClef
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2020
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We had a car that was Front Wheel Drive and a truck that was Rear Wheel Drive, but we traded them both for on SUV

And now it's All We'll Drive!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dirge-kismet
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2020
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When I park my Ford SUV in my garage...

I call it my Escape room.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/beaver74
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2020
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In the race to make the best SUV

In my opinion, Toyota has the 4Runner

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πŸ‘€︎ u/4_Teh-Lulz
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2020
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What big SUV likes to sleep around?

A tahoe.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HECThor_DLC
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2019
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When my friend from New York City drove to Nebraska in his Honda SUV, he went for a walk in the countryside...

He was out of his Element.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/norrisrw
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2019
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I used to own a Ford subcompact, but it was stolen. So I bought a Honda SUV.

I’ve lost Focus and I’m completely out of my Element.

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2018
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Looks like this SUV broke the sound barrier

http://i.imgur.com/5CwKLyo.jpg

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mc_88
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2017
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Why was the SUV scared of the convertible?

Because it was roofless

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rogerdude889
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2014
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Car seats arrived for the twins. I had my wife convinced she ordered the wrong type since we drive an SUV.

She ordered Graco "convertible" car sets

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LeatherDan
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2014
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Just got my wife at the Target

So I just had surgery and one of my restrictions is that I can't lift anything heavier than 20 lbs. Was at the Target today with the wife to return a lamp that she had purchased but then decided she didn't like. She parked the SUV and I opened the back to carry the lamp on the store. She said "What are you doing? You aren't supposed to lift anything!" I replied, "But it's light!"

Got the triple whammy. The groan, eye roll, and disgusted walk away from me and into the store. Had to carry the lamp, but it was worth it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Charles_Foxtrot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2015
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They've Gone Rogue!

Said this just now to my wife as she'd been saying this SUV is driving crazy next to us, they passed us and it was a black Nissan Rogue.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/QSquared
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2017
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Medical Care for Owls

We were driving on a highway at night when a large bird flew out of nowhere and struck the top of our SUV with a thud! I told the kids it looked like an owl.

The next day they were asking if the owl was okay?? Not wanting to alarm them that the most likely outcome was the bird's unfortunate demise, I told them the owl just had to see his doctor, ya know, Dr Who. Only my wife laughed of course.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dystopian13
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2017
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I realized I was late to my kid's soccer game. [OC]

I was running late to my kid's soccer game, so I started to jog. Then I borrowed my brother's bicycle, but I still wasn't going fast enough. So I smashed the window of a fancy SUV, hot-wired it, and slammed down on the gas pedal. Well, that Escaladed quickly.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/captainwalnut
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2017
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Out-dad joked my dad about car names the other day

My parents were visiting me, and my mom's been looking at a new vehicle, specifically a Toyota Rav4. As she's not the most tech-savvy, she got one of the paper brochures from the dealership about the features available.

Being marketing literature for a small SUV, there were plenty of pictures of people running, hiking, and being active. My dad looks at it and goes: "so is this the Toyota for runners?" I immediately said "No, that's probably the Toyota 4runner".

My mom cracked up. My dad just groaned.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tullyswimmer
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2016
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Why was the buffalo crying when he said "bison"?

Because his calf was getting loaded in an SUV

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SparkyDogPants
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2016
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