If an octopus is called an octopus because of its eight limbs, what would you call an octopus with only seven limbs?
An amputee.
Another one for the IT crowd (if you got this, you are old - sorry)
How do you measure how heavy a chili pepper is?
Give it a weigh, give it a weigh, give it a weigh now.
My friend told me that eagles eat small insects and seeds
I said “that’s bushtit!”
What do you call an alligator wearing a vest?
An investigator
My son wanted some girl advice, so I told him, “If you are intimidated by a date, remember one thing.”
They are just big raisins.
Two fishes are in a tank
One of them says "so how do I drive this thing"
What’s green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree could kill you?
A pool table!
Perhaps the greatest Facebook comment I have ever made
What do you call a barking dog in the Arctic?
A sub-woofer
Thanks for sorting by new you are doing a great job :)
So a snake walks in to a bar
The bartender says, "How'd you do that?"
Two parrots on a perch
One says to the other: Can you smell fish?
My wife found her first whole sand dollar at the beach.
I told her that she's rich. A whole sand dollar is worth 100 sand cents.
(wife shakes head in utter disappointment)
[REQUEST] Star Wars Bird Puns
Working on a little something. Give me your best and I will include you in the credits.
So far I only have: Coo Skywalker
Edit: thanks for all the replies! I will post game here soon, and pm those whose puns I end up using.
What crime was the fire-starting bear charged with?
Urson.
