RATTUS RATTUS: Anyone got any good rat puns?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gbeats24
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2014
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He's not a rat... He'll never give you up
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πŸ‘€︎ u/freakynit
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2021
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A group of geese is a gaggle, agroup of rats: a mischief, a murder of crows, bats a colony and men a crowd. What's a group of batmen?

An orphanage.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jayjay3078
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2021
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I had so many rats for the science experiment, I had to assign them letters of the alphabet.

One of them protested, but he was just being a B rat.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/The-Clever-Idiot
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2021
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There’s a rat in the Italian mafia

An impasta

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ExExtrovert
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2021
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My dad saw an ad for game with heavily armed animals. He asked me what they gave the naked mole rats.

I told him stealth gear and a go bag. He is an exposed double agent.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chiefmudbear
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2021
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Rats are underrated...

...according to the dictionary.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2020
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What would C.S.Lewis write if he was a Rat?

The Chronicles of Gnaw-rnia...

Hehe..

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Albus_Veritas
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
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rat pack:
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πŸ‘€︎ u/explosive_toaster
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2020
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What kind of car insurance does a rat have?

Road Dent Insurance .

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gawd_of_oh_Lawd
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2020
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I hit a rat with my car today

It left a ro-dent

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fireballinc55
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2020
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Seems weird that rats have 12 nipples

Dozen tit?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zsm1994
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2020
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The leading cause of cancer in lab rats

Research scientists

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lfantine
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2020
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Pi-rats
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thebestdogeevr
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2019
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Rats are under rated.

Just check your dictionary.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/phillydog1
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2019
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What did the rat say when he saw a bat?

β€œOh my!! I just saw an angel!!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2019
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What do you call a rat that lost its leg?

A pi-rat

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hellzdoms
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2018
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I was dating a gym rat.

We didn’t work out.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/warmLuke0
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2019
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A boy had a pet rat, which was sick. But the boy didn't tell his family

He decided to keep a secret

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrCopper23
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2018
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Funny name for a Rat character in D&D?

I made a rat character who managed to lose his name, and now I have to find a new one. I was hoping /r/puns could help me make my DM facepalm.

Helpful information: Is aquatic (half-fish) Stole the core out of a water elemental once. Accidentally killed a dragon. Original alias: Mega Rat.

I know there's a joke in here somewhere, I just can't find it. Thanks for any help!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/markdeedavis
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2015
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How many rats Does it Take to Screw in a light bulb?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Teachdis
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2018
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My sister's pet rat died of cancer and my dad tried to cheer her up

Dad: Don't be sad, he lived a pretty swell life didn't he?

Sister: (in tears) shutup dad you're not funny

Dad: You just don't have a sense of tumor do you?

Took a while before my sister calmed down after that, while my dad laughed his ass off.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/grasisgroen
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2013
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Which song did the brave rat loved singing to his grandchildren ?

"I fought the claw, and the claw won, I fought the claw, and the claw won !"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/music_snobbbb
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2018
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I wonder how rats fall for rat traps

It's a cheesy setup

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πŸ‘€︎ u/itsroman98
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2016
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Do you know what we call twin rats?

Ratatouille's

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chazmer87
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2016
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So we got two rats for my little sister and my dad wanted to name them.

He called the first one 'rata-one-ee' and the other 'Ratatouille'

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Smeagol260
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2014
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