Mother-in-law is in Prison. Need a good prison pun for Mothers Day Card.
So the hardest part is it has to be uplifting/cute like all the other mothers day cards, can't just be a simple jail/robber pun.
So far I got:
You're ex-cell-ent mom!
I'd break into a maximom security prison for you!
Hope your mothers day is on point! (with a diagram of a shank)
^((But they're kind of trash))
Ideas from others:
Most people have a mother-in-law but I get to have a mother-outlaw! u/tcbst15
π︎ 3
π
︎ May 02 2019
Was driving by the prison the other night when I saw a midget climbing down from a window.
I said to myself, thatβs a little condescending
π︎ 114
π
︎ Dec 26 2020
What do you call a fortune telling midget who just escaped from prison?
π︎ 20
π
︎ Jan 11 2021
I have a twin brother in prison
We finish each other's sentences.
π︎ 30
π
︎ Jan 11 2021
A cement mixer and a prison bus crashed on the highway...
Police advise citizens to be on the lookout for a group of hardened criminals!
π︎ 206
π
︎ Nov 22 2020
Authorities are searching for a four-foot tall woman who recently escaped from prison in upstate New York. She was serving a five year sentence for fraud after convincing a number of victims that she was a powerful psychic.
Now she's a small medium at large.
π︎ 77
π
︎ Nov 25 2020
Why is it a good idea to put more books in prison libraries?
Because the prose outweigh the cons.
π︎ 208
π
︎ Oct 23 2020
Do you have any idea what they do to eggs in prison?
I'll tell you thisβ It ain't over easy.
π︎ 64
π
︎ Oct 01 2020
Just got offered a job teaching poetry in prison.
Spent all night thinking about the prose and cons.
π︎ 224
π
︎ Sep 12 2020
The person who had once kidnapped me got released after serving 10 years in prison. Since then, I secretly follow him to his house every single day without his knowledge.
I guess I'm suffering from 'stalk home' syndrome.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Dec 03 2020
The man was finally about to escape prison when he realised he forgot something. He ran back and grabbed acne cream. Why?
π︎ 7
π
︎ Nov 02 2020
I just heard on the news, Adele has been sent to prison for 8 years
She was charged for setting fire to Lorraine
π︎ 6
π
︎ Nov 27 2020
How did the space criminal escape from the prison planet?
He achieved ESCAPE VELOCITY
π︎ 2
π
︎ Dec 01 2020
Today I saw a dwarf climbing down a prison wall.
I thought to myself, βThatβs a little condescending.β
π︎ 325
π
︎ Aug 05 2020
The Government Accidentally Built A Prison Outside My Home,
I Guess You Could Say I'm Under House Arrest.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Nov 17 2020
Did you hear about the Beever that was sent to prison.
The evidence against him was damming.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Sep 22 2020
The prison fundraising boxing tournament was on again off again
The warden had to weigh the pros and cons
π︎ 6
π
︎ Nov 01 2020
I sent my daughter to prison because she didn't want to sleep
π︎ 32
π
︎ Oct 10 2020
A rich man who got sent to jail decided to pay to upgrade his prison cell.
He is now behind gold bars.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Oct 01 2020
Why are female prisoners kept in separate prisons?
Because most prisoners are in cells.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Sep 22 2020
In the history of crime literature, which character has been the most effective at getting people out of prison?
The dot "."
It has ended more sentences than anything else.
π︎ 11
π
︎ Sep 28 2020
A midget escaped from prison by using bed sheets tied together and scaled down the outside wall. He left a note detailing his escape plan, highlighting the prison guards stupidity and incompetence.
The Warden said "he's a little condescending"
π︎ 14
π
︎ Oct 03 2020
A man called his twin brother from prison
βHey remember when we were kids and use to finish each otherβs sentences?β
π︎ 5k
π
︎ Mar 03 2020
Prison Humor
π︎ 109
π
︎ Jul 31 2020
Found a old jukebox in prison...
It was full of criminal records.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Sep 12 2020
A psychic dwarf broke out of prison the other day, what did the headlines say?
Thereβs small medium at large
π︎ 58
π
︎ Aug 03 2020
What is it called when you get sent to a prison made of only two elements?
π︎ 6
π
︎ Sep 06 2020
A man was sentenced to 20 years in prison when he inadvertently contaminated the food supply of 30 specimens of Americaβs national bird.
His actions were highly ill-eagle
π︎ 10
π
︎ Sep 23 2020
What do you call a fish that is in prison?
π︎ 12
π
︎ Sep 13 2020
My brother, who stutters alot, went to prison...
Its a shame that he wonβt finish his sentence
π︎ 52
π
︎ Aug 19 2020
After years of being in jail, Lance, a reporter was released from prison.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Aug 11 2020
Why does working at a prison suck?
Because it's full of cons.
π︎ 14
π
︎ Aug 06 2020
i got a prison sentence
i don't remember what it said.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Aug 21 2020
How did Hitler write Mien Kampf while in prison?
π︎ 17
π
︎ Jul 22 2020
I watched a dwarf escape from prison today. As he climbed down the fence, he smirked at me.
I thought to myself, "Hmmm, that's a little condescending."
π︎ 89
π
︎ May 06 2020
An alcoholic wakes up in prison
He asks the first police officer he sees, "Why am I here?"
"For drinking," replies the officer.
"Great," says the man, "when do we start?"
π︎ 46
π
︎ Jul 28 2020
Did you see the headline about the psychic midget who escaped from prison???
π︎ 6
π
︎ Dec 21 2020
I saw a midget climbing down the prison wall the other day
It was a little condescending
π︎ 90
π
︎ Sep 19 2020
The man was finally about to escape prison when he realised he forgot something. He ran back and grabbed acne cream. Why?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Oct 28 2020
I saw a dwarf climbing down a prison wall today...
I thought that was a little condescending
π︎ 2
π
︎ Sep 30 2020
I saw a dwarf climbing down a prison wall.
Thought to myself, βthatβs a little condescendingβ.
π︎ 27
π
︎ Aug 09 2020
Going to prison..
π︎ 9
π
︎ Sep 19 2020
Today I saw a dwarf climbing down a prison wall.
I thought to myself, "That's a little condescending."
π︎ 56
π
︎ Aug 09 2020
I just saw a dwarf climbing down the wall of a prison.
I thought to myself... βthatβs a little condescendingβ.
π︎ 15
π
︎ Aug 06 2020
What do you call a psychic dwarf that escaped from prison?
π︎ 109
π
︎ May 24 2020
Did you here about the dwarf climbing over the wall to escape prison?
He fell!
It was a little condescending.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Aug 28 2020
A dwarf clairvoyant just escaped prison
Police say there is a small medium at large
π︎ 6
π
︎ Aug 18 2020
What do you call a three foot psychic that escaped prison ?
π︎ 95
π
︎ Jun 19 2020
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
