A farmer said to me β€œI have 68 sheep. Can you help round them up for me?”

I said sure. 70.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rfcoc
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
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Sheepdog: All 40 sheep are accounted for, boss. Farmer: But I only had 39?

Sheepdog: Yeah I know, but I rounded them up!

πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cotswoldboy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2021
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β€œI love my job!” exclaimed the farmer. β€œAll you do is boss me around all day!” complained one of his sheep. β€œWhat did you say?” challenged the farmer. The sheep glared back and growled...

β€œYou herd me!"

πŸ‘︎ 783
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2020
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A sheep farmer was having a bad day..

The sheep were all β€œbaaa” then another would reply β€œbaaa” and another β€œbaaa” and on an on β€œbaaa” Finally the farmer bursts out: β€œAll right, all right, I herd you!!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PileOfThoughts
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2021
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As a farmer, I hear lots of jokes about sheep...

I’d tell them to my dog but he’d herd them all

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/linkhandford
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2020
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A sheep dog says to the farmer, "I'm going to round up the sheep."

The dog comes back with 50 sheep. The farmers says, "we only have 48 sheep." The dog replies, "Yea, I told you I was going to round them up."

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NeGuy1
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2019
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Sheepdog: Yep, that’s 40 sheep there. Farmer: What, there should be only 37?

Sheepdog: Hey, I rounded them up!

πŸ‘︎ 65
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2020
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A farmer asked his dad if he could round up his 36 sheep

β€œSure,” said the dad β€œ40.”

πŸ‘︎ 78
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dandan_56
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2020
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Two farmers were talking. "Mate, why do all your sheep have those black stripes on their sides?"

" It's my new counting system, see that special collar on me dog, it's got a camera and it scans the sheep as the dog rounds them up. "

"Damn me, what'll they think of next? What's it called?"

"Baa codes mate"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AustralianGroan
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2020
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A sheep dog tells a farmer, "I've gathered up 40 sheep". The farmer replies, "But we only have 37 sheep?" The dog responds..

"I've rounded them up"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DipNotes
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2020
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How did the sheep farmer become best in his field?

Shear luck.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/joeChump
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2019
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My girlfriend is a sheep farmer. When she starts to have orgasms, she wants me to shout the names of local movie showplaces.

She likes coming to a theater near ewe.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2019
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A farmer had 98 sheep, when he rounded them up he had 100.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/n3rv0u5
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2018
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Did you hear how the farmer got so much wool from his sheep this year?

It was shear luck

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arctureas
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2018
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What did the abused sheep day to the farmer?

Baby don't herd me, don't herd me, no more.

Edit: I fucked up the title, I know.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2016
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A sheepdog tells the farmer he's going to round up the sheep and comes back with 50 sheep and the farmer says "We only have 48 sheep."

The dog replies "I said I was going to round them up,"

πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Trtlman
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2020
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Sheep to Farmer: All you do is boss me around all day!

Farmer: What did you say?

Sheep: You herd me.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pozd5995
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2020
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Why won't the dog listen to the farmer's sheep jokes?

Because he has herd them all.

πŸ‘︎ 105
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iknowthisischeesy
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
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A farmer asked me if I can help him round up 18 sheep

I said sure, it's 20

πŸ‘︎ 170
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ar1stocrat
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2019
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A farmer came up to me and said, "I have 68 sheep, can you round them up for me?"

"sure" I said

"70"

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mo_Stache_
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2018
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A Farmer has 98 sheep, when he rounds them up he has 100.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/n3rv0u5
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2019
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A farmer came up to me and said, "I have 68 sheep. Can you round them up for me??"

I went, "sure, 70"

πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tempsilon
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2018
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A farmer and his dog are herding sheep.

They finish and the dog says "I counted 40 sheep"

The farmer replies, "Weird, I only got 37"

The dog replies "I rounded them up"

πŸ‘︎ 43
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Murphy223
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2018
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A farmer and his dog are herding sheep. They finish and his dog says "I counted 40 sheep". The farmer replies, "That's odd I only got 37.”

The dog replies "I rounded them up".

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zortor
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2018
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