My daughter told me Jim Morrison is overrated.
I told her not to slam The Doors in my house.
Jim Is Beaming
https://preview.redd.it/d2i4dah2m1n61.jpg?width=666&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b84aeae364e9c47dd649628fc5c66a40bdc08b7d
Jim Morrison was standing in front of the television as a child, blocking his father's view of the game.
His father shouted, "Jim! You make a better Door than a window!"
Jim Carrey is combining the movies where he plays God and a pet detective
why did Jim Band shit the bed???
After a heated argument, my kid shouted “Jim Morrison was overrated”
Me: What did I say about slamming The Doors?
At this year's graduation cermony @ UCLA, James Hetfield will receive the Jim Henson memorial degree...
...he will finally get his Masters of Puppets. 🤘
My son was trash talking Jim Morrison, so I sent him to his room.
Nobody slams the Doors in my house
I call my toilet the jim instead of the john
That way I can tell people I go to the jim every morning.
I met a man named Jim Apple the other day.
He has trouble introducing himself in France.
What did Kermit the frog say at Jim Henson’s funeral?
Jim Carey would be a very good worker at a clock factory.
He could just sit around all day making faces.
A comic series my friend is making about a mustachioed private detective, Jim Velvet and his bumbling partner Humphrey
I call my kettle Jim Carey.
Because he brews-all-my-tea.
I call my kettle Jim Carrey.
Because it brews all my tea.
Hi Jim you still with Atari
A Jim Beam warehouse caught fire, destroying 40,000 barrels of bourbon. Warehouse workers were reported to be in "low spirits."
Seriously though, terrible loss.
My son just called me Jim. I said, “That’s a bit presumptuous. Call me Dad.”
He said, “Now who is being presumptuous?”
"Jim Morrison was overrated!" the son screams as he stomps upstairs...
... his dad calls angrily after him: "YOUNG MAN, WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT SLAMMING THE DOORS?!"
If someone writes a biography about American Defense Secretary Jim Mattis they should call it...
My coworker Jim sits next to another coworker, Collin. One day, Jim replaced the nametag on his cubicle to also say Collin
I asked him, "Jim, your name isn't Collin. What's going on?"
He replied, "We're trying to Collin-ize the area."
(True story)
You guys hear about the latest batch of Jim Beam? I've been told it's pretty lit.
If Metallica went to the Jim Henson school of Arts and Media...
Would they graduate with a Master of Puppets?
(Kudos to my brother for this one.)
Two rivaling rappers, named Jim and Tom planned to meet up for a rap battle. Jim totally destroyed his rival.
Tom's fans didn't expect this kind of diss appointment.
After a successful face transplant, Jim decided to celebrate with friends at a bar...
The bartender asks, "Hey Jim, why the wrong face?"
Jim was riding his bike with his friend Bill when he hit a pothole and flew over his handlebars...
He was badly injured, and yelled to his friend, "Quick! Call me a doctor!"
Bill said, "I don't really see how that will help, but if you insist: 'You're a doctor!'"
All my kids must hate Jim Morrison.
I hear them slamming The Doors all day.
Jim Jones was the best boxer in history.
He knocked out 909 people with one punch.
“GO TO YOUR ROOM!” I told my kid. She ran into her room and shored back at me “JUST FYI, JIM MORRISON IS OVERRATED!”
She’s so grounded. I’ve warned her repeatedly about slamming The Doors in this house!
Edit: shored= shouted obviously, damn fat fingers
Why did Jim Morrison get fired from Microsoft?
He made a better Door than a Window
My son tried to convince me that Jim Morrison was just an overrated drunk, so I angrily sent him to his room...
Nobody slams the Doors in my house!!
My son told me that Jim Morrison was over-rated
so I sent him to his room because nobody slams the Doors in my house!!
People wonder why I call my toilet “the Jim” instead of “the John.”
I do it so I can say “I go to the Jim first thing every morning.”
My son said Jim Morrison was overrated.
I yelled at him for slamming the doors.
Instead of calling it the John, I call my bathroom the Jim.
That way I can say I go to the Jim every single day.
What did Kermit say when Jim Henson died?
You know why I call my toilet jim instead of john.
So I can tell people I went to the gym before work.
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