“Please don’t eat caviar—it’s our children!”
He now is a sturgeon
It’s a sturgeon general warning.
He’s the Sturgeon General
to become a sturgeon
Keeping up a-pier-ances
A fine piece of bass
All I really want is gulls
About a bouy
Gulls don't like bouys, gulls like cars and money
Bass and titties
Little ado a-trout nothing
Please keel free to add your own :)
A sturgeon general
He's the Sturgeon General.
My dad was listening to a couple of Scottish MP's debating on the radio. He turns to us and goes "Alex Salmond and Nicola Sturgeon. I always thought there was something fishy about those two."
Me and my dad were at the aquarium and spotted a sturgeon (a fish).
Dad: I wonder where he got his PHD? Me: I don't know, but he probably does brain sturgery.
My dad nods his head and we continue through the exhibit.
We took a plastic fish to a marching rehearsal at my university last year. Afterwards, we proceeded to have a conversation that was one pun after another.
"Fish. That is all."
"Just for the halibut."
"Oh for the love of cod, can we not bring this here?"
"Seriously, I will krill every last one of you."
"I'm not squidding with you guys. This scampi happening any more."
"Sorry. I couldn't resist the oppor-tuna-ty."
"Why, pollocks! I'm just getting started!"
"Don't worry. His shark is worse than his bite."
"Don't trout my pun ability."
"'Pun ability' my bass! You wouldn't know a fish joke if it sprat you in the eye!"
"I might need to go see a sturgeon. These jokes are killing me."
While we were having brunch, I took a delicious bite of a Smoked White Sturgeon Tartine and said "Mmmm, I love capers." My husband replied, "Is that why you watch all those crime shows?"
He still retells that one, because he's so proud of his best dad joke yet.