Corsican!
It's enormous. It seems likes it's been around forever. It is growing every day. It's something that will be passed onto our children and grandchildren.
Nobody accepts the Spanish ink decision.
As a tribute, Reddit r/Jokes will be quarantined for 24 hours.
Makes no cents.
Amerkin.
He had a deadly right hook.
Vaccination.
Are country music
In other words, it’s between Iraq and a hard place.
Mechs-icans!
(Actually a kid joke from my boy)
For context I work in a prison as a nurse. The other nurses were looking up charges for one of the inmates and hes in for capital murder. One of the nurses asks, "Whats the difference between capital murder and just murder anyway?" to which I was quick to say "usually a bigger M"
I guess Ive been a dad too long now that it comes natural
Witnesses claim they didn't see it coming
53 is a prime number. Then we can truly be one nation, indivisible.
When you’re trying to find the facilities, you’re Russian. Once you get there though, European.
UNEEDCHEF
Fouchy!
All of them
Investigators haven't released the name of the whistle-blower.
Well he was having Nunavut.
Now, I have back issues.
But we celebrate Son day every week!
Gu-whack-a-mole
His actions were highly ill-eagle
Why is today not National ballerina day?
I mean it is 2-2 after all
One day, a blind customer came in with his chihuahua and demanded a return. “What’s wrong with your CNI dog, sir?” Ron asked. He yelled, “This isn’t what I meant!”
I asked someone to explain it to me and they didn’t make cents.
She’s from imagination.
A giant list of puns
What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.
I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.
Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.
Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!
I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.
What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.
How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.
I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.
Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.
I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.
My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.
Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.
How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.
What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.
Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.
There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.
What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.
What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.
Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.
Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.
How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.
The shovel was a ground breaking invention.
A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."
A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."
Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.
What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.
I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.
What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.
I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.
Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.
Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"
Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.
What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.
Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.
What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.
A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.
After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.
I used to be afraid of hu
... keep reading on reddit ➡And he won! I read it in the French press
Be the change that we wanna see.
To be honest, I'm not shedding any tears over it.
Country music
...Country music.
Country music
