In Sweden the CEO of IKEA was just elected president.
He should have his cabinet together by the end of the week.
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︎ Dec 16 2020
I know a good joke about Ikea furniture
But I'm still putting it together
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︎ Dec 23 2020
An IKEA-delivery guy walks into a restaurant.
The waiter goes: That's not my table.
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︎ Jan 14 2021
A man walks into Ikea
And he goes up to the most beautiful worker and says "hi, I'm looking for uh, one night stand"
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︎ Dec 20 2020
I found a good IKEA joke the other day.
But it needs a bit of a set up.
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︎ Aug 15 2020
I heard you can get lawyers at Ikea now.
They're very affordable, but you have to build your own case.
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︎ Oct 25 2020
I don't know why the beautiful attendant at Ikea reported me to the police.
All I asked was "How much for one night stand ?"
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︎ Sep 07 2020
My School was sponsored by Ikea.
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︎ Sep 02 2020
I tried to order a table from IKEA, but I misplaced an umlaut in my search text. I got a couch instead.
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︎ Sep 18 2020
Why is IKEA the cheapest place to get furniture?
Because they have some Swede deals!
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︎ Sep 02 2020
I lost my kid in the kitchenware section of Ikea today.
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︎ Aug 02 2020
I got a rubbish bin from Ikea...
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︎ Aug 11 2020
I saw a sign outside IKEA
It said, "HUGE FURNITURE SALE!"
What if I don't want huge furniture?
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︎ Jun 26 2020
Donβt try to tell jokes about IKEA
Theyβre impossible to put together if you donβt have the instructions.
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︎ Jun 19 2020
There is a mysterious crime spree going on at our local IKEA.
The cops are having a hard time putting the pieces together.
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︎ Jul 03 2018
IKEA furniture
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︎ Aug 13 2019
Do you guys think this ikea pillowcase is a bit Gurli?
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︎ Jul 06 2019
I didnβt go to Ikea today.
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︎ Jun 06 2019
The only thing that doesn't suck at IKEA
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︎ Oct 15 2019
Why did Boris Johnson go to IKEA?
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︎ Sep 13 2019
Guy annoys girlfriend with puns at Ikea
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︎ Aug 24 2015
Ikea's parody video games wordplay
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︎ Apr 30 2018
Where does IKEA keep all of its inventory?
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︎ Feb 20 2019
TIL: All IKEA employees must attend a mandatory meeting every morning before they start their shift.
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︎ Nov 26 2018
I was at IKEA with my friend the other day, and I saw a coffee table called βBiasβ
I said βWell, we canβt get this one!β
βWhy not?β He asked.
βLook at itβ I replied. βItβs leaning to one side.β
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︎ Nov 18 2018
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︎ Aug 24 2015
I bought a cabinet from Ikea
In the instructions it told me to nail it to the wall. After it fell once, I tried again, but it kept falling.
Safe to say, that cabinet is screwed
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︎ Jul 19 2019
IKEA has been taken to court over faulty luggage
The prosecutors are having trouble putting a case together
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︎ Feb 25 2019
My wife told my four year old daughter that she couldnβt use her plastic IKEA knife to slice mangos.
I said βYeah kid, thatβs just not going to cut it.β
My wife looked at me and said βYou think youβre pretty sharp, donβt you?β
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︎ Feb 03 2018
Walking through IKEA's lighting department...
My Stepdaughter says: "This place is lit!"
So proud.
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︎ Apr 03 2019
I like IKEA furniture.
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︎ Jan 04 2019
Did you hear about the IKEA support group?
They help you pick up the pieces, but you have to put yourself together again at home.
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︎ Mar 20 2019
What should you do if your wife doesnt believe you about the deals at Ikea?
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︎ Mar 02 2019
I was trying to assemble ikea furniture..
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︎ Sep 02 2018
My friend keeps breaking into ikea and damaging their furniture. I think he may be suicidal
He's been really into shelf-harming
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︎ Jun 02 2017
IKEA has been accused of evading over $500 million in taxes. Apparently, prosecutors have been after them for years...
reddit.com/r/Jokes/commenβ¦
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︎ Dec 03 2018
If someone who worked at ikea boasted about there book holders you could call it...
shameless shelf promotion
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︎ Feb 16 2018
Me: (trying to fix my wife's IKEA bookshelf)
Wife: "guess it's just past it's Shelf Life"
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︎ Mar 28 2018
IKEA should call their check-out area...
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︎ Jan 05 2015
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︎ Apr 20 2017
Why does Darth Vader hate IKEA?
He finds their faith of Lack disturbing.
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︎ Feb 25 2018
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︎ Aug 24 2017
Ikea
But she kea better.
https://imgur.com/a/Wp5RC
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︎ Sep 10 2017
Wife got me at Ikea
We were passing by a stuffed horse, and I said "hey, want to buy a horse?" to which she replied "neigh"
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︎ Feb 08 2016
whenever you have a problem with ikea then theres only one real solution
killyourshelf
credit:https://youtu.be/j2JVYTtWzVU
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︎ Dec 11 2016
Why did Sean Connery take his iPhone to IKEA?
He wanted to take a shelfie...
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︎ Feb 09 2016
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︎ Sep 10 2015
There is a mysterious crime spree going on at our local IKEA.
The cops are having a hard time putting the pieces together.
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︎ Jun 10 2019
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