I don't get how it's possible to reduce the social distancing requirement from six feet to three feet.
In almost all cases its impossible to have three feet between 2 people.
Our Tea Company only allows men in the quality control department. It is a requirement,
I asked my wife, “Did you know there’s a fruit that gives you your entire potassium requirement for the day?”
My wife: That’s bananas.
Me: I know, I couldn’t believe it either.
What are the requirements to work in marine biology?
Your grades need to be above C-level
Army soldiers can't comprehend the 6-foot social distancing requirement.
But everyone in the Navy can fathom it.
I tried to join a secret religious society, but the requirements were very strict.
It was called Diffi cult.
I'm no longer afraid to say what I really think of roller coaster height requirements.
Job requirements are hire standards
I went to Cole's this morning to buy cabbage, apparently its a legal requirement for me to also purchase carrots and mayonnaise when purchasing cabbage.
[Meta] the ancestry of this sub
these are all real. Some are made by me, some are not (ones with an "*" are mine.).
/r/NoPuns is a sub where posting puns will get you a ban.
/r/NoNoPuns is a sub for people banned from /r/NoPuns.
/r/NoNoNoPuns is a sub for people who weren't. *
/r/NoNoNoNoPuns is a sub where puns are mandatory.
/r/NoNoNoNoNoPuns is a sub where requiring puns is banned. *
A good pun is like a good cake: it has many layers. Subreddits are the same.
If you wear glasses and have been required to wear a mask during the COVID pandemic, you may be entitled to condensation.
My daughter goes to a school that requires a uniform. Occasionally, the administration will reward the children with a free dress day.
For some reason, my daughter never comes home with her free dress...???
Becoming a sushi chef requires a lot of physics.
How else will you learn fission.
I'm planning to implement a new weight-loss method that will require people to wear winter gloves making it harder for them to eat.
I will call it "Inter-mitten fasting".
My new job at the nuclear reactor requires me to take anger management classes.
They're to prevent meltdowns.
What city in the Middle East doesn't require you to wear a face mask?
The password is password1. It requires letters AND numbers.
Buying a box of Duraflame logs always requires a little thought...
I have to decide if I have $20 to burn.
Did you hear about the kidnapping at the school?
Did you know cutlery scams require the most patience?
You've got to play the long prong
Here, a license is required for a forklift
Guess I need to switch to chopsticks.
A good pun requires periodic timing
A King Fisher. More of a visual pun that requires knowledge on birds. Photoshopped myself
Mandatory temperature screening will be required for fans attending the Foreigner reunion concert.
If you’re hot blooded, they’ll check it and see.
Son: By law, you are actually required to turn on your headlights if if is raining in Sweden
Dad: Okay, but how the hell do I know if it’s raining in Sweden?
A meteorology student did research on the necessity of temperature change when he was in college.
It was a degree requirement.
My Vet said our puppy requires supervision at all times.
I told him that I would be happy to consider LASIK, but wondered how it would help us potty train him?
Parking a single car doesn't need much space...
But parking 200 cars, now that requires a lot.
Why didn't the Justice League accept the Adobe Sponsorship?
Because it would have required them to kill Flash.
Getting a Roman soldier to stand next to an Irishman ...
... requires a lot of Gaul.
A jazz guitarist couldn’t play a gig at a venue that had only six electrical receptacles.
His equipment required a seventh cord.
What’s the difference between bird flu and swine flu?
One requires tweetment and the other requires oinkment.
No one will ever make a successful video game about running a coffee shop.
Gamers would never put up with the amount of grinding required.
I got fired from my job at TGI Fridays.
At the meeting they told me 2 things;
1: in here, its always Friday
2: I am no longer required to work Fridays.
Modern problems require modern solutions.
Germany is now requiring people to stock up cheese and sausages due to COVID-19.
This is called the Wurst-Käse Scenario.
Modern problems require Indian solutions
A cable repairman was on our street today and asked what time it is.
I told him it's between 8am and 1pm.
ENTER A NEW PASSWORD “chicken” THE PASSWORD REQUIRES A CAPITAL!!!
The World Health Organization has said that dogs cannot get COVID19, so they have said dogs are not required to be in quarantine.
So, WHO let the dogs out.
I was required to add flair to this, True story not a flairy tail
Picture this: A pandemic is unleashed by ticks that live on and around the mouths of alpacas.
Global chaos ensues.
The disease wipes out 99% of humanity, and the desperate survivors are forced to live in a post-alpaca lip tick wasteland.
Are you required to wear a face mask and wear glasses?
You may be eligible for condensation.
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