Helium ~is~ lighter than air
Remind them to use the [spoiler] tag. Some of us haven’t read the book.
Ever Easter when my dad would first see me in the morning. Every. Fucking. Easter.
I’ve started taking steps to avoid them
I kneaded that.
Thanks, it's been well risen.
Historically, on this day, prophets have risen!
Relevant info: my mom is Christian, my dad is Jewish.
My dad loves to silently craft his dad jokes until the morning of any Christian holiday. He did not disappoint today.
Dad: I've been really popular on Facebook this morning. Me: Oh yeah? Dad: All of my friends have been commenting on my sleep patterns. [longish pause while he gets this gleeful-boyish look because of the confusion he can see on my face) Dad: They keep posting about how "He has risen!"
He's saying this to every member of our family, one-by-one, as we wake up.
Today i made myself a pizza. When it was done, looking all puffed up and cheesy, i took it out of the oven, held it above my head, and shouted, "The Crust Has Risen!"
I was slightly speeding through a speed trap, yesterday. My FIL said, "Careful, you don't want a speeding ticket on Easter Sunday..."
I responded, "I know... Fee has risen."
My dad cranks out jokes left and right during each dinner we have together.
Today though, got more groans than usual.
My mom has been suffering some back pain this week, and today was especially bad. The kitchen lights were giving her a headache to boot. She asked "it's to bright in here..."trying to ask if someone would turn of the lights. She didn't stand a chance, before even finishing her sentence my dad had already risen with his plate and fork in hand and exclaimed "I'll just eat in the other room then".
Sat down with my kids to share wonderful lunch my wife prepared for this cold day. Took a bite and spit it out, "what is this!? It's cold!"
I think I've risen to so immortality in the eyes of my children.
"Jesus has risen, and so should you."
