“Please don’t eat caviar—it’s our children!”
He now is a sturgeon
It’s a sturgeon general warning.
He’s the Sturgeon General
to become a sturgeon
Keeping up a-pier-ances
A fine piece of bass
All I really want is gulls
About a bouy
Gulls don't like bouys, gulls like cars and money
Bass and titties
Little ado a-trout nothing
Please keel free to add your own :)
He's the Sturgeon General.
My dad was listening to a couple of Scottish MP's debating on the radio. He turns to us and goes "Alex Salmond and Nicola Sturgeon. I always thought there was something fishy about those two."
Me and my dad were at the aquarium and spotted a sturgeon (a fish).
Dad: I wonder where he got his PHD? Me: I don't know, but he probably does brain sturgery.
My dad nods his head and we continue through the exhibit.
We took a plastic fish to a marching rehearsal at my university last year. Afterwards, we proceeded to have a conversation that was one pun after another.
"Fish. That is all."
"Just for the halibut."
"Oh for the love of cod, can we not bring this here?"
"Seriously, I will krill every last one of you."
"I'm not squidding with you guys. This scampi happening any more."
"Sorry. I couldn't resist the oppor-tuna-ty."
"Why, pollocks! I'm just getting started!"
"Don't worry. His shark is worse than his bite."
"Don't trout my pun ability."
"'Pun ability' my bass! You wouldn't know a fish joke if it sprat you in the eye!"
"I might need to go see a sturgeon. These jokes are killing me."
While we were having brunch, I took a delicious bite of a Smoked White Sturgeon Tartine and said "Mmmm, I love capers." My husband replied, "Is that why you watch all those crime shows?"
He still retells that one, because he's so proud of his best dad joke yet.
"What did the fish say after the chef chopped off it's tail?"
"He said, Call a Sturgeon! "
"Oh come on, you can laugh at least for the halibut"