I used to be a film photographer but learned it was a negative hobby.
One that lens itself to bad puns.
The kind that make you shutter.
I have proof.
Those were some dark days.
Short
I'll never forget it
“Because its tracks are still here!”
He points it out to my gf and asks, “How many people do you think are dead in there?”
“I don’t know, maybe a thousand?” she replies.
“All of them are dead,” he says.
My gf gives me that “you are the same person as your father” eye roll look as I grin and nod my head, knowing I will now use this joke every time I pass a cemetery.
He'll never sell ice cream going that fast
Getting sheet faced, he can't say no to the boos
People are dying to get in there
"That's the last place I want to go."
Us: WHAT?! ...Goddammit.
"I hear people are dying to get into that place."
"People are dying to get in there!"
"Wow! People must be dying to get in there."
Or
DAD: "What did one dead person say to another?"
ME: "What?"
DAD: "....................................."
ME: "Seriously, what did he say?"
DAD: "......................................"
ME: "OHHHHHHHH, I get it."
I replied.... Skin to Skin?
That's how we got into this mess.
Dad: "Wow that graveyard is packed, do you know why it's so crowded?" "I heard people are dying to go there."
"Who's making all that racket?"
"That's the dead centre of [wherever we are], that is!" `
a Yard Sale.
Dad: "Who would sell just the yard, what about the house?"
a Garage Sale.
Dad: "Where are they going to park their cars then?"
"It's that time of the year again!"
Roll on 2060...
After we are done eating and the waiter comes to grab our dishes, my dad will point at his empty plate and say:
"As you can see, I didn't like any of that!". Awkward laughs all around the table...
(Goes past a "Huge Book Sale" sign in a window)
Dad: I don't see any huge books, they must have sold out.
Car speeds past my dad
Dad - That guy must be taking the Browns to the super bowl!
Me - facepalm
...it's a dead business.
I'll see myself out.
It was a tense situation .
Dad: man, people are dying to get in there
...
