If you slap Dwayne Johnsons butt
You officially hit rock bottom
π︎ 10k
π
︎ May 14 2021
Why did Eminem prefer the Johnson & Johnson vaccine?
π︎ 9k
π
︎ Mar 21 2021
The mighty Dwayne Johnson!
π︎ 5k
π
︎ Feb 19 2021
Dwayne Johnson is a master of origami...
As his apprentice, I once assisted him at an exhibition and managed to lose the cutting implement he uses to prepare the paper for folding. I canβt believe I lost The Rockβs Paper Scissors.
π︎ 83
π
︎ May 14 2021
How much does Dwayne Johnson weigh?
π︎ 16
π
︎ May 05 2021
Why did Dwayne Johnsonβs family get tested for covid?
They couldnβt smell what the rock was cooking
π︎ 86
π
︎ Apr 01 2021
I hit Dwayne Johnson with a magazine
π︎ 86
π
︎ Mar 01 2021
Aww man. Did you hear that Johnson and Johnson messed up the their vaccine?
Well at least they took a stab at it.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Apr 01 2021
Heard they are calling that Johnson and Johnson vaccine β8 mileβ
Because you only get one shot.
π︎ 123
π
︎ Feb 02 2021
Johnson&Johnson just announced that M&M will be the spokesman for their new Covid vaccine commercial...
Cuz you only get one shot, do not miss your chance to go. This opportunity comes once in a lifetime.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Mar 01 2021
Dwayne "Rock Paper Scissor" Johnson
π︎ 6k
π
︎ Jun 18 2020
Dwayne Johnson paid me to clean up and organize his craft room, but sadly, I lost his scrapbook cutting tool.
I lost the Rockβs paper scissors.
π︎ 8k
π
︎ Jun 12 2020
Johnson and Johnson have announced their new vaccine
it heard its going to be called No More Tiers
π︎ 19
π
︎ Jan 29 2021
Why does rockstar, Brian Johnson go to the US capital to cool off?
Because there's an AC in DC.
(Someone improve this joke.)
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jan 02 2021
Dwayne Johnson is a really nice guy, so he always makes sure he's as close to the wall as possible...
He hates putting anyone between The Rock and a hard place.
π︎ 21
π
︎ Nov 06 2020
If Dwayne Johnson had downstairs neighbors, they would be clueless about just about everything.
You would be too if you lived under a Rock.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Nov 10 2020
Haven't got laid in so long I'm getting turned on by Dwayne Johnson's buttocks
I think I'm hitting ROCK BOTTOM
π︎ 17
π
︎ Nov 15 2020
If somebody slaps Dwayne Johnsonβs ass
Theyβre hitting rock bottom...
π︎ 27
π
︎ Sep 02 2020
Why is Dwayne Johnson's head revered by the Muslim faith?
Because it's the Dome of the Rock.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Nov 09 2020
Dwayne the Clock Johnson
π︎ 14
π
︎ Jun 19 2020
Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson showed me pictures of his kids on his phone.
He was pretty sedimental.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jun 28 2020
Dwayne the Sock Johnson
π︎ 16
π
︎ Jun 20 2020
Who do you call when Dwayne Johnson is sick?
π︎ 43
π
︎ May 02 2020
Do you think anyone has ever slapped Dwayne Johnson on the butt and then proclaimed, "well I've hit rock bottom"
Edit: get consent people
"Mr. Rock, may I slap your behind for the sake of an amazing pun that the people will remember for years to come"
π︎ 17k
π
︎ Apr 11 2018
The XFL was just sold to Dwayne Johnson and a couple of investors for $15 million...
..now that's a Rock bought 'em price.
π︎ 25
π
︎ Aug 07 2020
I see Sky News saying this whole Boris Johnson thing is unpresidented...
donβt they mean unprimeministered ?
π︎ 6
π
︎ Apr 07 2020
Dwayne "the Lock" Johnson
π︎ 12
π
︎ May 31 2020
Gain The Rock Johnson
π︎ 4
π
︎ Jun 16 2020
What do you call it when Dwayne Johnson buys a cutting tool?
π︎ 18
π
︎ Jul 26 2020
Yesterday I slapped Dwayne Johnson's ass.
I've officially hit rock bottom.
π︎ 966
π
︎ Aug 22 2019
Why didnβt Dwayne Johnsonβs downstairs neighbor recognize him?
Because heβs been living under a rock.
π︎ 346
π
︎ Dec 14 2019
Detective Johnson and detective Smith were investigating a murder that occurred next to a playground. The only witnesses to the murder were four children, a brother age 3 and sister age 4, and a different brother (age 7) and sister (age 8).
The children all lived in a nearby apartment complex. The younger siblings lived in apartment 8D and the older ones lived in apartment 9D. Detective Johnson advised Detective Smith that she probably shouldnβt bother question 8Dβs children about what they saw, since theyβre too young to have a reliable memory. He believed that Smith would have a better chance of getting good information from the older children, since only 9Dβs kids will remember.
π︎ 383
π
︎ Sep 04 2019
Johnson stone
π︎ 15
π
︎ Nov 18 2019
Just caught my son spanking a cardboard cutout of Dwayne Johnson.
Heβs officially hit Rock bottom.
π︎ 67
π
︎ Dec 06 2019
Dwayne βthe rockβ Johnson
π︎ 11
π
︎ Sep 02 2019
I was queuing up to get into the supermarket yesterday. Dwayne Johnson was in front of me. Behind me was a fish holding the trolley above his head!
I was between The Rock and a hard Plaice
π︎ 7
π
︎ Apr 10 2020
Dwayne "The Croc" Johnson
π︎ 12
π
︎ Dec 02 2019
Dwayne "The Hawk" Johnson
π︎ 8
π
︎ Dec 06 2019
I thought I saw Dwayne Johnson.
But it turns out it was a Shamrock.
π︎ 16
π
︎ Feb 12 2020
Why did Dwayne βThe Rockβ Johnsonβs family get tested for COVID-19
They couldnβt smell what the rock was cooking.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Apr 01 2021
If Dwayne Johnson gets covid...
can he still smell what the rock is cooking?
π︎ 7
π
︎ Feb 16 2021
All of you are Dwayne Johnson
π︎ 6
π
︎ Feb 13 2021
Wait, if you slap Dwayne Johnsonβs butt
π︎ 33
π
︎ Nov 27 2020
How did Dwayne Johnsonβs family find out that they had Covid?
They couldnβt smell what The Rock was cooking.
π︎ 44
π
︎ Sep 05 2020
How did Dwayne Johnsonβs daughter know she had COVID?
Because she couldnβt smell what the rock was cooking!
π︎ 2
π
︎ Sep 08 2020
I slapped Dwayne Johnsonβs ass.
I then realized I had hit the rock bottom.
π︎ 3k
π
︎ Aug 06 2018
Anyone who slaps Dwayne Johnson's ass
Has really hit rock bottom.
π︎ 2k
π
︎ Jul 23 2018
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
