I guess it was habit forming
Because the radiation altered his jeans.
Ranch dressing
Lukewarm
A lawsuit.
"Hey! Who we playing tonight?"
Santa: Hoe hoe hoe.
It was quite suitable
I’ve always found them to be very uplifting.
A three peas suit ...
Annoying visitors, low pay... and now I've got a rash from my itchy uniform!
I've had it up to here with this Mickey Mouse outfit!
Says she can’t see me in camouflage.
I said, well, they do have the same genes.
He says its like shooting fish in apparel.
I'm not lion and won't be a cheetah
The singer of "Believe" asked me to give her some.
I told her, "But I don't want to, Cher"
It's called Thai Me Down
She said he was the lone arranger.
Yet none of my coworkers have noticed.
me: hey love is this outfit inn appropriate
girlfriend: no
me: ok I guess I'll go change
She said it’s an old habit
I let the salesman pick my nose.
Because good habits are hard to maintain and bad habits are hard to break.
https://i.redd.it/32qkvjdpobk21.jpg
The ipatch
I told them it came out of the closet this morning
They'll both clean up your meth.
I think he is a little racist
A sweat suit
(My mom told this to me not even 5 minutes ago; I think they're evolving)
What a waist of paper.
For when they get a hole in one!
She got all up in my gill.
It can really tie an outfit together
Hey guys, relatively new dad here. Pretty proud of myself because this came naturally. My 7 mo daughter, wife and I were hiking yesterday. My daughter was strapped to the front of me, and she started to stink. We found a field to lay her on her changing mat and change her diaper. She had a complete explosion so it required an outfit change. I looked up at my wife and said “looks like I’ll be performing a field dressing”. Corny af I know, but it made my wife laugh 😆!
I can't wait to see her going down the stairs!
It was clothes-quarters combat.
They said “ we don’t have any I’m afraid”. I said “don’t be silly, it’s just a costume.”
....are Costumer's Customers....
Surrounded by his son, his twin daughters and a haggard-looking nurse who looked about ready to end it all if only she could find the bloody switch, he was finally breathing his last.
His son, who loved him dearly and wasn't at all sure if he had been cut out of the will or not, burst into tears at the plight of a man who would look more at home in a red woolly outfit than he ever could in drab, white linen.
"I do not wish to die today, Anthony", he intoned fixing his gaze slightly above his son's left shoulder, "there is something you must do to save me."
"Tell me what to do dad, I can't bear to look at you this way", cried Anthony.
"There is a land, not far from here, where no one ever dies. It is not for dying you see. That is where I must go."
"Where is this place father? Tell me, and I shall take you to it."
"Take me there now", he said faintly as if in great pain, "Take me to, The Living Room."
But then I realized that would be a little pre-conceived.
