Oops, wrong sub.
I am very very very sorry.
He needs to use the stairway to havefun
Oops, wrong sub
The teacher replied, "good but that's snot the answer I was looking for."
Not all heroes snare crepes.
4, you just never asked...
His mom ask's,"Why are you home so early?"
He answered"Because I was the only one who answered a question correctly."
Well, my son the genius.What was the question?"she continued.
"Whose the little shit that laid the tac down on my chair?"
Girlfriend: Do you think Jimmy Johns would deliver here?
Me: I think his Dad may.
GF: His Dad?
Me: Yeah, Papa John.
... but he ended up passing with flying colors
All I have to do is add a couple links.
It was the Last Shaker Assault.
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I realised I was dyslexic when I went to a toga party dressed as a goat
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I went up to the airport information desk. I said "How many airports are there in the world?"
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I hate fat girls who use the excuse "oh the camera adds 10lb" Well, stop eating cameras then.
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At the check-in desk the girl said, ''Window seat or aisle?''
l said, ''Window seat or you'll what? Are you threatening me?''
She said, ''No, calm down. Window seat or aisle?''
l said, ''l'll have a seat.''
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When you eat a lot of spicy food, you can lose your taste. When I was in Mexico last summer, I was listening to a lot of Michael Bolton.
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A lady with a clipboard stopped me in the street the other day. She said: "Can you spare a few minutes for cancer research?" I said: "All right, but we won't get much done"
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Did you know you're ten times more likely to get mugged in London than New York City? Thats because you don't live in New York City.
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Swimming is good for you, especially if you're drowning. Not only do you get a cardiovascular workout but also you don't die.
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British scientists have demonstrated that cigarettes can harm your children. Fair enough. Use an ashtray.
No <Body>
I was at the cash register, and a guy placed his order. At the end, he asked for "a glass of water." That is, a big cup instead of a little cup. I said, "I'm sorry, I can't do that. I can give you a laminated paper of water, though."
He thought it was funny, but he did a great job of hiding it.
interviewer: when's a good time to get married?
kid: in the afternoon
