One says, “We’re saved! We can ask him for directions!” His friend, however, had a somber expression on his face. “Doesn’t something seem off to you about this man?” he replies, gesturing to the figure lying prostrate on the road before them. “What do you mean?” said the first, confusion splayed across his features. “I mean we can’t trust a thing he says. He’s a pathological lier.”
All I could ever do is wander Y.
.....when asked his name by the cop filling out the report he replied Shut Up. The frustrated cop asked repeatedly for his name and was met each time with an equally frustrated and louder reply of SHUT UP! The cop got angry and then asked....hey man, are you looking for trouble? The reply back was "Yes! That's the reason I came here....I'm looking for Trouble!!!"
He called it the Earnest Lemming-Way.
Wife is 7 weeks pregnant. She turns to me and says the baby would be the size of a bean at this stage. I replied "Wow! Inside you is a human bean!" Silent treatment from the wife ensued, but worth it.
"Well, recently didn't you say you wanted to live a bolder life?" Zing!
"I started as a French major."
"Don't you normally start as a private?"