What do you call a relationship between two Jedi?
π︎ 35
π
︎ May 12 2021
Why should you never be in a relationship with a tree?
You'll regret it in autumn when it leaves
π︎ 5
π
︎ May 11 2021
I'm in intimate relationships with several Spanish women.
I put the "amor" in "polyamory".
π︎ 10
π
︎ Apr 29 2021
In our relationship I make sparks fly everyday
I run my wet hands over electrical outlets!
Credit to the young guy busting out one-liners to his girlfriend on the Central Line the other day.
π︎ 2
π
︎ May 17 2021
Relationships between hockey π players and figure skaters are always doomed to failure.
No one is willing to break the ice.
π︎ 23
π
︎ Apr 26 2021
Relationships are like fat people....
Most of them don't work out.
π︎ 20
π
︎ Mar 07 2021
GF- βWhy do we need walkie-talkies? Our relationship is over.β
BF- β Our relationship is what? Over.β
π︎ 10k
π
︎ Aug 12 2020
A couple gets exposed to radiation at Chernobyl, call that a toxic relationship
π︎ 10
π
︎ Feb 16 2021
What do you call an IT teacher who has an inappropriate relationship with a student?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Feb 05 2021
I've always had a difficult relationship with my parents.
When I was first born, I didn't speak to them for 2 years.
π︎ 46
π
︎ Jan 01 2021
I started reading this great book about the relationship between military battles and green vegetables.
Itβs called War and Peas.
π︎ 10
π
︎ Feb 06 2021
My relationship with the woman I met bungee jumping didn't last long.
As we were both on the rebound.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jan 22 2021
I've just ended a 15 year relationship...
Good thing it wasn't mine.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Feb 12 2021
My 16 year old son told me I was a simp (probably because I'm looking to get into a new relationship), after I looked up the meaning I told him:
You must be a Simpson then.
π︎ 481
π
︎ Aug 13 2020
What is the Sorting Hatβs favourite relationship advice?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jan 23 2021
My sister had a baby, she hopes itβll save the relationship...
But I still donβt talk to her
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jan 31 2021
A real relationship
π︎ 19
π
︎ Oct 04 2020
A recipe for a good relationship
My wife and daughter are working on improving the meringue cookie recipe they are using.
I asked if the batter was better and my wife said yes.
So I asked if it had enough sugar or if it was a bitter better batter.
The look on her face was priceless!
I reminded her that she knew my sense of humor before she married me and went through with it anyway.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Nov 30 2020
What did the pasta send to the other pasta to spice up their relationship?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Nov 26 2020
I made a graph for my past relationships.
It has an ex-axis and a why-axis.
π︎ 10k
π
︎ Jan 04 2020
My last relationship ended because I didn't open the car door for her...
Instead I swam up to the surface.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Dec 08 2020
Two meth heads start a relationship, is that considered speed dating
π︎ 8k
π
︎ Nov 25 2019
What relationship advice did the snail give to itβs friend?
π︎ 4
π
︎ Oct 29 2020
Start of a rocky relationship
π︎ 5k
π
︎ Nov 04 2019
When in a new relationship, does your stomach hurt because of the butterflies...
Or the farts you hold in.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Nov 30 2020
My wife left me because we have a rocky relationship.
I guess I took her for granite.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Aug 29 2020
I'm in a very serious relationship with my girlfriend.
Haven't laughed in two years.
π︎ 106
π
︎ Aug 28 2020
The most stable relationship I have is with my bed
Because it stands on four legs.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Sep 26 2020
Relationship Goals
https://preview.redd.it/t38hnjzkpbm51.png?width=700&format=png&auto=webp&s=28434df6a6f812bf907f286d6f2eec8933feae24
π︎ 8
π
︎ Sep 10 2020
My wife said that our relationship is like a holiday.
No, wait, thatβs not it. She said it was her last resort.
π︎ 45
π
︎ Aug 23 2020
What's the relationship between Octopi and Pens?
They have a lot ink-common.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Oct 24 2020
Relationship problems
π︎ 27
π
︎ Jul 28 2020
Blood relationship
π︎ 62
π
︎ Feb 12 2020
I wonder how I didnβt know me and my girlfriendβs relationship was coming to a stop
π︎ 4
π
︎ Oct 13 2020
Compatibility is key to a relationship
π︎ 28
π
︎ May 05 2020
I used to be in a relationship with a person who made edible stickers for a living.
We had to part ways though, they were getting too clingy for my tastes.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Sep 09 2020
When a new relationship pops up overnight
π︎ 21
π
︎ Mar 29 2020
Friend 1: So howβs your long distance relationship going?
Friend 2: So far, so good
π︎ 30
π
︎ Jul 03 2020
I once had a relationship with a woman who lived on the houseboat next to mine
but sadly we drifted apart.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Jun 26 2020
Taller the guy, longer the relationship
π︎ 34
π
︎ Feb 04 2020
What do you call two horses in a relationship?
A stable relationship π
π︎ 26
π
︎ Feb 04 2021
I just ended a 5 year old relationship.
Good thing it wasn't mine.
π︎ 14
π
︎ Dec 05 2020
My relationship isn't stable.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Nov 27 2020
She: Our relationship is over
He: Our relationship is what........ Over
π︎ 4
π
︎ Aug 26 2020
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