My wife ordered a stool form an online retailer

Wife: "It is arriving tomorrow."

Me: "If you do not like it, can we return it within 30 days?"

Wife: "Yes, why do you ask?"

Me: "Does that make it a stool sample then?"

Wife: "..."

True story, including her lack of enthusiasm for my obviously excellent sense of humor.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mbrown705
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2019
🚨︎ report
I work in the appliance department at a large retailer and we were working on a truck delivery.

On one of our pallettes was a 12" sub that was meant for the car electronics department.

I look to my co-workers and say "Maybe we should refrigerate it.".

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2019
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Did you hear that the largest online retailer started selling steaks?

Amazon Prime Rib.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_drumstic_
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2017
🚨︎ report
I went to a open home and the retail salesman showed me around.

I asked the retail salesman "what's up stairs?"

He replied "no, the stairs dont talk"

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/C9SF-Dr0p
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18
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Why don't you want to be sad at a retail store?

You'd be at the lowest of Lowe's

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cresendo77
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28
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ReTAIL therapy for the K9's!
πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tacomaster9000
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22
🚨︎ report
You know, if you have seen one collection of retail outlets under one roof, you have seen a mall.
πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/heavyduty1930
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10
🚨︎ report
I work in retail and today a mom asked about β€œMy Hero Macadamia”

It was nuts!

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Philonic
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02
🚨︎ report
Where does Eeyore work?

In retail

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/0reopanda_
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11
🚨︎ report
I'm apparently really attractive to retail workers.

The cashiers check me out every time I go shopping!

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_otterinabox
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2019
🚨︎ report
A man wanted to buy a good insecticide

"Is this good for wasps ?" a man asked the retailer.

"No, it kills them" the retailer replayed.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 24
🚨︎ report
Where do lizards go to fix their fallen tails?

The retail shop

πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/foxtailavenger
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2019
🚨︎ report
I work at a retail store and two guys stole a calender

They both got 6 months

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Johnny_Two_Timez
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Nothing says "Christmas" like cheesy puns. (Sorry for triggering the PTSD of any retail workers)
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lams1d
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2018
🚨︎ report
Where does a dog go when he loses his tail?

A retail store

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dam_b_ver
πŸ“…︎ May 12
🚨︎ report
Where do animals go when their tails fall off?

The Retail store

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HANZ06
πŸ“…︎ May 16
🚨︎ report
Every time I go into a retail store, I always want to buy an item separator.

But the cashier keeps putting them back.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mewtwo_Nex
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2019
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Got a job selling new tails to animals that lose them.

I work in retail sales... 🀨

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bradb717
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13
🚨︎ report
All this time The Terminator was just have PTSD episodes from working retail
πŸ‘︎ 254
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aznednacni
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2015
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Dad joke upon checkout in retail

Store clerk: Can I get an email address?

Me: Sure! Go to gmail.com and click β€œregister.” You can make up pretty much anything you want.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KennethPowersIII
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2018
🚨︎ report
Where do animals go when they lose their tail?

They go to the retail store.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BladeSides
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30
🚨︎ report
If I was the owner of a retail store...

I'd put the torches in the darkest part of the shop.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2018
🚨︎ report
Where should a monkey go when it loses it's tail?

A retailer.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CCG_UNITED
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19
🚨︎ report
It's like I've always said, if you've seen one collection of retail outlets under one roof...

...you've seen a mall.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Discount_Dracula
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2018
🚨︎ report
Even in Retail, Dad Jokes Will Find a Way.

A husband and wife approached my register, and there's a variety of ways a customer will tell me they are in our rewards program. "I'm in the club." "I have a rewards card." Etc. There are a couple of weird ones people say, which brings us to this exchange I witnessed:

> Me: hi there, did you find everything okay?

> Wife: Yes, thank you. points to my till I'm in your computer, there.

> Husband: How the HELL did you fit in there?

> Wife: No, I meant I'm in the system!

> Husband: GASP You didn't tell me you were arrested!!!

> Wife: I swear to God I'm gonna hurt you.

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NinaBisk
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2017
🚨︎ report
The most expensive diamond in 2017 sold for $71.2 million USD

to Hong Kong-based jewelry retailer Chu Tai Fook. Over the last few months as the protests in Hong Kong have become heated Mr. Chu has been on the side of the government which has caught the eye of the international gem dealers, causing him to become a bit of a pariah.

The diamond went up for sale his and the Chinese government wanted to ensure that world's most expensive gem got a fair price. Mr. Chu approached Southerby's who was hesitant to get involved in what could be deemed a political gem sale. Despite his protests none of the world's leading auction houses the answer was always the same, they would not do the auction. This is when president Xi Jiping got involved to ensure that some good news could come out of China.

Last week it was reported that Rick Harrison, from Pawn Stars, had approached Xi Jinping saying that he would hold the diamond but couldn't promise more than $500 USD from the sale of the pendant. This infuriated the Chinese president threatened to take down

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Poortio
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Is Google Assistant a dad?

http://i.imgur.com/KD1dxhgh.jpg

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GiveMeBackMySon
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2016
🚨︎ report
A brunette asked her blonde friend why she seemed so sad, she said I'm really upset because my cat lost his tail.

The brunette said, well why dont you take it to Walmart, it's the largest retailer in the world.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/klmkab04
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Why is Christmas shopping a sin?

Because the devil is in the retails.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tachankas_chanka
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend who works in retail overheard a dad joking his daughter

A man is paying for his daughter's clothes in the store my girlfriend works at.

Girlfriend: Credit or debit?

Dad: C.O.D.

Girlfriend: ?

Dad: Cash on Daddy! (turns to his daughter and starts chuckling out loud)

πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nyphur
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2015
🚨︎ report
Where do you take a dog when it’s tail falls off?

The retail store

πŸ‘︎ 60
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NoKroger
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Got a co-worker today, I work in a food department in retail.

"Hey can I borrow your date gun?"

"Why? Are you feeling lonely?"

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Aquafier
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2015
🚨︎ report
While working retail during a sale this weekend

Me: Hi Sir! Just to let you know, the entire store is at least half off today!

Him: he looks around for a second Really? Because it seems like it's all here to me!

Caught me wayyy off guard, but definitely made my shitty day better!

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rev1212
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2014
🚨︎ report
I’m making a name for myself at work...

So there we were, in the break room of a retail establishment.

A coworker was trying to toss her salad and one of my friends looks at me and says, β€œgo ahead, do it!”

And I’m trying not to laugh, β€œdo what?”

And he says, β€œmake a joke! You want to, I can see it on your face!”

β€œI can’t, it’s not—” I don’t get to finish my sentence.

β€œWhy not!?” He asks, as if he’s disappointed.

β€œBecause…” ( β€’_β€’)>βŒβ– -β– 

β€œβ€¦I’m turning over a new leaf.” (βŒβ– _β– )

πŸ‘︎ 49
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mapkar
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2019
🚨︎ report
My buddy's dad pulled this one at some retail store the other day

The cashier asked him if he wanted to be a member there and he said Yes so the cashier proceeded to ask "okay what's your street name?" He relied "tall white boy from the hood"

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Qazdthm
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2015
🚨︎ report
Dadjoked a coworker at a retail store.

This one doesn't work as well typed out, but it's still pretty good. A co-worker was putting up a basket of returns, and he stopped by to ask me where the Efferdent goes. I said "I don't know, maybe you should put some more effort into it."

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MetalJunkie101
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2015
🚨︎ report
Walked into a retail store, associate asks "do you need a hand?"

"No thanks, I've got two."

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MystikIncarnate
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2015
🚨︎ report
Dadjoked a customer last week [Retail]

So I work at a hardware store/fish & tackle shop on a fairly affluent barrier island in Florida...tons of rich old WASPs (we're talking DuPont heir money here).

Anyways, a regular comes up to the front register with a saw and some saw blades. I took note of his purchases and said to the guy "How do these work? Some sort of coping mechanism?"

He looked down for a second, began to explain (in a somewhat demeaning tone) how a coping saw works, looked up and saw my shit eating grin.

grooaaannnn "Oh you ass, that was witty. You got me though!"

I later learned that day that his wife had died three months earlier...whoops.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Cameraman
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2014
🚨︎ report
Worked retail on black friday and a dad came in.

Employee: "The whole store is 30% off."

Dad: "Oh jeez, I don't think I can afford that much"

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Talking_Monkey93
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2014
🚨︎ report
While working retail tonight, I was wearing a bag we sell like a hat as I was walking around and shelving items...

Manager says "Take that off, you're going to rip it."

I respond: "Well if I do it will be on my head."

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/footstepsfading
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2014
🚨︎ report
Buddy Doesn't Know How to Park

So this is a true story.

I work a retail job. My friend neglected to properly put his Mustang in park in his space. It moved backwards across the lot and in to a customer's Jeep Grand Cherokee. Luckily for him, the damage was not serious.

Unlucky for him, all of my coworkers (and a few customers) proceeded to mercilessly roast him on the showroom floor.

Looking to me to defend him, he asked, "why don't you back me up?"

I said: "Back up seems to be the last thing you need, I'd just learn to roll with it, you might say I'm pretty neutral..."

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/allnerdsbewareme
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Where did the cat go after it lost it’s tail?

The retail store

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/connornel18
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2019
🚨︎ report
My dog bit off my cat's tail off today. My dad said I should take the cat to Target

Since they are such a good retailer

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Challengedildo
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a toy that doesn't come with batteries?

Free of charge

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Scoob1978
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2018
🚨︎ report
Where do animals go when they lose their tails?

The retail store

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cellvive
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the the dog do when he lost his tail?

He went to the retail store

πŸ‘︎ 142
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πŸ‘€︎ u/joanna810
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2018
🚨︎ report
Where does the dog go after losing their tail?

The retail store.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The747IsDead
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Sudden Urge to get Naked

(x-post from /r/TalesFromRetail)
[was told I should post it here as well]

This happened shortly after I started back to work in retail.

My grocery shift had just started and I was about to begin facing one end of an aisle when I spotted a man in his mid to late 30s at the other end of the aisle. We made eye contact and he made a beeline straight for me.

Me: "Hi. How are you today?"
Him: "Do you know what to do if you get a sudden urge to strip off all your clothes and run around naked in public?"

Now, at this moment, I'm not sure what's happening. I can't pick up any clues from his body language that would indicate where this conversation is going to go. I'm a wee bit concerned that this man is about to start taking off his clothes in front of me. Not exactly what I had planned for the day. He's staring at me intently, waiting for a reply. I don't want to spook him, so I do the only thing I can think of and that's just to stand there and stare at him silently.

After a few

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/unicorn_brew
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2014
🚨︎ report
[Request] A name for a store.

I was just assigned an architecture project to design a retail building of some sort. The products, name and theme are all free for me to choose, so I want to make it a killer pun.

What's a punny store name/product combo I can use?

πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Reason-and-rhyme
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2014
🚨︎ report
Dad joked by an 81-year-old woman

I work in a medical lab. I had an elderly patient today who was visibly upset, almost to the point of tears. I asked her if she was worried about having her blood drawn and she said that the blood draw didn’t bother her, but that she was upset because she had hit a cat with her car on the way to her appointment this morning. She said that she didn’t know who the cat belonged to and that she had it wrapped up in a blanket in her car. I asked her how badly the cat was hurt and she said β€œI think he’s going to be alright. I just clipped the hind end of him, but his tail is just barely hanging on. After I leave here, I’m taking him straight to Wal-Mart.”

I told her that she might be better off taking the cat to a veterinary clinic instead of Wal-Mart and she said, β€œbut it’s just his tail, and Wal-Mart is the largest retailer in North America!”

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Doc_Hooligan
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2017
🚨︎ report
When a dog lost it’s tail where does it go?

To the retail store!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Denis0913
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2018
🚨︎ report
Dadjoked a manager over the walkie.

I was working the closing shift at a retail store where every associate carries a walkie. Before closing time, a manager will generally ask which departments need help zoning (cleaning, facing merchandise, etc) and the associates will help the other departments. The other night:

Manager: -kssht- How are we on the floor?

Me:- kssht- Gravity.

πŸ‘︎ 221
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MetalJunkie101
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2015
🚨︎ report
Where do dogs who lose their tail go?

To a retail store.

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/raytrace75
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2017
🚨︎ report
My dog's tail got cut off today,

So i took him to the retail store for a new one.

πŸ‘︎ 43
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OneCoolGuy234
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2016
🚨︎ report
What's the combination of Finland and France?

Finance

I work in a retail store with credit card financing signs all over the place. It was slow and boring, so I fixated on said word.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Seekerman
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2018
🚨︎ report
A young boy walks up to his father with a mouse and it's tail missing.

The boy is worried, thinking the mouses life is ruined since it no longer has its tail. The father says "Don't worry son, it can always go to the retail store"

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/killer98
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2017
🚨︎ report
Bank Joke

I work in a retail bank and a customer walked into the office and said: Teller asks customer if he'd like her to check his balance. He says yes. So she pushes him over.

ba dum chiss

πŸ‘︎ 103
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sizzlebutt666
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2014
🚨︎ report
What do you say when you walk into a pot shop?

High.

This is a real deal "joke" from my dad today. The first retail mj store just opened in his town. He's 60.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vatothe0
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2018
🚨︎ report
I got a Red Riding Hood hood for 60% off

I guess you call a fair retail

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/logiko
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2017
🚨︎ report
Got dad joked into next week at work

I work at a supplement retail store and usually greet people with "Hey! How are you today? What brings you in today?" and usually people will just tell me what they are looking for. So, I did the same thing to a man ~50 years old today, but instead of the usual response I get, he just responded with "My feet."

10/10. Would be dad-joked again.

πŸ‘︎ 105
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SnapCrack1ePop
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2015
🚨︎ report
weed whacking neighbour

My Dad told me his neighbor was weed whacking and ended up snipping off a quarter of his cats tail by mistake. He ended up bringing the cat to Walmart because they are the worlds biggest retailer.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JDIPrime
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2014
🚨︎ report
Where does a cat go, when the cat loses it’s tail?

The retail store.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_MadPsycho_
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2017
🚨︎ report
Where does a Dog go when it loses its tail?

The RETAIL store!

my 4 year old slapped me for saying this. haha

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/1Darkest_Knight1
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2017
🚨︎ report
My dad has always been dad joke gold

Match.com is in the retail business. If you don't like the tail your with, they will help you re-tail

πŸ‘︎ 83
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cakewalking
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2014
🚨︎ report
My dad has a whole list of responses to the same question

Any retail/coffee clerk: how are you today sir?

Dad: Like a fart in a space suit, Like a fire hydrant at a dog parade, Can I get back to you on that?, Like a one legged man in an ass kicking contest

There is more I just can't remember them all. So embarrassing.

πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jaimel7477
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2013
🚨︎ report
Was in the Amazon part of the Baltimore Aquarium...

and my dad looked at me and goes "I didn't realize we were in an online retailer!!!"

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/harajukugirl135
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2013
🚨︎ report
I dadjoked my boss today. He didn't see it coming.

So I work retail and I was restocking shelves on a hardware isle with tools, doohickeys, and thingies. He was walking and talking with a new boss (training him and such) when they stopped at my isle. They didn't really notice me so it was perfect.

I picked up a stud finder and hit 'em with a classic!

"Hey guys check it out! It's a stud finder" Runs it over chest "Beep beep beep. Oh hey it's working!"

My boss had a few chuckles and the other guy said something about it being stupid but smiled anyways. Me? I was laughing my ass off.

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheUndeadKid
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2014
🚨︎ report
Got dad joked at the bookstore where I work today

I work at a large retail bookstore, and my job is basically just to wander around and help people find what they're looking for. Yesterday I spotted an older gentleman looking lost, so I asked him if he needed help finding anything.

"Yeah, the new Dr. Seuss one, whatever it is."

So I led him to the kid's section where we have a whole display for What Pet Should I Get.

"This one's been really popular, as you can guess," I said as I grabbed one off the display for him. As I did so, a few of the books behind it toppled off the display and onto the ground.

"Yeah," he said, "I can see they're just flying off the shelves."

I laughed for a few minutes and he left with his book and the look of satisfaction that only comes from a top-tier dad joke.

Edit: Oops. Put 'today' in the title but it rly happened yesterday. Sorry! :x

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/5lash3r
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2015
🚨︎ report
Nailed a customer today

A customer at the major retail corporation I work at picked up our ad while I was cashing him out. Tried to pull one on me...

"they call it a doorbuster sale and there's not a single door in this ad! "

"That's because we busted them all, sir"

Completely straight faced. He walked away laughing his ass off. On an unrelated note I think my girlfriend may be pregnant.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hepatitisbees
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2015
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They spelt it wrong

My 9yo saw my wife's shopping bag she brought home from the "TYPO" gift store and declared, "Hey, they spelt it wrong."

I said, "Maybe it was just a 'typo'..."

(Photo of TYPO Store) http://www.canelandcentral.com.au/~/media/retail/au/caneland-central/stores/typo8905.ashx?as=0&mh=1130

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bishslap
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2016
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At least he tried

There was this lady cutting vegetables with her brand new knife. The knife slipped from her hand hitting her cat in the ass cutting its tail off. She quickly wrapped the cat in a towel and headed for the door. Her husband asked "where are you going to take it". She replied " I'm taking him to walmart they're the worlds largest retailer."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoMich85
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2014
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I dadjoke customers a lot.

I work retail and we have a loyalty program that requires an email address.

Every time someone gives me an email with a number at the end (ex: [email protected]) I ask if the first 90 were already taken.

I'm the only one who laughs.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jolsiphur
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2014
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My sister will make a great father.

My sister works at a major retailer, so of course the last few days have been pretty crazy for her.

She bemoaned to me:

>People keep coming in the new iPad, which we don't have! And I can't like, take a minute to myself because of that.

...

>How am I supposed to breathe without any Airs?!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/annaftw
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2013
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3 4 5

Context:

  • I currently live and study in the Philippines

  • One Philippine Peso (β‚±) is approximately 1/40 a dollar. Go check the conversion ratio if you doubt.

  • A single stick of this choco wafer stick right here (called Stick-O) usually costs at about β‚±1

  • I study in a college where student organizations are prevalent and their means of collecting funds is by Fund Raising Activity, i.e., selling consumables to students (usually food at exorbitant retail prices)


Every single time when I see an organization member doing his/her FRA selling Stick-O's, I ask...

Me: How much is that?

FRA: Three for five.

Me: β‚±3 for 5 pieces?

They chuckle in shame. They then correct me:

FRA: No, 3 pieces for β‚±5 pesos

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πŸ‘€︎ u/francis_0000a
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2014
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When the ghost backed into a fan, why did he go to the liquor store?

Because he'd heard that's where they retail spirits.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HandsomePotRoast
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2014
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My dog was so excited to see my dad

My dad walked in and my dog was so excited and his tail was wagging so fast.

Me (to my dog) - If your tail wags any fast it's going to fall off

Dad (to my dog) - Then we'll have to take you to the retail store.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FatBox360
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2014
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Are you helping with the truck tonight?

"No, I'm a freight-not"

For those who don't know, in retail and similar stores, when a truck comes in delivering merchandise, it's the freight truck.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/McJ_swirl
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2015
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Someone got dadjoked at /r/TalesFromRetail

http://www.reddit.com/r/TalesFromRetail/comments/20wpl4/you_dont_wanna_stripsearch_me/

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sabr0e
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2014
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After 11 months I created a Dad Joke Masterpiece

The lady, son, and I were in a retail store the other day when an annoucement was made over the PA system.

"Customer needs assistance in the vacuum cleaners"

I lean towards the wife and say, "Well this Hoover sucks. Oh, the Dyson it also sucks. To be honest, they all suck."

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/crazeeeastcracker
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2014
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Dadjoked a coworker.

I work at a retail grocery store in the deli. I am also 6'7". I was tasked with detailing our warmer and I was working on the bottom part. Getting down is my natural enemy so I was sitting on a milk crate. Coworker from meat department comes over and asks if we had his squeegee. We did so I told him. He said, "For shame, you should feel bad." I then told him, "You're going to judge me while I'm at my lowest?"

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tinkleheimer
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2014
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Where does a dog go when he loses his tail?

A retail store

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wasabimohmayahai
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05
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Where does a cat go when he has lost his tail?

A retail store.

πŸ‘︎ 162
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Manny-Hatz
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2018
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Where does a dog go when it loses it's tail?

To a RETAIL store

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rmartin217
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2018
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Where does a dog go when it loses its tail?

the retail store

πŸ‘︎ 47
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DreamsD351GN
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2017
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Where does a dog go if he loses his tail?

To the retail store

πŸ‘︎ 100
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ZeonPeonTree
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2017
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Where does a dog go when it loses its tail?

To a retail store!

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/penguinland
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2017
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Where should a dog go when it has lost its tail?

The retail store

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/eternalrocket
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2017
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Where do animals go when their tails fall off?

The retail store

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/i-right-i
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2017
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Where does the dog go when he loses his tail?

The retail store

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πŸ‘€︎ u/evan164
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2016
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"Where do animals who have no tails go?"

The retail store.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rljkeimig
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2015
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