In Ancient Rome, there were 4 types of poison. Poisons I, II, and III would all kill you with varying degrees of pain.

However, Poison IV would just make you really itchy.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 340
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jigsatics
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 12 2021
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What do you get when you mix a four-leaf clover with poison ivy?

A rash of good luck.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jigsatics
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 05 2021
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I once jumped head-first into poison ivy.

It was a rash decision.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 18
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Predestinatural
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 12 2021
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My Dr didn’t immediately treat my poison ivy reaction.

He doesn’t like to make rash decisions.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/cabbithunt
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 21 2021
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Want to start a Hula band that covers music by Poison.

Gonna call it Poi, Son.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jarofcomics77
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 08 2021
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The ancient Romans made a lot of deadly poisons. The fourth one they created, however, just made people itchy.

They called it poison IV

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/this_time_i_mean_it
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 26 2020
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I was going to use this mushroom to poison someone

But it's a morel.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/BaldingMonk
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 28 2020
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What do you say if you find a person trying to poison someone with celiacs disease

I’ve caught you bread handed

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/EmmaOwl
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 10 2020
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Why'd the chef get poison ivy?

He needed an itch to cook from scratch.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/billbixbyakahulk
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 11 2020
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I tried to cheat during my jog by taking a shortcut through some bushes, but I didn’t realize it was poison ivy...

That was a rash decision.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 09 2020
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I think my friend who owns the apiary got into some poison ivy or something during a hike in the woods...

He has hives.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 28 2020
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Why didn’t the man die when he drank poison?

He was in the living room.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/James-Kinley
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 29 2019
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There is a clear difference between a poison dart frog and a bullfrog.

As if it wasn't obvious enough...

They're two toad-ally different things!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ecquid-indignius
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 22 2019
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Poison girls.

Hello Boys and Girls.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/rivennnnnnnn
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 27 2019
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2 puns, 1 post. Resistol (resist all) poison. This type of hat is called a Cattleman, hence the name β€œThe Rattleman”
πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/denzel_washingtowels
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 27 2019
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After having an allergic reaction to poison ivy I decided not to get it treated...

man have I made a rash decision

πŸ‘οΈŽ 22
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jfkas10
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 17 2019
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My wife offered me some benadryl for my poison ivy, but I told her I'd have to think about it.

I don't want to make any rash decisions right away.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pseudoorbit
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 10 2019
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Why was Batman not attracted to Poison Ivy?

Because of her breasts-in-plants

πŸ‘οΈŽ 36
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Charlemagnalpaca
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 06 2018
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Andy's aunt on The Andy Griffith Show got poison ivy on her arm and all she did was complain...

She was Bee-itchy!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 10 2019
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What do you call a room that's littered full of mouse traps and poison cheese?

Mouseschwitz...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/GDRexRacer77
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 05 2019
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Why did the woman who wanted to poison her husband, cross the road?

To get to the other cyanide.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/eltegs
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 20 2018
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Did you guys hear about the new Oxygen-Potassium based poison?

Scientists were really worried about it at first, but then realized it was O K.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/OnyxSwangin
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 20 2017
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My wife asked me to spray ant poison

I didn't do it because I didn't want my uncle to feel bad.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Thekolin99
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 01 2016
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My friend said the poison cover he put on his mattress didn't kill the bugs.

I asked if he tried this.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Novawurmson
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 23 2016
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Dadjoked by my boss after I sprayed ant poison all around the building...

Boss: I'm gonna call this spray 'Pink Panther'.

Me: Why?

Boss: Dead-ant, dead-ant, dead-ant, dead-ant, dead-ant, dead-ant, dead-aaaaaaaaant!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Bobby_Orrs_Knees
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 18 2015
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In Ancient Rome, there were 4 types of poison.

Poisons I, II, and III would all kill you with varying degrees of pain.

However, Poison IV would just make you really itchy.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SnakehoundXE
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 14 2020
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What do you get when you combine a 4 leaf clover, with poison ivy?

A rash of good luck.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/andyb2383
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 17 2021
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy and a four leaf clover?

A rash of good luck! πŸ€

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Rivethart
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 14 2021
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In Ancient Rome, there were four types of poisons. Poisons I, II, and III would kill you instantly.

Poison IV would just make you kinda itchy

πŸ‘οΈŽ 57
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mr_iguano_man
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 07 2021
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In ancient Rome there were four different types of poison...

Poisons I, II, and III were deadly...

Poison IV just made you itchy.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 39
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Hicks4183
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 10 2021
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I took a shortcut through some bushes, but didn’t realize I was walking into poison ivy...

That was a rash decision.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 25 2020
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