I love my recliner.

We go back a long way.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/justbeatitTTD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
🚨︎ report
I hooked a stereo up to my recliner.

Now it's a rocking chair.

πŸ‘︎ 41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DestroyatronMk8
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
🚨︎ report
You know why I don’t eat Lazy-Boy recliners?

I don’t like chairy flavored food.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tkseizetheday
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Congratulate us - my wife and I just bought our first pair of recliners!

Sit just got REAL!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Naitraen
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a couch potato sitting in a recliner?

A vege***chair***ian

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/stickmanofdoom
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Back in the day before recliners were invented..

.. People weren't very laid back.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gubafett
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2019
🚨︎ report
I dont really have that many friends...

But me and my recliner go way back.

πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Invader_Kilz
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2021
🚨︎ report
When I was in the army, our captain told us to dress as water dwelling birds, make quaking noises and just recline lazily in order to blend into the environment. But I doubted how effective that would be.

I was sure we’d be sitting ducks.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kiwicanary
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2019
🚨︎ report
You know, I just bought this new recliner

I just can't wait to chair it with you

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FurriesRGay14
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2018
🚨︎ report
I just bought a sofa that can fold out or recline.

I guess that makes it bi-sectional.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Reefay
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2018
🚨︎ report
I bought two recliners on Craigslist today

I went with a friend to pick them up. When we got back, my dad comes out and says "Hey, two lazy boys! Oh and you got some recliners too."

πŸ‘︎ 257
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πŸ‘€︎ u/joejoey22
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2015
🚨︎ report
Switching things up a bit, today.

Going to sit on the television and watch the recliner

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MagicGuy66
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2021
🚨︎ report
I was sitting in my dad's recliner when he came home.

He says to my mom "Honey, did rocky(our dog) crap in my chair?" " WHAT?! No. Why?" " because there's a turd in it"

Commence 15 minutes of laughter.

πŸ‘︎ 238
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jabman96
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2013
🚨︎ report
My mom is giving my husband and I her very large recliner...

Husband: Where are we going to put it? Me: In the house. Husband: Where in the house? Me: On the floor.

Then I gave him a super cheesy grin and a thumbs up.

πŸ‘︎ 79
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Aimless_Creation
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2014
🚨︎ report
Itsy Bitsy Spider β€” Dad version

Use this nursery rhyme to play "scary/gross monster" with your tyke:

"The itsy bitsy spider climbed into Mia's mouth
Down to her ears and crawling in and out!
Out through her nose and tickled with her legs,
She made Mia sneeze her brains to scrambled eggs!

achoo splat bleah"

Substitute $name for Mia.

Spider hand chases while Dad reclines on bed. Tyke busily baits and counterattacks.

I dunno whether this qualifies as a Dad joke, but my wife hated it until she saw how much my daughter liked it. I feel like that fits the spirit of Dadness. For maximum results, send your wife the poem first.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LeoLittlebook
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Man, I gotta say... I really love my furniture

Me and my recliner go way back

πŸ‘︎ 56
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_joshi_
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2020
🚨︎ report
My son walked into the living room only to find me looking around all misty eyed. Reluctantly, he asked, "What's up pop?" I blubbered, "My boy, I really love our furniture..."

"Me and my recliner go way back."

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Best laugh I’ve had in a long time.

So my dog was barking at something outside and I was chilling in my recliner. I called her over to me, looked her dead in the eyes and told her she has barkinson’s disease. I then burst out in laughter almost falling out of my chair.

πŸ‘︎ 98
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shredhead15
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2019
🚨︎ report
I'm headed home to do some mechanic work.

I'm putting a rear end in my recliner.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JibJabJake
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2018
🚨︎ report
Not a dad yet, but I'm training.

Telling my friends that my backseats recline.

"Hey you can lean back your chair... If you feel so inclined"

There was silence.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Blue_Ranger_488
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2015
🚨︎ report
Brightening my BF's recovery from surgery with Dad Jokes

Background: My boyfriend is stuck on crutches after having hip surgery and likes to sit in the recliner with his legs propped up. Since he can't move his hips, I have to lower the footrest for him to get out of the chair.

Him: Can you put my feet down so I can go relax in the bed for a while?

Me: Feet, you're stupid and useless and no one likes you!

Him giving me silence with a side of contempt while I cackle.

Laughter is the best medicine...

πŸ‘︎ 51
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HuskeyG
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2014
🚨︎ report
Suggestion box

I've asked my dad for a couple of changes around the house lately. After I mentioned something else today, I remarked that our family could use a suggestion box, but then said that I realized it would quickly be full of requests for La-Z-Boy recliners.

Dad replies: "But we've already got our own full-sized lazy boy!" and of course starts laughing as if he were the funniest dad ever.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/reddude7
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2016
🚨︎ report
My recliner and I go way back.
πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ccarron16
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2017
🚨︎ report
I love my furniture...

Me and my recliner go way back.

πŸ‘︎ 303
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2021
🚨︎ report
I have a great relationship with my recliner

We go way back

πŸ‘︎ 55
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2018
🚨︎ report
I love my furniture...

Me and my recliner go way back.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2021
🚨︎ report
Man, I really love my furniture...

...me and my recliner go way back.

πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mkay1911
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2017
🚨︎ report
Man, I really love my furniture.

Me and my recliner go way back

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/baguettesniper
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2020
🚨︎ report
My furniture and I are really close

My recliner and I go way back.

πŸ‘︎ 95
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GamerDad87
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Man, I really love my furniture...

Me and my recliner go way back!

πŸ‘︎ 30
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Tanmaythegr8
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2019
🚨︎ report
I love my furniture

Me and my recliner go wayyy back.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/h934se65
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2019
🚨︎ report
My furniture and I are really close.

Me and my recliner go way back.

πŸ‘︎ 59
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wildjesta
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Man, I really love my furniture

Me and my recliner go waaaaaay back

πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CulturedGrass
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Man I love my furniture.

Me and my recliner go WAY back

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iateaps4
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Man I love my furniture

Me and my recliner go way back

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SideOfInsanity
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Man, I really love my furniture

Me and my recliner go way back

πŸ‘︎ 38
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/officialmrkiller
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Man I really love my furniture

Me and the recliner go way back

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/huhmanrawx
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2019
🚨︎ report
I love my furniture

Me and my recliner go way back

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Yourmomsbiggay
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Man I really love my furniture

Me and my recliner go way back.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/IrishBoxingLife
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2019
🚨︎ report
Man, I love my furniture....

Me and my recliner go way back.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/avianthon
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Man, I love my furniture

Me and my recliner go way back

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GamingGod07770
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2019
🚨︎ report
I really love my furniture...

Me and my recliner go way back...

πŸ‘︎ 102
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2017
🚨︎ report
Kids, you know I really love my furniture...

Me and my recliner go way back...

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2017
🚨︎ report

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