Ministop
But the judge tells him...
" I'm sorry Mickey.. But I can't grant you a divorce just because you say your wife is a little weird."
Mickey says..
" I didn't say she was a little weird... I said she was Fucking Goofy !"
No. Because's she's fucking Goofy!
My 2 1/2 year old niece told me that "Mickey hit Minnie." I told her that's called "mousal abuse." She didn't get it.
"She must have a pretty small car."
Because he was told his password had to contain 8 characters and at least one Capital
During a recent password audit by a company, it was found that an employee was using the following password:
"MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofySacremento"
When asked why they had such a long password, the employee rolled their eyes and said "Hello! It has to be at least 8 characters and include at least one capital!"
He's a lot bigger than I thought he'd be
It’s a Minnie marathon.
A Minnie van.
A minnie-van
http://i.imgur.com/bYNBvEK.jpg
Saw this on /r/funny figured you guys might like it
Minnie-Sota
He’d be Minnie Driver’s mini Mini Driver.
A Minnie van
Step Dad- Did you know that is the dead center of New Jersey Me - REALLY!?........oh
The funniest and shortest puns for kids, you always remember while teaching children puns, try to choose the short ones because they are easy for them to remember and register.
Puns for Kids
Why are teddy bears never hungry? They are always stuffed!
What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie? A pie-thon!
Where do polar bears vote? The North Poll.
What did the judge say when the skunk walked into the court room? Odor in the court!
Two silkworms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools.
The streets in the capital of Afghanistan are paved with Kabulstones.
How does a lion greet the other animals in the field? Pleased to eat you.
What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn? An egg roll!
No matter how much you push the envelope, it will still be stationery.
Why did the turkey cross the road? To prove he wasn’t chicken!
What musical is about a train conductor? “My Fare, Lady”.
A man drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in.
What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.
What animals are on legal documents? Seals!
Why did the lion spit out the clown? Because he tasted funny!
Why did the bumble bee leave the house? It heard the school was having a spelling bee.
Being struck by lightning is really a shocking experience!
How do celebrities stay cool? They have many fans!
Why do fish live in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze!
Dockyard: A physician’s garden.
What did the angry mother say to the boiling pot of spaghetti? Simmer down!
The lights were too bright at the Chinese restaurant so the manager decided to dim sum.
“What’s purple and 5000 miles long?” “Ooh! I know! The Grape Wall of China!”
Every calendar’s days are numbered.
This duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. “Four bucks,” says the bartender. “Put it on my bill.”
I used to be twins. My mother has a picture of me when I was two.
What sound do porcupines make when they kiss? Ouch!
When does a well-dressed lion look like a weed? When he’s a dandelion (dandy lion).
Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a-salted.
A bicycle can’t stand on its own because it is
... keep reading on reddit ➡GF: "Minnie's buried there."
me: "Minnie who?"
GF: "Minnie people."
I was reading my 3 year old a book before bed and one page read, "Minnie likes to cook" and showed Minnie putting cookies in the oven. My wife commented that you BAKE cookies, not COOK them. I replied with, "Oh yeah? Why aren't they called BAKEIES then? "
This afternoon my wife was sewing Halloween costumes for the kids. My daughter is going to be her favorite Disney character, and my wife asks me how long I think the skirt should be.
Me: "Well, you are making a Minnie skirt!"
“I didn’t say she was stupid, I said she was fucking Goofy”
Because she was fucking goofy.
He found out she was fucking Goofy.
The judge said, "I can't approve the divorce just because you think your wife is crazy."
Mickey says, "I didn't say she was crazy, I said she was fucking goofy."
Edit: autocowrecks
Because she was fucking Goofy.
Mickey said "I didn't say she was silly. I said she was fucking Goofy!"
A Minnie Van
A Minnie van!
