Next time I'm on a roller coaster, I'm bringing some nuts and bolts with me.

When nearly on the top, scream with a panic voice at the guy infront, "LOOK BRO, THESE FELL OUT OF YOUR SEAT."

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18
🚨︎ report
I'm a big hit every year at Christmas when I tell the Usain Bolt joke.

This is a running joke.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WantedDadorAlive
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28
🚨︎ report
I joined to pieces of metal today without nuts and bolts or welding

The whole process was riveting

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mitalily
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06
🚨︎ report
Which country did Usain Bolt move to after his retirement?

Iran.

πŸ‘︎ 48
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2020
🚨︎ report
All day I drill holes in metal and bolt them together

At first it’s boring and then it’s Riveting!

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAvacadoBandit
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2020
🚨︎ report
The local Blacksmith got a new dog. When he got him home he made a bolt for the door.

His other dog sat in the corner. It's a boxer.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DarthVarn
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
🚨︎ report
All day I drill holes in metal and bolt them together. /r/Jokes/comments/j6b0uc/…
πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/alasimhere
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear the news Usain Bolt has COVID19?

Its spreading fast!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brokenbyher2019
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
🚨︎ report
How do lighting bolts laugh?

They crack up

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/xx420mcyoloswag
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2020
🚨︎ report
How was the misbehaving lightning bolt punished?

He was grounded

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cjfullinfaw07
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Usain Bolt has Corona virus

I guess there is something that can catch up to him.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gfy4dsny
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I was telling jokes about nuts and bolts

But then I screwed up.

πŸ‘︎ 52
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hensfan85
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2020
🚨︎ report
When the AC circuits in your home are hit by a DC lightning bolt..

It's a current affair.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/reachingnexus
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you use to put a bolt in someones back?

A double crossbow.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ“…︎ May 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Do you want to hear a joke about a bolt of lightning?

Actually, maybe not. The end is rather shocking.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BanoffeeBoi35
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Bought a dog from a blacksmith yesterday, got him home and the first thing he did was make a bolt for the door
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dmed24
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2019
🚨︎ report
Dead bolt
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CP-23
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2019
🚨︎ report
Usain bolt must be a fruit

Have you seen that mango?

πŸ‘︎ 336
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AssasinButt
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2018
🚨︎ report
Someone once told me a story about screws, nuts and bolts.

It was Riveting.

πŸ‘︎ 53
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SuperSquirrel73
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2019
🚨︎ report
What is it when a cannibal sees Usain Bolt?

Fast food.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/koreangamerguy
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2019
🚨︎ report
Risky Dad Joke: My wife said the stretch marks on her legs looked like lightning bolts...

So I said, that's because you have thunder thighs.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EricTheReddit
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2014
🚨︎ report
I saw this woman flirting with Usain Bolt down the pub earlier.

β€œHmmm! She’s trying to pull a fast one” I thought

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cotswoldboy
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Bolt crosses the Finish line to win another gold medal [2016]
πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_wastl
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2019
🚨︎ report
I just finished a great documentary about the process by which metal sheets are fastened together with steel bolts.

It was riveting.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_iraq_such_as
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the Boston Dynamics home-protection robot that failed to stop intruders due to faulty shoulder bolts?

It was easily disarmed.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cyphr0st
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend told me he could tighten bolts with his butt

Personally, I think he torques out of his ass

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Clbull
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2019
🚨︎ report
I read a book titled The Nuts & Bolts of Nuts & Bolts.

It was fasten-ating.

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/garbagearmy
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2017
🚨︎ report
I've been told a fat guy outran Bolt

He must be faster than light

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jacksonrr3
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2018
🚨︎ report
What's the opposite of Usain Bolt?

Me crazy nut.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ryanooooo
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2018
🚨︎ report
Usain Bolt sucks at playing hide and seek.

He can run but he can't hide.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sodomicity
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2019
🚨︎ report
How did the crazy bolt explain the difference between himself and his brother to his brother?

"You sane bolt."

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2018
🚨︎ report
What's Usain Bolt's favourite subject?

Jography

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/joeChump
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2018
🚨︎ report
A lot of people are talking about Usain Bolt.

I guess it's a running joke.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fatandsalt
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the rusty bolt go to the bar?

To loosen up.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thenervemann
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2018
🚨︎ report
Want to hear a joke about Usain Bolt?

It's a long-running one.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dadjokesfordayzz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2017
🚨︎ report
How does Usain Bolt like his eggs?

Runny.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ra3ndy
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2017
🚨︎ report
Whenever my cat bolts across the room

After saying that my cat is the fastest cat he's ever seen

Dad: Look at MEWsain Bolt go!

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Colololin
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2013
🚨︎ report
I got a dog from the blacksmiths the other day, but as soon as I got him home he made a bolt for the door
πŸ‘︎ 36
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EllieGeorgia
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Usain Bolt must be a fruit.

Have you seen that mango

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AssasinButt
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2018
🚨︎ report
Who's the opposite of Usain Bolt?

You insane nut.

πŸ‘︎ 41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Teh_Slayur
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2016
🚨︎ report

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