Honda is oldest car make in the world. It was mentioned in the bible!
"And the apostles were all in Accord"
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︎ May 29 2021
As a patriot, I have decided to buy my next Honda directly from Japan and pay the necessary tariffs.
It will...be my Civic duty.
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︎ Apr 11 2021
I recently bought a used Honda subcompact car.
It seemed like a good Fit.
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︎ Apr 30 2021
I heard Honda came out with a new car for pirates...
Itβs the Civic Type ARR!
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︎ Apr 23 2021
A girl invited me to have sex on her Honda Civic
But i like to have sex on my own Accord
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︎ Feb 17 2021
My Honda Civic was banned from the drive-in movies
They say it contains a huge spoiler.
I made that up on the spot and told it to my kid. He told me it's not funny and it's a horrible joke. π
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︎ Oct 18 2020
Conversation regarding YouTuber Therapist "Dr Honda" I had with my girlfriend
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︎ Dec 03 2020
My girlfriend brought up a YouTuber therapist named Dr. Honda...
What follows is a transcription of our conversation
Me: I hope he helps his patients find Accord in their lives
Her: Well therapy is only one Element to success
Me: He's just doing his Civic duty
Her: He gives them Clarity and Insight
Me: On their Odyssey through life
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︎ Dec 03 2020
They caught me selling knockoff paintings from the back of my Honda Odyssey, so they impounded my car.
It was really sad to see my Van Gogh.
BONUS-
I head back to the Honda dealership to purchase a truck, but instead I Tacoma Toyota.
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︎ Jul 19 2020
I also knew someonewho felt morally obligated to drive an economy sized Honda
She felt it was her Civic duty
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︎ Mar 02 2020
The CEO of Honda was fired yesterday, and had to be physically removed from his office
He didnβt want to leave on his own Accord.
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︎ Jun 08 2019
The CEO of Honda was fired, and the cops were called to remove him from his office.
He refused to leave on his own Accord.
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︎ May 20 2019
My son and I both have Honda's and he's a photographer. I told him it would be nice to get a photo of the cars.
He took one, but not of his own accord.
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︎ Aug 02 2019
What did the police officer say when he caught the artist speeding in a Honda Odyssey?
Man you really make that Van Gogh!
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︎ Oct 14 2019
Why was Hulk banned from the Honda dealership?
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︎ Jan 12 2019
My girlfriend refused to have sex on my Honda civic.
She said she will do it on her own Accord.
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︎ Aug 16 2018
Did you know the biblical apostles carpooled around in a Honda?
The Bible says they were of one Accord.
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︎ Dec 10 2018
Jesus drove a Honda, it says in the Bible:
"For I did not speak of my own Accord" John 12:49
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︎ Jul 01 2018
My wife and I couldn't agree on whether to get a Honda or a Toyota.
But we came to an Accord.
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︎ Dec 04 2018
Did you know that Jesus drove a Honda, but didn't like to talk about it?
He always said "for I do not speak of my own Accord"
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︎ Nov 16 2017
The Hulk was upset, picked up a Honda, and tossed it.
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︎ May 13 2018
When my friend from New York City drove to Nebraska in his Honda SUV, he went for a walk in the countryside...
He was out of his Element.
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︎ Mar 20 2019
I used to own a Ford subcompact, but it was stolen. So I bought a Honda SUV.
Iβve lost Focus and Iβm completely out of my Element.
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︎ Nov 28 2018
Does E. Honda from Street Fighter 2 have a Korean cousin named...
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︎ Nov 05 2018
Honda makes a special model just for Poland...
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︎ Dec 02 2018
Why couldnβt my Honda Civic fit in my garage?
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︎ Oct 19 2018
Went to a Honda dealership trying to buy a car.
Dad says "so we have reached and Accord"
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︎ Oct 22 2018
I wonder if the mechanics at the Honda dealership had to take a Civics lesson...
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︎ Jan 22 2018
If you want to ride in my 1967 Honda S800, you gotta have some bread
cuz my antique honda don't want none unless you got buns, hun.
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︎ Nov 01 2017
I was pretty mad when a bird pooped all over my Honda right after I washed it
But I guess it was only doing its Civic doody.
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︎ Nov 23 2017
What do you call a leaking Honda Civic?
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︎ Sep 11 2017
Just sold my Honda element
Guess I am out of my element now.
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︎ Apr 27 2017
What do you call the one Honda in France?
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︎ Jun 02 2017
Got my wife. She is car shopping, and looking at Hondas.
She saw an ad for a Honda Pilot, but it was sold when she called.
Me: So the Pilots are flying off the lot?
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︎ Mar 13 2017
I drive a Honda Element
I'm coming back from my lunch break and get out of my car to see my friend walking out of the building and he yells to me...
"you're lookin a little out of your element"
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︎ Oct 07 2014
My wife and I nearly got hit by a crazy man in a Honda Element, my wife noted that it was licensed out of state.
I watched the guy get out of his car and I hooked a thumb towards him and said "eh.. he's out of his element."
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︎ Sep 07 2015
Anarchists would find difficulty working at Honda specialists.
They don't like a hierarchy handing down Civic duties.
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︎ Feb 23 2015
I drive a Honda
Everywhere I go, it's of my own Accord.
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︎ Dec 12 2013
For my next car, Iβm going to buy a Honda directly from Japan and pay all the necessary tariffs.
It will be my Civic duty.
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︎ Dec 04 2020
I have decided to buy a new Honda directly from Japan and pay all the tariffs.
It will be my Civic duty.
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︎ Oct 09 2020
For my next car, Iβm thinking of buying a Honda directly from Japan and pay all the tariffs.
Itβll be my Civic duty.
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︎ Aug 30 2020
A girl invited me to have sex on her Honda Civic
But i like to have sex on my own Accord
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︎ Feb 18 2020
The CEO of Honda was fired and had to be escorted out of the building.
He did not leave on his own Accord.
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︎ Oct 24 2018
Jesus drove a Honda, but never talked about it.
"For I do not speak of my own Accord."
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︎ Dec 18 2015
Did you know? Jesus drove a Honda.
"I did not speak of my own accord." - John 12:49
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︎ Dec 10 2016
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