If you slap Dwayne Johnsons butt

You officially hit rock bottom

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/joeytherealking
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did Eminem prefer the Johnson & Johnson vaccine?

you only get one shot

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ways_and_means
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2021
🚨︎ report
The mighty Dwayne Johnson!
πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AmanMegha2909
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2021
🚨︎ report
Dwayne Johnson is a master of origami...

As his apprentice, I once assisted him at an exhibition and managed to lose the cutting implement he uses to prepare the paper for folding. I can’t believe I lost The Rock’s Paper Scissors.

πŸ‘︎ 83
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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2021
🚨︎ report
How much does Dwayne Johnson weigh?

1 stone

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DarkPheonyx
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did Dwayne Johnson’s family get tested for covid?

They couldn’t smell what the rock was cooking

πŸ‘︎ 86
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OwenJthomas89
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2021
🚨︎ report
I hit Dwayne Johnson with a magazine

It nearly killed him.

πŸ‘︎ 86
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kesavadh
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Aww man. Did you hear that Johnson and Johnson messed up the their vaccine?

Well at least they took a stab at it.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gherkinstein
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Heard they are calling that Johnson and Johnson vaccine β€œ8 mile”

Because you only get one shot.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/El_cptan
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2021
🚨︎ report
Johnson&Johnson just announced that M&M will be the spokesman for their new Covid vaccine commercial...

Cuz you only get one shot, do not miss your chance to go. This opportunity comes once in a lifetime.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Dwayne "Rock Paper Scissor" Johnson
πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Punyae3671
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Dwayne Johnson paid me to clean up and organize his craft room, but sadly, I lost his scrapbook cutting tool.

I lost the Rock’s paper scissors.

πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dasbett311
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Johnson and Johnson have announced their new vaccine

it heard its going to be called No More Tiers

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SkullduggeryUK
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
🚨︎ report
Why does rockstar, Brian Johnson go to the US capital to cool off?

Because there's an AC in DC.

(Someone improve this joke.)

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/turn_ncough
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2021
🚨︎ report
Dwayne Johnson is a really nice guy, so he always makes sure he's as close to the wall as possible...

He hates putting anyone between The Rock and a hard place.

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/curioushom
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
🚨︎ report
If Dwayne Johnson had downstairs neighbors, they would be clueless about just about everything.

You would be too if you lived under a Rock.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_houser
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Haven't got laid in so long I'm getting turned on by Dwayne Johnson's buttocks

I think I'm hitting ROCK BOTTOM

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/d7my_d7oom
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
🚨︎ report
If somebody slaps Dwayne Johnson’s ass

They’re hitting rock bottom...

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/viviverma
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Why is Dwayne Johnson's head revered by the Muslim faith?

Because it's the Dome of the Rock.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spudquake
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Dwayne the Clock Johnson
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Evansonly
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson showed me pictures of his kids on his phone.

He was pretty sedimental.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SwimmingNaked
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Dwayne the Sock Johnson
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/awesome5ftw
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Who do you call when Dwayne Johnson is sick?

A Geologist

πŸ‘︎ 43
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GJuztice
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Do you think anyone has ever slapped Dwayne Johnson on the butt and then proclaimed, "well I've hit rock bottom"

Edit: get consent people

"Mr. Rock, may I slap your behind for the sake of an amazing pun that the people will remember for years to come"

πŸ‘︎ 17k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/asbestos_fingers
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2018
🚨︎ report
The XFL was just sold to Dwayne Johnson and a couple of investors for $15 million...

..now that's a Rock bought 'em price.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I see Sky News saying this whole Boris Johnson thing is unpresidented...

don’t they mean unprimeministered ?

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2020
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Dwayne "the Lock" Johnson
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πŸ‘€︎ u/peepeebigg
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2020
🚨︎ report
Gain The Rock Johnson
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DunkieMcBuckets
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call it when Dwayne Johnson buys a cutting tool?

Rock pay-for scissors

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Diny_Tick1
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Yesterday I slapped Dwayne Johnson's ass.

I've officially hit rock bottom.

πŸ‘︎ 966
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πŸ‘€︎ u/simplyGagi
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Why didn’t Dwayne Johnson’s downstairs neighbor recognize him?

Because he’s been living under a rock.

πŸ‘︎ 346
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πŸ‘€︎ u/achafrankiee
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Detective Johnson and detective Smith were investigating a murder that occurred next to a playground. The only witnesses to the murder were four children, a brother age 3 and sister age 4, and a different brother (age 7) and sister (age 8).

The children all lived in a nearby apartment complex. The younger siblings lived in apartment 8D and the older ones lived in apartment 9D. Detective Johnson advised Detective Smith that she probably shouldn’t bother question 8D’s children about what they saw, since they’re too young to have a reliable memory. He believed that Smith would have a better chance of getting good information from the older children, since only 9D’s kids will remember.

πŸ‘︎ 383
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
🚨︎ report
Johnson stone
πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ankit2020
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Just caught my son spanking a cardboard cutout of Dwayne Johnson.

He’s officially hit Rock bottom.

πŸ‘︎ 67
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πŸ‘€︎ u/alliedcola
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2019
🚨︎ report
Dwayne β€œthe rock” Johnson
πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ascoolas77
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2019
🚨︎ report
I was queuing up to get into the supermarket yesterday. Dwayne Johnson was in front of me. Behind me was a fish holding the trolley above his head!

I was between The Rock and a hard Plaice

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cyryoonake
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Dwayne "The Croc" Johnson
πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheShivanKing
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Dwayne "The Hawk" Johnson
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheShivanKing
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2019
🚨︎ report
I thought I saw Dwayne Johnson.

But it turns out it was a Shamrock.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheRockingDead
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did Dwayne β€˜The Rock’ Johnson’s family get tested for COVID-19

They couldn’t smell what the rock was cooking.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/potato_fish12
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2021
🚨︎ report
If Dwayne Johnson gets covid...

can he still smell what the rock is cooking?

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/d3admanwalking98
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2021
🚨︎ report
All of you are Dwayne Johnson

You all Rock

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LordCinko
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2021
🚨︎ report
Wait, if you slap Dwayne Johnson’s butt

Do you hit Rock Bottom?

πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kyle9490
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
🚨︎ report
How did Dwayne Johnson’s family find out that they had Covid?

They couldn’t smell what The Rock was cooking.

πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2020
🚨︎ report
How did Dwayne Johnson’s daughter know she had COVID?

Because she couldn’t smell what the rock was cooking!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Green-Chair
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
🚨︎ report
I slapped Dwayne Johnson’s ass.

I then realized I had hit the rock bottom.

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lum1nar
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2018
🚨︎ report
Anyone who slaps Dwayne Johnson's ass

Has really hit rock bottom.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/trailerthrash
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2018
🚨︎ report

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