Between you and me, something smells.
He eventually came around
She was my Seoul mate.
"Well, at least you could try."
I propose we call it the "Chicken Coup"
I said, “Thanks babe. You Mrs. Right!”
Feel free to disagree, that’s just my two scents.
I have to admit... it was a pretty good counter argument.
They'll use it for the launch of the new iFawn.
...she was a keeper.
Are you left behind?
You might find find yourself looking at a slippery slope.
I need to concentrate.
My grades are below C-level
It's a huge Pine in the Ash
"Or I'll-dente my teeth."
Brought to you by my dad.
That’s your own asphalt
She said. Our cars aren’t social distancing! You don’t want them to get ...CARona virus do you?
Proud moment.
All his best days are now left behind.
Rubbing his hands
He scored a home run every single at bat, and always the exact same way. Way over right field, too high for anyone to reach, and it always landed in exactly the 17th row of the stands, give or take a couple feet.
He earned the nickname “the machine” for how consistently he hit the exact same spot every time. Right field, 17th row, every single time. He did this for 20 years before he retired. Tickets to the 2-3 seats that the ball always landed on sold for over $2k a pop by the time he retired because you were guaranteed at least a couple home run balls.
And the day he retired a reporter asked him “How does it feel to be retiring as the greatest hitter of all time?”
Hugh just looked at the reporter puzzled. “What do you mean?” He said.
The reporter clarified “literally over 5,000 times you went to the plate and hit a home run to right field, 17th row of the stands!”
Hugh looked dejected and disappointed “yeah, my greatest failure...”
“What do you mean?” Said the reporter incredulously.
Hugh let’s out a long sigh, and looked down at the ground quietly for a moment before finally speaking.
“I’ve been aiming left this whole time”
No idea why the school hired him.
He's not dead by the way, just very condescending.
But he just wasn't using the right Al Gore-ithm
Between you and me something smells
