What do you call an Irish possum?

O'Possum.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RonPalancik
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2021
🚨︎ report
Tonight I’m gonna have possum soup made from Himalayan possum...

Because I found Himalayan on the road.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dennyitlo
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the difference between a Possum and an Opossum?

The Opossum is Irish.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Oafah
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Hey look there's a possum in the store!

"i don't see him, where?"

-he's right THERE.

"I still can't see him, must be... playing possum."

...other dad walking out with his kid cracks a smile.

I've made it boys. I'm a dad now. This isn't my best, but it was recognized by the international father brotherhood.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NobleBytes
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2019
🚨︎ report
A group of possum played dead in my yard last night

They did a great version of β€˜Truckin’

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SallyMaeBigly
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2019
🚨︎ report
Saw a possum on the road while driving to the store this evening.

He was still there on the return trip. He was quite deadicated.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mikemol
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2012
🚨︎ report
My dad asked me if I had ever had Himalayan possum before...

I asked him what Himalayan possum was and he said, "Oh you know, it's the kind of possum you find on the road and him a laying there."

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/keehcyma
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2016
🚨︎ report
What kind of possums roll the best?

O-possums.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/musiquexcoeur
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2017
🚨︎ report
Grandpa's possum joke

"You know why possums hang upside down? It makes it easier for them to clean out their pouches."

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/justkayla
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2013
🚨︎ report
Went on a trek on time..

Down south in the backwoods. Along my way I met a friendly family that took me in for the night. Despite being impoverished they insisted that I stay the night and have dinner.

When we had dinner it seemed they were serving a kind of stew. Quite aromatic. I asked them what it was and the reply I got was β€œIt’s Ma’s Soup Y’all.” I shrugged my shoulders and started to eat. The food was good of course but the meat was quite gamey. So I asked what type of meat it was?

β€˜Possum.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dyspaereunia
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2021
🚨︎ report
I know what the Redskins new name will be.

The Possums. The play dead at home and get killed on the road.

πŸ‘︎ 40
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mycorona69
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What animal is known for its paws?

A possum.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2020
🚨︎ report
You can't have Molasses...

...until you've had some lasses

Just wanted to say that this dad joke has been passed down through four generations of dads, me being the fifth once I have a kid.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ThePinkWombat
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2017
🚨︎ report
Genetic Engineering...

Did you see the headline that Genetic Engineers are experimenting with odd combinations of animals in order to come up with new species? This article was talking about people trying to combine a bull with a possum.
While the scientific community is responding with skepticism, I think it's a possum-bull.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/natebraun1
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2018
🚨︎ report
A vulture at the airport

Last week I was flying home from a business trip out of Dallas/Ft. Worth. I'm in line waiting to board and in front of me is a vulture. He's dragging a squirrel carcass behind him in one hand and a dead possum in the other. The line is moving pretty quick until the vulture gets to the ramp and winds up in an argument with the guy scanning tickets. The attendant at the gate says to the vulture, "sir, you are only permitted one piece of carrion."

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AllUrMemes
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2017
🚨︎ report
Not a dad, but my new SO has a 4 yr old. I think I'm starting off on the right foot. (OC)

driving down road and almost hit a possum GF: I thought you were gonna hit that. Me: Me too! It was definitely a "possum-bility."

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/skiton28
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2017
🚨︎ report
I was driving alone on the road the other day and passed a dead animal.

I slowly shook my head and said "Ohhhhhh........Possum....."

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/guitarman1103
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2018
🚨︎ report
Driving to work this morning

My son and I are driving to work this morning. See something squished on the road ahead.

Son: What is that?

Son: A possum?

Me: Possum-bly...

Son: ...

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cabinetguy
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2015
🚨︎ report
Dad Joked by my grandfather.

We were driving on an old country road and we passed by a possum that had been obliterated by a car. My grandfather studied the roadkill carnage carefully before telling me, "Well...that possum will never have the guts to try and cross the road again."

second generation dad joked >.<

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tiridawn
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2015
🚨︎ report
Tonight I'm gonna have possum soup made from Himalayan Possum,

Because I found Himalayan on the road.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Twigsnapper
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Tonight I'm gonna have Himalayan possum soup

Because I found Himalayan on the road

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Himalayan possum soup

I found Himalayan in the road.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SaltShaker1_
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2019
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.