Must be in continent.
He'd likely be living in Missouri.
Agriculture.
Nevermind, it's too corny.
I was in mini soda.
Us: WHAT?! ...Goddammit.
I know, it's pretty corny.
Me: Oh look it snowed. Kids! Call the police!!
Kids: WHY?!?!?!
Me: The street is being assaulted!
They're terms of endeerment.
It was Soda grading.
Me-Narrrds
Talking to a coworker from Minnesota, while we currently live on the east coast:
"So how was your easter? Or do you guys celebrate midwester out there?"
No laughs, just silence. I think I did well.
So at my school, we had a pipe burst.
Joke at the end of you want to skip
Now it's pretty normal in the midwest, where I live, to have this thing. It started with the fire alarm going off, because of the pressure decrease, and the school was evacuated. We were all eventually brought back, for it was cold. We sat in our gym for AN HOUR before being dismissed back to our classes.
So it's near the end of the day and I have gym class. And I'm having your normal conversation with a friend about the school's financial problems. And we were just talking about how the school is going to have to pay so much money for the new pipe and the ceiling tiles and the cleaning etc.
And then it was my moment to shine.
So the conversation is almost over and the friend says,
"It'll be a while before normal funds go back".
And I just say this:
"Yeah man, the school's money is going down the drain".
Son: Hey dad, we had a pop quiz today. Me: You had a quiz to see if you know the difference from Dr Pepper and Pepsi?
(If you're not from the Midwest you might not get it)
http://i.imgur.com/p6dZPCB.jpg
We work for an aerial photography company out of a private airport and recently our old windsock needed replaced.
The new text on it reads, "Midwest Aerial Photo - Blow Me" The guy who ordered it kept grinning and we keep groaning.
We drove to Florida from the midwest for vacation last week. After fun in the sun all week, it was time to go home on Saturday. We had lots of movies for our 3 kids to watch including Hugo, which they had never seen.
My 3 year old doesn't like movies that aren't animated so as soon as she saw I was getting Hugo she starts up the whining: "I don't want to watch that, waa aah" and so on. So I turn around in my seat (the wife was driving) and say "We'll then, why don't Hugo to sleep."
I was talking to some friends about the snow yesterday here in the Midwest. I said "it was snowing so hard you can't see 20 feet in front of you!"
My friend Jon responded: "I don't know why you'd want to look at twenty feet, anyways."
