There are rumors that Tesla is considering on a stretched, three row version of their Model X SUV. The project is on Musk's desk waiting for a decision on whether to go forward.
Their next car is Elon gated.
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︎ Sep 10 2020
In heaven, there were two huge signs. The first read, "Men Who Did What Their Wives Told Them to Do." The line of men under this sign stretched as far as the eye could see. The second sign stated, "Men Who Did What They Wanted to Do." Only one man stood under that sign...
Intrigued, St. Peter said to the lone man, βNo one has ever stood under this sign. Tell me about yourself."
The man shrugged and said, βMy wife told me to stand here.β
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︎ Jul 24 2019
So a meeting stretched on for a bit too long, and the client said 'I wouldn't mind a light lunch'.'
So, i said, 'CFL, Incandescent or LED?'
Much groaning ensued amongst my colleagues. Client laughed a lot though.
I have a feeling I'm going to enjoy working with him.
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︎ May 20 2015
I was tuning a guitar. While doing this one of the stings snapped in half perfectly. I took one half and stretched It out. I managed to get it on. One problem though. As soon as I played it shot straight to the ceiling.
Iβd never heard or seen such a high note.
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︎ Dec 18 2018
My nephew was playing with a corded telephone and walked so far the cord was stretched out. Enter my brother-in-law
"What are you doing? Making a long distance call?"
He was so proud of the joke he called me in as the only other person who would appreciate it.
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︎ Oct 12 2015
Stretching it a bit
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︎ Feb 22 2021
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︎ Dec 01 2020
Just spent $300 on hiring a limousine and discovered the fee doesn't include a driver.
Can't believe I've spent all that money and have nothing to chauffer it.
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︎ Jan 29 2021
What shape is a kiss?
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︎ Mar 26 2021
I sure hope Elon Musk doesn't get into a scandal.
Yeah. Elongate could stretch out forever.
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︎ Feb 23 2021
To call the whole Elon Musk controversy βElon-Gateβ seems like a bit of a stretch
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︎ Sep 09 2018
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︎ Dec 25 2019
what do you call a woman who can stretch her legs across a tennis court?
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︎ Feb 13 2020
"Cheer up, you could be a replacement stake in the ground for barbed wire to stretch upon," said one new joke to another.
"Yeah, I guess I could be a repost," said the other new joke.
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︎ Apr 09 2020
Yoga bends. Yoga stretches. Yoga realizes heβs completely out of shape.
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︎ Jan 15 2020
I donβt know why my wife criticized me for not stretching after exercising.
She knew I was already knotted up about it.
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︎ Jan 25 2020
A friend of mine was discouraged that they couldn't come up with dad jokes. I told them anyone can make dad jokes, you just have to stretch out the thought process a little father.
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︎ Aug 07 2019
Mart Mc Fly traveling into the Star Wars universe be like,
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︎ Nov 28 2020
Mom: I hear that John's business is doing a lot better. How did he manage to get enough people to slow down on that stretch of highway to even notice his store? Dad: Oh, he followed my advice and put up a billboard.
"Nude Colony Ahead, Keep Your Eyes on the Road!"
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︎ Dec 23 2019
How does a Muslim close the door?
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︎ Sep 13 2020
If a male owl's sibling adopts a baboon,
then owl be a monkey's uncle.
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︎ Nov 01 2020
Risky Dad Joke: My wife said the stretch marks on her legs looked like lightning bolts...
So I said, that's because you have thunder thighs.
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︎ Jul 10 2014
Bit of a stretch, but has potential if said differently...
"Do you know the alphabet?"
"No, I'm a beta."
"OMeGa"
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︎ Apr 14 2019
I tried Yoga for the first time...
I'd say I enjoyed it, but that would be a stretch.
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︎ Nov 25 2020
I have a stretch limo tesla
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︎ Jun 16 2019
Ive been going to this amazing socialist prenatal yoga center called Stretch Marx.
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︎ Nov 26 2018
Doctor Doctor, I'm convinced I'm a rubber band.
Why don't you stretch yourself out on the couch over there and tell me all about it.
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︎ Nov 25 2020
If you try to stretch a fork to see if it breaks...
...are you testing its utensil strength?
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︎ Dec 01 2018
What does a 6'10" Irishman with a sunburn have in common with the star named Betelgeuse?
They're both red giants, and way bigger than my son(sun).
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︎ Aug 22 2020
What do you call a smart fart?
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︎ May 20 2020
After the husband refused to stretch his tender loins, his wife started placing his favorite dinner on the roof for him...
But the steaks were too high
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︎ May 17 2019
A sketchy guy just came into my shop and bought six smoke machines. So I called the cops.
He must be a part of some extreme mist group.
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︎ Nov 03 2018
My wife keeps insisting that I should warm up before I start exercising.
Sounds like a stretch to me.
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︎ Nov 16 2020
People always ask why I stretch while on Reddit.
I am a practitioner of Karma Yoga.
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︎ Mar 28 2019
Definitely a repost! maybe a bit of a stretch..... So Giraffes...
One of the dumbest animals out there.... Their heads are always in the clouds.
One of the most stubborn too.... Takes them forever to swallow their pride.
At the same time; the nicest! .....They'll stick their neck out for anyone.
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︎ Aug 28 2018
I wanted to tell a yoga joke.
But it was a bit of a stretch.
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︎ May 28 2020
I would tell you a pun about gymnasts, but...
Itβs a bit of a stretch...
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︎ Jun 26 2020
To avoid strain when thinking about working out involves a stretch of my imagination.
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︎ Jun 25 2017
Have you heard the joke about yoga?
Never mind. It's a bit of a stretch.
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︎ Sep 21 2020
The other day my yoga instructor was drunk
It put me in quite an awkward position
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︎ May 30 2020
Where'd he keep the weasel
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︎ Sep 29 2018
I started dating my yoga instructor.
Now we're friends with zenefits.
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︎ Feb 28 2020
My doctor asked if Iβd considered whether yoga could help with my anxiety.
I said, βI think thatβs a bit of a stretchβ
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︎ Sep 04 2020
My Dad After Doing Some Stretches
Dad led face down on floor
Concerned Daughter: "Are you alright?"
Dad: "No, I'm half left."
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︎ Jan 05 2014
What is the most important part of a stretch limo Tesla Model S
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︎ Dec 26 2017
For my next trick,I will disappear.
"Fuck you,pear. You taste like shit."
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︎ Jun 16 2018
What do you call a yoga studio with Wahlberg, Zuckerberg and Hamill?
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︎ Aug 15 2020
Mmmm
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︎ Jul 31 2019
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