Madonna has confessed her love for Indian snacks in a song

Poppadom Preach

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GaryTheKnight
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2019
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Did you know?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/someauthor
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2019
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Dad's been busy


After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to WalMart. Unfortunately, like most men; I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter, from the local WalMart:

Dear Mrs. Harris:

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion, in our store.

We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to, ban both of you from the store.

Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras:

  1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.

  2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

  3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

  4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money. We don't have a Code 3.

  5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.

  6. August 14: Moved a, 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

  7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.

  8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.

  9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

  10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

  11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while, loudly humming the, 'Mission Impossible' theme.

  12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his, 'Madonna Look' using different sizes of funnels.

  13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

  14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed;


  1. Took a bo
... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/specklesinc
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2019
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All the 70s solo female artists seem extremely vain to me.

They are a bunch of pre Madonnas.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
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Studying Spanish and these are the puns I've come up with so far.

English and Spanish.

The Trump administration is making a game out of getting Latinos out of the country, they call it deporte.

Spanish heathens have to pay extra to preforn their ceremonies. Pagan rituals

What sci-fi weapon does the King of Spain prefer? A rey-gun!

Do you know how many times anyone had to tell me how to say 'eleven' in Spanish? Once.

Exclusivamente en espaΓ±ol (PerdΓ³n por errores gramaticales)

QuΓ© comida es el mas mojado? El agua-cate

Cual comida no puede decir una mentira? La verdadura

Como se llama un libro sobra la revoluciΓ³n? Libre!

QuΓ© es exactamente una mejor que Beyonce? Beydoce

Cual animal siempre tiene un novio o novia? El Parejaro.

Cual comida es el menos diverido? Aburrito.

Sobre que papel de pelicula de Madonna no le quiere hablar? Evita!

Quiero que me digΓ‘is mas. Nunca tengo suficiente bromas!

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ‘€︎ u/DankOfTheEndless
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2017
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I hate all 1970s female solo singers because of how vain they are.

They are a bunch of pre-Madonnas

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2018
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What's the best set time for a band at Coachella?

Pre-Madonna and Post Malone

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Aural_B
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2019
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Daughter: Hey dad... What do they mean by primadonna?

Dad: ohhh honey... Thats Madonna before she was madonna.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ‘€︎ u/Baldomccoy
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2018
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In the car with my girlfriend...

So my girlfriend and I are driving in the car and she's talking about her roommates

GF: "And she can be a real prima donna"

Me: "At least she's not a post-madonna!"

Cue groans :)

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ‘€︎ u/kobear403
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2014
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I find most 70s solo female artists extremely vain.

They are a bunch of pre madonnas.

πŸ‘︎ 53
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2018
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I dislike most 70’s female solo artists because they appear vain.

They are a bunch of pre Madonnas.

πŸ‘︎ 53
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2018
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