The police department made all homicide detectives stay under quarantine for two weeks.

>!They had coroner-virus.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RealTheAsh
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the police detective with the secret clamp collection?

He had a vice vise vice.

It helped him put the squeeze on suspects.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ProjectMeat
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get grammar police for making detective?

A posh trophy case.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/themakeshfitman
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2018
🚨︎ report
A store clerk fought off an armed robber with a labeling gun

Now police are looking for a man with a price on his head.

πŸ‘︎ 620
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fireseeker4him
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2020
🚨︎ report
In recent news, a giant had a troubling discovery when he returned home from work.

After discovering he'd been given a parking ticket, the giant exclaimed in disappointment as he approached his house. This startled a burglar inside, causing him to flee from the property but not before trapping his stubby digit in the door, causing him to leave blood at the scene. Thankfully, the giant's powerful nasal abilities allowed him to aid police as he was able to detected the exact nationality and gender of the robber in question. When interviewed, the giant simplified the story for us by saying,

"Fee, Fie, Foe, Thumb, I smell the blood of an English Man."

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wolfyfancylads
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I used to randomly sort resumes into 2 piles. One of the piles I'd throw out. The ones in the remaining were lucky enough to go to step 2.

I guess I wasn't much of a police detective.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2019
🚨︎ report
A murder happened at a local grocery store...

When the police showed up, everything was in disarray. Employees were panicked. Family members were present, and crying. The lead detective approached the scene of the crime to see what happened. Milk was spilled all over the floor, and spoons were scattered everywhere. The detective spoke after a moment of thinking and said, β€œThis appears to be the work of a cereal killer.”

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Wolff_X
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2019
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.