A relatable inanimate object pun that I drawded.
My friend and I started a business where we weigh tiny objects.
It’s a small scale operation.
What is the object oriented way to get wealthy?
My wife is such a sex object.
Every time I want sex, she objects.
My wife: You need to do more chores around the house.
Me: Can we change the subject?
Her: Ok. More chores around the house need to be done by you.
A report just came out exposing how the government's mishandling of an explosive object could've caused the deaths of hundreds of civilians
My wife got mad at me for have sexual affairs with inanimate objects
I told her it was one night stand...
I have started freezing different objects at -273.15°c and blowing them up. Seeing with items reacted differently.
I call it the 0k boomer experiment.
We preserve objects very well these days.
Soon, artefacts may just become a thing of the past.
Who would run a country where there are only objects used for geometrical drawing?
My wife said I can't treat people like objects.
I'm not so sure I can live with that.
The Muppets teamed up with NASA to name a newly discovered celestial object.
Upon its first sighting, the Jim Henson Company issued a press release, "Comet Defrog here."
Two people are at someone's funeral
The host asks the guest,
"Would you like to say a word?"
The guest than goes up than says,
"Bargain"
The host starts crying and says,
"That means a great deal."
What is the most sexual object in the world?
A door, because it wont stop banging the frame.
This one weird object will literally shock you!
I have no objection to people being spontaneous,
I just think there is a time and a place for it.
A clock is the most likely object to get corona
because it always has its hands on it's face
It’s funny they call them “unidentified flying objects”
I could identify them right away. those are ufos.
If you die from smoking weed does that mean that you were killed by a blunt object?
Gabe had a heavy load this semester
Math, physics, comp sci. The only easy class was "The American Century." Open book midterm and final, so he wasn't going to do any of the reading all semester.
“It’s a huge waste of time, Dad,” he laughed when I objected. “I’m not learning a damn thing in the class.”
“Well, then you’re just going to have to take that class over again,” I snapped at him.
“What are you talking about?” he yelped.
“You know why, Gabe,” I said. “Those who don’t learn from history are condemned to repeat it.”
When people think of calculators they think the buttons are the most important thing
But it's what's inside that counts
How do flat round throwing objects sort their opinional differences?
Frankenstein enters a body building competition and finds he has seriously misunderstood the objective
I think I lost my sense of object permanence
Why are three-dimensional objects so good at cutting down trees?
Them: Don’t treat women like objects
Me: Women women = new Women();
I just found out that a circle is the most pointless object
Which weighs more, a gallon of water or a gallon of butane?
A gallon of water. Butane is lighter fluid.
Did you hear about Hooters’ new contactless delivery service?
For a while it was knockers, but now it’s just honkers
I made an object that simulates how something travels downhill
What fee is connected to every wedding and no-one objects?
Is this safe to eat?
No, the safe stores valuable objects.
My wife was just swapping out objects on the mantle, and my son asked why she was putting bamboo up there.
I told him she was decorating for Halloween, and they both just gave me a flat look. Then with a grin on my face I simply said bamBOO!!
Much to my wife’s dismay my 6 year old has been repeating it for the last 20 minutes.
A 1-D object and a 2-D object walk into a bar
The 1-D object turns to the 2-D object
“Dear Diary, I think I have trouble distinguishing between inanimate objects and human beings.”
My therapist: Yes, I see that. Stop calling me Diary.
At least, he "seas" his objective clearly...
Are there a lot of first-person singular objective pronouns, or is it just me?
My friend and I started a business where we weigh microscopic objects.
It’s a small scale operation.
I just started a business where we specialize in weighing tiny objects.
It’s a small scale operation.
I've just started a business where I weigh tiny objects.
It's a small scale operation
My friend and I just started a business where we weigh tiny objects.
It’s a small scale operation.
I call my wife the sex object.
Anytime i want sex, she objects.
My friends and I started a business where we weigh really tiny objects.
It’s a small scale operation.
I just started my own business where we weigh tiny objects.
It’s a small scale operation.
My friend and I started a business where we weigh tiny objects.
It’s a small scale operation.
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
