What is a baby badger called?
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 04
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I tried giving a badger two different types of pet food, but he couldn't decide which to eat.

Apparently badgers can't be choosers.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bigfoothobbit
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05
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If you get a dachshund for badgers, a beagle for rabbits, and a lab for ducks, what kind of dog do you get for play?

A plott hound

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2019
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Discussing badgers with a British co-worker..

Me: "I honestly don't think I've ever seen one in my life; maybe I have but just didn't know."

Co-worker: "Really? I think I've seen quite a few."

Me: "Yeah. Oh, so they're big in the UK then..?"

Co-worker: "Not really, they're the same size all over the world usually."

cue awkward silence before he kills himself laughing...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mowjowey
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2014
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It’s a big college fan
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sponge_Guy
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2019
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What do you say to an annoying Hufflepuff?

Stop badgering me

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2019
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Proud to be punny 🀘🏻
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πŸ“…︎ May 16 2018
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What medal did the weasel war hero receive?

A badger of honor.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jackovias
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2019
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There was once a mole who loved oranges...

However, the mole couldn't reach them from the high trees and he struggled to climb them. Luckily, there was a tall giraffe who offered to help and got the oranges down for the mole.

The mole would go up to the giraffe every morning and ask him for some oranges. The giraffe would happily oblige but little by little he would get more irritated. One day, the giraffe finally got mad and told the mole to see the badger who could make a tool to help him get the oranges down from the tree.

The mole trundled over to the badger and asked him to make him a tool to help with the orange problem. The badger happily agreed to help and went into his shed. For a few days after: cutting, grinding and sawing could be heard coming from his shed when he finally emerged with a 4-pointed tool. He then proceeded to demonstrate the 4-point tool by sticking it into an orange and allowing the juice from which to drain down the arm of the tool.

The mole was extremely happy and excited by his new magnificen

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/alecroc
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2018
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Every time we play Ohio State

My dad and i are Wisconsin Badger fans and I swear every time UW plays Ohio State my dad says this joke about their coach: "Urban Meyer...did you know his brother, Rural Meyer?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pawlije
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2013
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While driving home with my mum.

I saw a dead animal at the side of the road but I couldn't tell quite what it was because it looked like a brown bushy dog. So, I asked my mum "what was that" and she told me that it was a badger.

After that she then told me "I was gonna say it's dead". Should've really followed through with the joke.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tkeign
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2017
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Looks like I'm ready for parenthood

I'm a part time clerk/grunt worker at my local supermarket. My shift consists of stacking up milk, butter, eggs, cream, anything that comes from an udder. So, to make my existence seem less monotonous, I'll often badger my coworkers with horrid puns. One day,one of them offered me these kind words of encouragement: "If you don't shut up, I'll shove my foot down your throat." My rebuttal: "Is that what people call sole food?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nunc-Est-Bibendum
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2013
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