My Favorite Punny Pajama Pants
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πŸ‘€︎ u/punny_lil_bunny
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18
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What do you call a zombie in pajamas?

The sleepwalking dead

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πŸ‘€︎ u/UkuSw0w
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02
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(My 8-year old made this one up) What kind of pajamas do they wear on Hoth?

Wampa-jamas

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shakerchef
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2019
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My kid was eating sloppy joe's in his pajamas.

Now he has sloppy jams.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/manlyvpn
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2019
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I shot an elephant in my pajamas

Why he was in my pajamas I will never know

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πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2019
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Boonanas in Pajamas
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Diesel_Measles
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2019
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I suffer from pajama paralysis.

Am I going to change? Probably not.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/howdoyoudivorce
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2019
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What did my pajamas get on his report card?

One C

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PostreDeLaNoche
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2019
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I once shot a bear in my pajamas.

How it ever got into my pajamas I'll never know.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Killzent
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2018
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Last night I shot an elephant in my pajamas

How he got in my pajamas, I’ll never know.

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2018
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So there's this guy in pajamas at Blockbuster...

The clerk asks him "Did you get a copy of all the Disney movies you wanted?"

"Nah, I just got UP."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mxjf
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2017
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What do you call someone who makes pajamas?

A soft wear engineer.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IsItTimeToPanic
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2017
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I got expelled from school on pajama day.

Its not my fault I sleep naked.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/__Odelay__
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2018
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Do you sleep in your pajamas?

No, I sleep in my bed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/paulinkenbrandt
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2018
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Last night, I couldn't find my normal pajamas, so I put on swim trunks.

My wife asked, "why are you wearing swim trunks right now?"

Because, I'm about to dive into bed!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rockbandit
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2017
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In my downtime, I've taken to making sleepwear for my pets.

They are the cat's pajamas.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/adjaru182
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14
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Dad jokes in real life.

Tonight my wife and I were explaining why my son had to wear pajama bottoms after putting anti-itch cream on his legs, because it kept it from rubbing off on the sheets. β€œBut doesn’t it rub off on the pajamas?” asked my daughter. My wife patiently explained that the cream could then rub back onto his legs.

β€œYes,” I said. β€œIt’s a perpetual lotion machine.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jofish22
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2018
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She needed to prepare for trouble, make that double!

Today a student of mine was wearing a Pikachu onesie for pajama day at work (a junior in h.s.).our conversation went like this. If she wasn't in anime club with me I would have left her alone.

Me: did your wear that so guys would want to take a peek-at-chu?

Student : Mrs. Acinomismonica, please stop

Me: why? You scared they won't choose you?

Student : I'm going to stop talking to you now

Me: don't be such an Ash

Student : Mrs. Acinomismonica, you need to stop!

Me: c'mon student, you gotta Ketchum to my jokes

Enter the rest of my class groaning, it was a good day. Good thing I stopped before they threw Brocks at me.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/acinomismonica
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2016
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One of my Dad's more popular jokes.

I shot an elephant in my underwear the other day. I have no idea how it got in them

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CreamyGoodness90
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2014
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Got the girlfriend last week.

After a date night, I walked her to a car. It was late, so she tole me to go upstairs and put on my pajamas.

Her - "well, you don't wear pajamas. I guess your boxers"

Me - "right. I don't sleep in the nude. That'd be a little weird"

Her - "There are weirder things to sleep in"

Me - "Yeah, like a suit of armor"

Her - "That would be weird"

Me - "At least I'd get a good knight's sleep!"

She roller her eyes and told me to go to bed.

Edit - I clearly can't type. I'm leaving the 'roller' mistake though.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/triculous
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2015
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What is Waldo when he goes to bed at night?

The boy in the striped pajamas

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kuczkowski
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2017
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Husband's first dad joke as a new dad.

Context: Our 3 month old son had some cotton/fuzz/lint stuck between his fingers from a newer pair of pajamas. I was trying to keep his hands out of his mouth because I didn't want him eating the cloth particles.

Husband came out with this: Leave him alone LDJD. He has to get his fiber. Get it, fiber?

groans

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ldjd
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2014
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Meet the Jack of all dadjokes!

I was asked to help chauffeur a carload of youth around town for a Christmas caroling activity last night. One of the names on the list was Jack, who lost his wife earlier this year. Jack is in his early 90's, stands about 5'2, and is quite possibly the king of all dad jokes.

So, the group of about 25 kids and 5 adults sneak up to his doorstep and begin singing a few short Christmas carols. Eventually, he opens the door and is thrilled to have visitors.

After we are finished singing and the kids are all running back to the vehicles to get out of the 15 degree weather, jack steps out of his doorway and on to his porch. He is wearing a light t-shirt and pajama pants... he was setting us up, and we took the bait, hook, line, and sinker.

Woman: Are you freezing?

Jack: No, I'm not freezing, I'm Jack (pause for laughter)

Jack: but if you hang on for just a minute, I can get freezing for you.

and then he just stood there smiling at us. It was precious. Come to find out, Jack is entering

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Happyazz84
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2013
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My co-worker got me today

It was spirit week at work (to raise money for American Cancer Society) and today was pajama day. I showed up in my pink owl pajamas and looked real cute. Anyways as we're leaving, he almost slips on the hardwood, forgetting he wasn't wearing shoes.

Me: (laughing) are you okay? Him: yeah, I'm sure that was a real... Hoot. insert groans from other co workers

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KrissKross94
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2015
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Got her...

My gf was obsessing over these batman pajamas when she said...

"OMG I want these so bad, i think i might just have to sell my body for them." (obviously implying prostitution)

"But then what would you put them on?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CrativeDomo
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2013
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Not sure if I dadjoked my wife or myself.

My wife is always cold in bed and uses a heated mattress pad to keep her side so scalding hot you could fry eggs on it. And then she piles on a ton of blankets. And wears flannel pajamas. As she was climbing into bed last night I said:

me - I wish I was a dragon.

her - ::confused look::

me - So I could withstand the insane heat it would take to get you to sleep naked.

She laughed. But didn't get naked. Guess the joke was on me.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thetk42one
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2014
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Answering the whine: "I'm Cold!"

A: (getting out of the tub) "I'm cold!"

I proceed to call him "Cold" as a proper name for the next five minutes while he gets dried off and I clip his fingernails. ("Give me your hand, Cold." "What's so funny, Cold?")

Me: "Okay, Cold, go get on your pajamas."

A: (laughing) "STOP CALLING ME 'COLD.'"

Me: "You know... if you get your pajamas on... and warm up..."

A: "Then I won't be 'Cold' any more."

Me: "Yep."

(Pajamas on)

Me: "A! Where have you been?? I haven't seen you for a while. I thought 'Cold' was going to be here all night!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Redbeard25
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2015
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My dad has is baby granddaughter's best interest at heart, yet he's still logical.

While putting footie pajamas on my baby niece we realized she was too tall for them. My dad says, "Cut off her feet and they'll fit. She's young, she'll adapt."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lrnrae
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2013
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5 year old walks straight into a dad joke

Daughter yells from the bathroom: "I'm going to get in my pajamas now!"

Husband replies without missing a beat: "finish wiping first or they'll be Poojamas."

Me: "that needs to go on r/dadjokes. Either you post it or I will.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SupersonicJungle
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2014
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