Guys, I have been thinking about selling my Theremin.
I haven't touched it in years.
I decided to sell my vacuum...
It was only collecting dust.
Why did Beethoven sell all his chickens?
Because they kept saying, “Bach, Bach, Bach.”
There's a woman in the park selling batteries...
She sells, C cells by the seesaw.
Why do they sell candles with lids?
So McDonald’s was recently considering selling higher cuts of beef.
But they decided it was a McSteak.
I'm sick and tired of people coming into my house, trying to sell me books, and then just marching out and leaving the door wide open.
Were these people born in a Barnes and Noble or something?
What's something a drug dealer would never ask?
What do you call a store that sells only bagels and donuts?
I asked the librarian if books about paranoia were available.
She looked up and whispered, "They're right behind you".
Because of his enormous debt, Old McDonald has to sell his farm.
To cover what he e-i-e-i owes.
Hershey’s and Ikea have joined together to sell a chocolate pet.
Just picked up a Kït Kaát. Now to put it together...
My uncles petshop really started doing well when he started selling parrots. They literally flew of the shelves.
I have a business selling foreign ants.
My wife raises animals and also sells medicines
She's a farmercist
(based on a true story)
Police are looking for a man selling marijuana to birds...
Eyewitness reported, he left no tern unstoned.
Went to GameStop to use the bathroom, but it was out of order...
I guess I have to keep holding it.
A friend of mine makes good money selling camel’s milk, but he has to put up with surly camels all day.
I’m selling a TV for $1, but it’s broken and it’s stuck on the highest volume.
It’s something you can’t turn down!
People who sell meat are gross.
But people who sell fruits and vegetables are grocer.
That's it !!! I'm boycotting any store that sells stuff....
I'm thinking of selling my Roomba
It's just collecting dust...
I saw a sign the other day, "we sell moving boxes"
I guess they don't sell stationery boxes.
What do you call a factory that sells passable products?
I make money by selling simple sandwiches
Man: “Are you certain this dog you’re selling me is loyal?”
Owner: “Of course he sure is. I’ve sold him five times, and every time he comes back.”
I'm going to sell my Hoover
It's just collecting dust.
I’m in Tampa bay right now and they’re selling corn on the cob...
Man with 2 left feet goes into a shoe store and asks....
"Do you sell flop flops?"
Why did the poor man sell yeast?
A salesperson came to my door yesterday trying to sell me a coffin.
I told him, "That's the last thing I need".
I went into a Gamestop, but they weren't selling anything but chewing tobacco
My sister didn't get my pun
A lobster and a shrimp opened a highly expensive pufferfish shop.
I guess selfish shellfish sell swell fish.
If there's someone selling drugs here..
Just heard there is a geezer down the market selling Oxford vaccination for £2 each
Me: Were you able to get ahold of that lady selling the John Deere? My husband:
The salesman at the furniture store told me, “This sofa will seat 5 people without any problems.”
I said, “Where the hell am I going to find 5 people without any problems?”
They're gonna sell corn on the cob at the Super Bowl, and it's rumored to be cheap.
Selling kitchen utensils is a wisky business
So is selling hard liquor
What do you call a biker gang that sells bread?
My wife has been complaining that I don’t buy her flowers. Tbh I don’t even know she started selling flowers.
Couldn’t post it earlier. Doing dishes, making everyone’s bed, taking trash and all the other household chores ate up all my evening.
Why dont grocery stores sell clothing?
Because they don't know what the woolworths.
I decided to sell my vacuum cleaner...
Well, it was just collecting dust.
People who sell meat and meat products may be disgusting to some people, but.....
People selling fruits and vegetables are definitely grocer.
People who sell meat are gross.
But people who sell fruits and vegetables are grocer.
I decided to sell my vacuum...
I had to sell my vacuum cleaner
It was just gathering dust
Just heard there's a guy down Borough market selling Oxford vaccinations for £2 each...
A vegan told me, "People who sell meat are disgusting!"
I told them "people who sell fruits and vegetables grocer"
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