πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheWhaleMan
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2013
🚨︎ report
There's a rather unknown Greek myth that involved Zeus farting so loudly that it caused powerful lightning storms all over Greece. Panic and chaos ensued, and there was widespread looting as fires raged out on control.

Thus began the Zeus Toot Riots.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hollowbody57
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07
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When the AC circuits in your home are hit by a DC lightning bolt..

It's a current affair.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/reachingnexus
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09
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Got struck by lightning today

It was shocking

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/karma-enigma
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25
🚨︎ report
What do you call a Hindu God taking birth as lightning McQueen

Incarnation.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/within_kamath23
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17
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If lightning struck the engine of a train pulling 50 cars, would someone riding the caboose get shocked?

Only if he’s a good conductor.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BargleFlargen
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18
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What happens if you were attacked by Pikachu's lightning?

You'd turn into Ash .

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Emir_t_b
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12
🚨︎ report
Why did the man driving the train get stuck by lightning?

He was a good conductor.

πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wolfy621
πŸ“…︎ May 07
🚨︎ report
What do you call a Mongolian leader who got struck by lightning

Shocka Khan

πŸ‘︎ 92
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tjeters
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07
🚨︎ report
What's Lightning McQueen's secret chili ingredient?

Carbonzo beans!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DM_to_the_stars
πŸ“…︎ May 18
🚨︎ report
How was the misbehaving lightning bolt punished?

He was grounded

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cjfullinfaw07
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08
🚨︎ report
What does Lightning McQueen feed his cat?

Cat-chow!!

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/casybaseball
πŸ“…︎ May 02
🚨︎ report
There is a higher chance of being struck by lightning than to be killed in a shark attack.

Shocking isn't it.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/crackshot666
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10
🚨︎ report
What do you call it when lightning McQueen eats a car?

Auto-cannibalism

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DillSoupYT
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28
🚨︎ report
What did the optometrist say when the Russian aircraft flew past at lightning speed?

He felt it might have been an optical Illyushin

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/winkelschleifer
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28
🚨︎ report
How do meteorologist track lightning strikes?

They use a Thor-mometer!

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Icebolt08
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04
🚨︎ report
πŸ”₯ A look inside a tree that has been struck by lightning. v.redd.it/rza32k4frqt31
πŸ‘︎ 41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/neur0nic
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2019
🚨︎ report
What religion is Lightning McQueen?

raceism

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Macknificent101
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15
🚨︎ report
How come a man driving a train got struck by lightning?

He was a good conductor.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Do you want to hear a joke about a bolt of lightning?

Actually, maybe not. The end is rather shocking.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BanoffeeBoi35
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2019
🚨︎ report
An underperforming orchestra was playing in an open field when lightning struck its musical director. Luckily, he survived.

He was quite a bad conductor

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gssn-nospace
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
🚨︎ report
I was surprised when i saw a man get struck by lightning

The man was shocked as well

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SlickKennyy
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Dad: Be careful standing near those trees. Me: Why? The sky is clear, there's no chance of lightning.

Dad: I don't know really, they just look kind of shady to me.

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kpontop9
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2019
🚨︎ report
I saw a guy in a tux standing in the middle of a field during a lightning storm.

Turns out he was a conductor.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rurgtide
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2019
🚨︎ report
What did Lightning McQueen say when he ate a nut?

Cashew

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LeeviTheGuru
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Lightning McQueen's been naughty
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HollowOrnstein
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2019
🚨︎ report
This one comes from my 6 year old but I thought it belonged here. β€œWhat did the lightning say after it told a good joke?”

BOOM! (followed by exploding rock hand gesture)

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/emrhiannon
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Why was there lightning and thunder in the lab?

The scientists were brainstorming.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HalalPork97
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2019
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How do you stop a Dad whose as fast as lightning?

With a rubber

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2019
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I never knew how lightning worked

Thats until it finally struck me

πŸ‘︎ 87
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Saladbbar
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2018
🚨︎ report
Risky Dad Joke: My wife said the stretch marks on her legs looked like lightning bolts...

So I said, that's because you have thunder thighs.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EricTheReddit
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2014
🚨︎ report
If a train gets struck by lightning

Does that mean the conductor is good at their job?

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/t_wicca
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Lightning never strikes coffee in its bean form.

Only when it's ground.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MelkorHimself
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2018
🚨︎ report
My Dad says I hammer like lightning!

I never strike in the same place twice.

πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dimick1
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2018
🚨︎ report
Lightning

I was thinking about lightning then all of a sudden it struck me!

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RainwatchGaming
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2018
🚨︎ report
What is the first sense that you lose when you are struck by lightning?

your sense of humor.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/YucksterFukster
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2018
🚨︎ report
I used to wonder how lightning worked.

Then it struck me.

πŸ‘︎ 255
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ScottyUrb
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2017
🚨︎ report
Why does lightning strike a tree before a person?

Because it takes the path of leaf resistance

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AsSheenOnTV
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did Thor lose his lightning powers? reddit.com/r/Jokes/commen…
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bollykeys
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2018
🚨︎ report
I was in my backyard in the hot tub last night enjoying the views of the incoming lightning storm not thinking of the danger.

And then it struck me....

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/buckeyespud
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the man driving a train get struck by lightning?

He was a good conductor.

πŸ‘︎ 62
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PDXCharmander
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2017
🚨︎ report
A lightning bug hit out windshield and left a glowing smear.

I said 'He won't have the guts to to that again'

πŸ‘︎ 87
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gets_the_dad_joke
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2017
🚨︎ report
I read a bunch of news articles dealing with lightning strikes recently.

I am trying to keep myself knowlegeable in current events.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Calthropstu
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2017
🚨︎ report
I heard there's been a slew of lightning strikes recently.

Something about wanting benefits. You can learn more in current events.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Calthropstu
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2018
🚨︎ report
What did the cow that was struck by lightning say?

I'm udderly shocked.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/douchiemane
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2017
🚨︎ report
I was struck by lightning on my way home and suddenly realized the meaning of life.

It was an enLIGHTNING experience

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GigglestickII
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2017
🚨︎ report
I was in class and another student told our teacher about how a lightning strike killed over a dozen cows grouped together during a thunderstorm.

My response "I bet his calves were sore after that one"

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kvekva
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2017
🚨︎ report
What did the lightning rod say to the other?

"I'm always struck in the head."

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mcklauster
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2017
🚨︎ report
The true cost of dadjokes: man struck by lightning, daughter assumes he's kidding

http://www.thedenverchannel.com/news/front-range/arvada/arvada-man-knocked-out-by-lightning-while-videotaping-monday-nights-storm-from-inside-his-garage (video autoplays)

>His daughter Ileah heard the crash, ran over, and found her dad convulsing on the floor.

>"At first I thought he was joking, because that's the kind of person my dad is..."

Doctor Grant would have been proud. https://gs1.wac.edgecastcdn.net/8019B6/data.tumblr.com/a6a9170d54b98df4d8ef9f4f9c39b2ae/tumblr_inline_mlme68KRS11qz4rgp.gif

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/rocketwikkit
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2014
🚨︎ report
How come a man driving a train got struck by lightning?

He was a good conductor.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2019
🚨︎ report
How come a man driving a train got struck by lightning?

He was a good conductor.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Quint_Cordewener
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2019
🚨︎ report

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