What do you call a retired miner?

Doug.

πŸ‘︎ 990
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CasualAustralian
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2021
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What's a miners favorite cookie?

An ore-o!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/majestic_walrus1
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2021
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I just joined an online site for gold miner dating.

My first search for a mate brought no matches, but did give me plenty of prospects.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2021
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What’s the explosive a miner uses?

The bomb-diggity

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ft_a_ladder
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2021
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Why did the coal miner eat his lantern?

He wanted a light snack.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheRockingDead
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2020
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A Police Officer pulls over a Miner at a Traffic Stop

Officer: "Whose car is this? Where are you headed? What do you do?

Miner: "Mine."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IS3OO
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2020
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An underage gold digger is a miner
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πŸ‘€︎ u/afieif
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
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What do miners play on their coffee break?

mine carafe

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2020
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Miner League Prospect.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jwinsome
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2020
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Where are all the stone miners?

In quarry-ntine

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2020
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I hate trying to please miners.

They're so picky!

πŸ‘︎ 55
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πŸ‘€︎ u/desireewhitehall
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2019
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What does the announcer for the Miners Soccer League say when someone scores?

COOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAL

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HVDREW
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2020
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I rang a miner but he was busy...

He said: can I coal you back?

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2020
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Why was the miner so determined to complete digging on a second plot of land?

Because he had one tract mined.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EurassesDragon
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2020
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What was the coal-miner’s excuse to his boss?

β€œI didn’t have time to do my laundry last night, so my soot is dirty!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mirrortoremind
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2020
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A miner was on their way to work in their new car, when a police officer stops them and asks: "where are you going, where do you work, and who's car is this?"

Miner: "mine"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/weetabix_gryphon
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2019
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What was the quiet rich-driven miner up to?

He was mining his own business.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrHollowed
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2020
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I had sex with a miner.

She was a gold digger.

She was super into metal.

We got stoned together.

I'm thinking about coaling her, but you're supposed to wait 3 days.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Death_By_Pun
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2019
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I went out with a coal miner's daughter. I guess you could say I was carbon dated.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NewGamerOK
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2018
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I tried to open a bar inside a cave but the police stopped me. They said it was illegal to sell alcohol to miners..
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CHEEZY_21
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2019
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My best friend is a miner

He's the most down-to-earth guy I know.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NontrivialAnswers
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2019
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What did the miner say when he put on his headlamp?

"I feel light headed".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/etherreal
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2019
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I used to sell drugs to miners...

it was a real underground operation.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Foreverxtrue24
πŸ“…︎ May 30 2019
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A miner jumped into the largest drilling hole in Siberia.

He seemed like a pretty down to earth guy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sodomicity
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2019
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There were a couple of miners make their way to SF. They set up camp for the night underneath a giant half dome. One of the miners was going to make coffee. He ask if anyone else wanted something to drink

Someone yelled back from the other side of camp. β€œYO SEND ME TEA.!”

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SandyHoey
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2019
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Several miners got trapped but the mining company refused to help them.

One could say the miners got shafted.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pun-isher42
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2019
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What do you call a coel miner.

A miner spelling mistake.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TruufadeR
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2018
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What craft does a coal miner take?

Minecraft

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ash_Holes
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2019
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My dad dropped this ones back in 2010 after those Chilean miners were rescued.

Us watching the news cast telling us they were rescued.

Dad: β€œWow that’s crazy. And even after that long ordeal they still can’t have any alcohol to celebrate.”

Me: (Wondering if it had to do medically with the length of time they were underground or the extreme depth.) β€œReally? Why?”

Dad: β€œBecause they are still miners”

πŸ‘︎ 66
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dontbthatguy
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2018
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Being a miner sounds like a boring job.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/emile1138
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2018
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A piano fell on a coal miner

Now you have A Flat Minor.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IndiaVenom
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2018
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Why didn’t the miner come to work today?

Because it was too coal-d outside.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pdonkey
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2019
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So, a miner and a chemist walk into a geology convention.

They approach a table displaying a wide assortment of rocks. The chemist points in the booth's direction and asks the miner, "Which is your favorite; cinnabar or cassiterite?" The miner thought for a moment and replied, "Either ore."

I'll see myself out.

πŸ‘︎ 46
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2017
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Miner's pickaxe.

Every morning an old miner went to work, picked up his pickaxe and didn't think much about it. Years pass, and he just goes to work, takes his pickaxe and never thinks much about it. One morning he goes to work, but his pickaxe isn't there, it's gone. He sighes, and thinks to himself:

"All these years, I took this pickaxe for granite."


came up with this yesterday, if you've heard the same pun let me know the context :)

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mmaramara
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2017
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What rapper does every miner thoroughly enjoy?

J Cole

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Unclegreene
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2018
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My last name is Miner...

Every time I'm out to eat with my dad and ask for a beer, my dad says: "He's still a Miner!" Ugh.

πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pholagoo
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2015
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Miners

Snow white is rummaging through things in the house when the seven dwarves urge her to stay out of a certain chest. She opens it to find it filled with booze, to which she says,

"You dwarves shouldn't be drinking! You're miners!"

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NitroNihon
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2014
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I feel bad for the failed miner...

All his efforts were in vein...

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SalvadorSmall
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2016
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What was the secret to the miner's success?

His use of ground breaking technology

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2015
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Why didn't the miner like his job?

He found it bOREing

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/offlebagg1ns
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2014
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What do you call a retired miner?

Doug!

πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Texgymratdad
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a retired miner?

Doug

πŸ‘︎ 57
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Radish00
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a retired miner?

Doug.

πŸ‘︎ 91
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheWhiskaz
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the miner quit his job?

Because it was boring.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ATAGChozo
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2018
🚨︎ report
A copy asks a miner: whose car is this? Where are you headed? What do you do?

the miner responds "mine."

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jaybutts
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2017
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