I arrived early to the restaurant. The manager said do you mind waiting a bit? I said no.

Good, he said. Take these drinks to table nine.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 11
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/BillyBob_TX
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 08
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My manager gave me a disappointed look when he saw my doodle.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 23 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do you call a ghost asking for the manager?

I donโ€™t know what to call it!!!! It keeps s-Karen me!!!!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/RSGaming0416
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I was working behind the bar today when two guys came in and tried to pay with a couple of counterfeit ยฃ10 notes. When I told the manager, he asked what they looked like..

โ€œLike ยฃ10 notesโ€ I told him

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/cotswoldboy
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Count Dracula is a terrible project manager...

... He always avoid the stakeholders.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/trickertreater
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do you call a car that wants to speak to the manager

A McKaren

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/KetchupTheTomato
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
How does a senior manager from Texas greet his superior? /r/Big4/comments/jroq6k/hโ€ฆ
๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/windsor_ty
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What did the produce manager tells his daughter who wanted to run away with her boyfriend?

You cantaloupe!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TempleOfBone
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 28 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Cowboy goes in to a hotel and says a single room and a wardrobe for my horse. Your horse sir the manager replied!

Yes my horse is a Mustang and it mustang somewhere!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/tiger7971
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 29 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Two branch managers
๐Ÿ‘︎ 91
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/dat_1dude
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 31 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I got pizza for everyone the day I started my new job as manager...

It was my first order of business

๐Ÿ‘︎ 124
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/dubaidadjokes
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 28 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A good project manager makes updates.

A bad project manager makes up dates.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/JoeFas
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Just heard a grocery store manager telling off a young guy on the checkout. โ€œWhyโ€™d you ask that woman with kids for ID? What was she buying?โ€

โ€œCardamomโ€

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Aphex-Puddle
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 19 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My daughter and I went to the grocery store yesterday, and we were amazed by the quality of the produce. We spoke with the Department Manager and offered to buy all of their Romaine

if he'd lettuce

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Derpalupagus
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What did the ninja delivery boy say to the office manager when he was delivering an unexpected order of pens, pencils, and paper goods?

Supplies!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/kingrangerprops
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 19 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Did you hear a CVS manager had to pee in the forest?

He used the toilet-trees.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/suamigojose
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 10 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What does a manager in New England and a fish have in common?

Theyโ€™re both basses.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/neobloodsin
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 12 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I just got promoted to general manager at the aquarium!

I'm going to have a corner offish and everything!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 10
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/CallingYouForMoney
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 27 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What happened to the bank manager who was all by himself?

He found himself a loan.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/RayInRed
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 18 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why did the safety manager insist that a big pile of LSD be removed immediately from the factory floor?

He felt it was a real tripping hazard.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 11
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/winkelschleifer
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 20 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
โ€œNo smoking allowed!โ€ My manager told me

Sorry Iโ€™ll be quieter next time

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/raumerino
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 08 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Bakery Manager: So why do you want a job here and what qualifications do you have

Me: well, I knead dough

๐Ÿ‘︎ 10
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TrotskiKazotski
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 14 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Manager: "Why would you make a good waiter at my restaurant?"

Me: "I bring a lot to the table."

๐Ÿ‘︎ 21
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/JoeFas
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 27 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Vampires make great project managers

They always try to keep stake holders happy

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/garboooge
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 13 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What did the manager at the animation studio say when they completed a movie?

Teamwork makes the Dreamworks

๐Ÿ‘︎ 13
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/CookieMess110717
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 24 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why did the bank manager leave his wife?

He lost interest in her

๐Ÿ‘︎ 30
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/hutimuti
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 30 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
[OC] Why is Sharon demanding to speak to your manager?

Because Sharon is Karen! (โ˜ž๏พŸใƒฎ๏พŸ)โ˜ž

๐Ÿ‘︎ 10
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TimmyTesticles
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 24 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I just hired Squirtle as our new Human Resources manager

It used to be Charmander but things tended to get heated. This new guy seems to have cooled things off

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TeKilleNit
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 31 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Since I became manager of a helium factory, my employee speak very highly of me.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 17
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/cotswoldboy
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 08 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why didn't the pro shop manager require another golfer to the trio looking for a tee time?

He didn't want to foursome.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 11
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/nutbagger18
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 19 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My dad and I were out for steak last night when the manager came around and asked "How did you find your steak?"

Dad goes, "I just moved the potato and there it was!"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/blueholeload
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 25 2017
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Sign at a convenience store:Our credit manager is Helen Waite...

If you want credit go to Helen Waite

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/shdchko
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 28 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
The manager of a home goods store stops by the lingerie shop to ask about their prices.

The saleswoman says, "For you? A candelabra."

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/razorbladeapplepie
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 09 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Fooled by her manager, she was.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 112
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/lansaman
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 04 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I was buying my groceries in Prague when the manager approached me asking for my proof of citizenship

Being a US national, I wasnโ€™t allowed to use the self Czech out.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TrentonTallywacker
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 30 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Whatโ€™d the manager say when a waiter dropped three plates in one night?

This is really getting out of hand

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Texas_OT
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 28 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Manager. Task manager.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 19
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ndvarn
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 26 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I hear that the Arctic Monkeys recently sold a Carpet to the current Real Madrid manager.

I bet that it looks good on Zidane's floor.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Stoatwobbler
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 11 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I told the "apparent" joke on the front page to my manager

He asked if I had a book of dumbass jokes.

"No, just Reddit."

"Yeah, out of a book?"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 355
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/j0rdanthi
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 08 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
An author was mad at the store manager because not a single copy of his autobiography was making it past the cash register

I guess his story didn't check out

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/immasebe
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 12 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
The store manager asked me if I could move the Kia that was blocking the exit.

I said that I could, but thatโ€™s not my Forte.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 35
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 21 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
At work at PetSmart, little boy yells "guess what?! I have 3 knees!!" My manager takes the bait, says "oh yeah?"

He yells "yeah my left one, my right one, and a weeKNEE!" Child giggles ensue. Instilling dad jokes at a young age. Dadding done right. (:

๐Ÿ‘︎ 45
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/redstert
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 27 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I arrived early at the restaurant last night. โ€œDo you mind waiting for a bit?โ€ The manager asked. โ€œNot at allโ€ I replied.

โ€œGood, take these lasagnas to table 6โ€ he said.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 69
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/cotswoldboy
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 21 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report

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