I'm in intimate relationships with several Spanish women.

I put the "amor" in "polyamory".

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/incredibleinkpen
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2021
🚨︎ report
Relationships between hockey πŸ’ players and figure skaters are always doomed to failure.

No one is willing to break the ice.

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fladavpam
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call two horses in a relationship?

A stable relationship 🐎

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/manzff
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2021
🚨︎ report
Relationships are like fat people....

Most of them don't work out.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2021
🚨︎ report
A couple gets exposed to radiation at Chernobyl, call that a toxic relationship
πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/laclotaclo
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2021
🚨︎ report
GF- β€œWhy do we need walkie-talkies? Our relationship is over.”

BF- β€œ Our relationship is what? Over.”

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/syniss
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call an IT teacher who has an inappropriate relationship with a student?

A pdf-file

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kabocha00sama
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2021
🚨︎ report
I've always had a difficult relationship with my parents.

When I was first born, I didn't speak to them for 2 years.

πŸ‘︎ 46
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2021
🚨︎ report
I started reading this great book about the relationship between military battles and green vegetables.

It’s called War and Peas.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Calm_Fan_381
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2021
🚨︎ report
I've just ended a 15 year relationship...

Good thing it wasn't mine.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2021
🚨︎ report
My relationship with the woman I met bungee jumping didn't last long.

As we were both on the rebound.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2021
🚨︎ report
What is the Sorting Hat’s favourite relationship advice?

Slytherin.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FredererPower
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2021
🚨︎ report
My sister had a baby, she hopes it’ll save the relationship...

But I still don’t talk to her

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/frozeneskimo02
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2021
🚨︎ report
My 16 year old son told me I was a simp (probably because I'm looking to get into a new relationship), after I looked up the meaning I told him:

You must be a Simpson then.

πŸ‘︎ 485
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HosfordHusky
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2020
🚨︎ report
A recipe for a good relationship

My wife and daughter are working on improving the meringue cookie recipe they are using.

I asked if the batter was better and my wife said yes.

So I asked if it had enough sugar or if it was a bitter better batter.

The look on her face was priceless!

I reminded her that she knew my sense of humor before she married me and went through with it anyway.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MikeyRidesABikey
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2020
🚨︎ report
A real relationship
πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Luiiiis_
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the pasta send to the other pasta to spice up their relationship?

Nudeles

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/suckmymeatballs
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I made a graph for my past relationships.

It has an ex-axis and a why-axis.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Not_donald-trump
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2020
🚨︎ report
My last relationship ended because I didn't open the car door for her...

Instead I swam up to the surface.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2020
🚨︎ report
What relationship advice did the snail give to it’s friend?

Take it slow.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ConradFlick
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
🚨︎ report
When in a new relationship, does your stomach hurt because of the butterflies...

Or the farts you hold in.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Two meth heads start a relationship, is that considered speed dating

or just mething around?

πŸ‘︎ 8k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/skol_vkings
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Start of a rocky relationship
πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/eyeyamstewpig
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife left me because we have a rocky relationship.

I guess I took her for granite.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RevSquirrel
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2020
🚨︎ report
The most stable relationship I have is with my bed

Because it stands on four legs.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ScoutyHUN
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I'm in a very serious relationship with my girlfriend.

Haven't laughed in two years.

πŸ‘︎ 111
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ltsNotAlex
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Relationship Goals

https://preview.redd.it/t38hnjzkpbm51.png?width=700&format=png&auto=webp&s=28434df6a6f812bf907f286d6f2eec8933feae24

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ineedapapaya
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife said that our relationship is like a holiday.

No, wait, that’s not it. She said it was her last resort.

πŸ‘︎ 43
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rugsby84
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the relationship between Octopi and Pens?

They have a lot ink-common.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Relationship problems
πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/xJoey23
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
🚨︎ report
I wonder how I didn’t know me and my girlfriend’s relationship was coming to a stop

All the signs were there

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sir_swankington
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Blood relationship
πŸ‘︎ 59
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HauntingH
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Compatibility is key to a relationship
πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/prabeshdai13
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2020
🚨︎ report
I used to be in a relationship with a person who made edible stickers for a living.

We had to part ways though, they were getting too clingy for my tastes.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/IAmHere420
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Friend 1: So how’s your long distance relationship going?

Friend 2: So far, so good

πŸ‘︎ 33
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/twistyturtles
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2020
🚨︎ report
When a new relationship pops up overnight
πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdouglass
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2020
🚨︎ report
I once had a relationship with a woman who lived on the houseboat next to mine

but sadly we drifted apart.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
🚨︎ report
It was a rocky relationship
πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/punnybeings
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Taller the guy, longer the relationship
πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LogangYeddu
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Relationships are a lot like algebra....

You look at your X and wonder Y.

πŸ‘︎ 104
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ElderHallow
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Me and my mother-in-law's relationship in a nut shell.
πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/usdsquare
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I just ended a 5 year old relationship.

Good thing it wasn't mine.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
🚨︎ report
My relationship isn't stable.

But my horses are.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Phenicutie
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
🚨︎ report
She: Our relationship is over

He: Our relationship is what........ Over

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/popcorn_21
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2020
🚨︎ report

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