I was walking down a pier and saw someone fishing for halibut.

My brother: why was he fishing............for the halibut!

I am dead

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bobdoodlesmerf
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2019
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For the Halibut
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madbear84
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2018
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Sometimes I go fishing just for the halibut
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πŸ‘€︎ u/brodcasting
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2017
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Grilled Halibut

I stopped by my parents house for dinner - Mom: I picked up Halibut at Costco Dad: I'm gunna marinate it and grill just for the Halibut!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mynameisktb
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2016
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What was the fish’s reason for doing things?

Just for the halibut.

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 12
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I get asked all the time why I enjoy fishing

I tell them, "just for the halibut"

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 05
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If the earth was flat and fish swam over the edge, where would they go?

Trouter space

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mnb1114
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11
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A blind person was eating seafood

It didn’t help.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nom_nom44
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2019
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Why did the bear go to down to the river?

Just for the halibut.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ktrcoyote
πŸ“…︎ May 02
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I like to tell fish jokes to my kids. When they ask why, I tell them, "It's...

just for the halibut."

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Myusernameisfish
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15
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Hey Dad why do you go to that particular place to eat fish and chips?

Just for the Halibut

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Phroedrick
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12
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I was pretty hungry so I decided to go fishing...

You know, just for the halibut...

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DanGlerrBOY89
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2019
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Saw this at my local Tookies
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Firedog26
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2019
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Why did the fisherman go to the market

Why did the fisherman go to the market?

For the halibut.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tydorstus
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2019
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Why did the fisherman cross the road?

Just for the Halibut

πŸ‘︎ 50
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Golden5StarMan
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2019
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nothing to add to this except enjoy !
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ordinarybloke1963
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2018
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Why’d the Banker marry the Mermaid?

She had good Fin&shells

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GEEZusChristman
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2019
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Do dolphins ever do anything by accident?

No. They only do it on porpoise.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mattybbeebee69
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2019
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Why did the fisherman plan a trip to Alaska?

For the halibut!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/twowhlr
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2019
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I asked my dad why he goes fishing all the time

"Just for the halibut"

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/blob6
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2016
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if you can think of a better fish pun

let minnow.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SoNotCool
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2016
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How’s fish sound for dinner?

Let’s try it just for the halibut.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Optimomanic
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2019
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Kids just don’t appreciate dad jokes.

12 year old’s fishing on a video game. I asked if he was fishing for something specific. He said no. I said β€œSo you’re just fishing for the halibut?”

He just shook his head sadly. Kid doesn’t know what he’s missing. I’m freaking hilarious!

Follow up: I told him I was heartbroken that he didn’t like my joke. He said it was too cheesy. I said it may be fishy but it certainly wasn’t cheesy.

Sometimes it’s mom that has the best dad joke.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tinkchen1
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2018
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Every damn time . . .

Whenever my mom would make waffles...

Dad: "You know at times like these I sure am glad for the letter W, cause without it these would be simply awful.

Its the longest standing tradition in my family, going on 20 years....

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TURK3Y
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2013
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I'm making a variety of fish. I'll use the same glaze for most of 'em.

But I'm making a sauce just for the halibut.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HumanAsFarAsIKnow
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2018
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So I decided to go fishing

I just went for the halibut

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/killadude666
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2019
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My dad just told me this one:

I want to try seafood just for the halibut.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mrlubster
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2019
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I went deep-sea fishing yesterday

Just for the halibut

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πŸ‘€︎ u/caffeine_bos
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2019
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My dadjoke backfired...

So my friend was wearing a fish patterned shirt.

Me: "Hey, nice shirt." Him: "Thanks?" Me: "I'm guessing you're wearing it because you think you're such a great catch." Him: sigh "No, I'm just wearing it for the halibut"

πŸ‘︎ 430
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SombreroLama
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2014
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A man in the hospital died because he ate raw fish...

When he was asked why he ate the fish, he said he did it β€œJust for the halibut.”

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fire_Wires
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2018
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Why did the man run into the fresh fish market?

Just for the halibut.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HoganB_Gogan
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2018
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I took my son out fishing today...

He said, "Dad, the fish just aint biting here, can't we go out a little further?"

I looked sternly at him and responded, "Son, catching fish in deep waters is eel-advised."

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2017
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My brother in-law an I are going fishing tomorrow morning and my daughter asked what we are fishing for.

I told her, "just for the halibut (hell of it)"

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2018
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What happens when small fish get too old to lay eggs?

They go through minnow-pause.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bigfoothobbit
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2017
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The fisherman did his job like a badass

He did it just for the halibut

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2018
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Your Best Animal Puns!!!

Let's see what you can doe...

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PaladinNerd
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2012
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A lot of people like fishing because it’s relaxing.

I like fishing just for the halibut Β―_(ツ)_/Β―

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2018
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It's so sad that aquarium is having financial troubles...

Some might say its floundering

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sendtobo
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2013
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Hey dad, why do you go fishing all of the time?

"Just for the halibut"

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/blob6
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2017
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Like sex on a dolphin

Coworker to me: "Did you mean to do that?" Me: "Like having sex on top of a dolphin." Coworker: "WTF?" Me: "You know, I did it on porpoise."

Crickets.

Edit: My son is only 4 so I'll be saving this one for when hes a little older Edit:Edit: Yes I know a dolphin isnt a porpoise. You obviously got the joke to point that out, it has innacuracies and bad puns yet you get it. Double groan which is the goal of a dad joke. First post ever and I hate you Reddit for not recognizing my dad joke original brilliance. Yeah I might rage quit dad jokes on my first post ever which is about sex on a dolphin .

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mover_guy
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2015
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Why did the fish cross the road?

For the halibut.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cayce_leighann
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2017
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Why did the fishmonger cross the road?

Just for the halibut.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ“…︎ May 14 2017
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A fish store near me was robbed yesterday

They caught the guy. When he was asked why he did it, he told the cops that it was "just for the halibut."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dedtired
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2016
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Why did the spontaneous man go fishing?

For the halibut!

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2016
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Why did the pelican visit Alaska?

For the halibut.

πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bambu002
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2013
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A Fishy Tale.

Salmon once told me that if you can carry a tuna you can be a star - fish aside, it's best not to have a weight and sea approach. Start to give a carp about your jib, carefullly line up your ducks in a roe and when the opportunity comes you'll be reeling! Always remember to never do anything just for the Halibut!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/turddicken
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2015
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Brother Going Fishing - Enter The Pun

Setup: Sadly this joke was not said by my dad it was said by me. I'm only 18 and I have always been the one in my family to say all the corny jokes.

Anyways my brother was about to leave to go fishing and was talking to my dad and I about what he would bring home if he caught anything. After listing a couple of fish I said "You might as well bring home whatever, just for the halibut."

Then I get "that look" from both my dad and brother. My dad did start to laugh then, but I could hear his disappointment in me.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2015
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Dad got me hook, line, and sinker.

My dad owns a small garden supply store. Today, he got a new shipment in, and as I was helping him unpack the boxes, I pulled out a couple fishing rods, which he's never stocked before.

Me: You gonna start selling fishing gear?

Dad: Yup.

Me: How come?

Dad: Just for the Halibut.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/graffitizoo
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2014
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My dads joke on going fishing in Alaska this summer.

We're going just for the Halibut!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mitchec90
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2014
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He said to the waiter, "i think I'll have the fish tonight"

You know. Just for the halibut.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/A_complete_idiot
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2013
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What was the Ariel's motive for the murder of Eric?

She didn't have one- she just did it for the Halibut.

(Thought of that one while vacuuming listening to the Disney Pandora station, because that's what adults do)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RenlyIsTheFury
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2014
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Got my coworkers real good.

So I work in a kitchen and was busy selling the first special of the night. While cooking it I needed a key ingredient, that's when I landed the best dadjoke of the week.

Everyone was talking so I shouted "I don't have thyme for this!!!". When asked why I was yelling I said it was for the halibut.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jameswg
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2014
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So today I bought some fish...

I recently joined a CSF - a community supported fishery. Once a week, I'll pick up a filet of freshly-caught salmon, a bag of shellfish, or other such delights from the Pacific Ocean and bring it home to my darling wife and children to much joy (or anguish, depending on who you're asking.)

You get to choose your pick-up spot, and I chose a location close to my office, so I could swing by on the way home; it's a nautical-themed bar, appropriate for such a business transaction. "Go to the bartender and ask for the fish", say the instructions; so I did, and he handed me the catch of the day. Gleaming white filets, glorious they were. Then I met a friend of mine, and after chatting for a little while, I went home.

"Jack," says my wife, "what took you so long? You should have been home an hour ago!"

"Sorry," I said. "I stopped by the bar, just for the halibut."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ajacksified
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2014
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Tarter sauce

We're eating fish at dinner and my dad said I'm going to put some of this tarter sauce on here just for the halibut

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jesseb9321
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2015
🚨︎ report
Got home late, Dad invited me to dinner

"Your mother and I are really looking forward to the vegetables, but if want to join us just for the halibut, you certainly can."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Vonkilington
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2014
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I hope you're proud of yourself Dad

My little brother was fascinated by the picture of the 466 lb flounder that has been going around lately and I told him my dad would be interested. Little bro: "Look at how big this fish is dad!" Pops: "That is an absolute shame, you shouldn't be supporting that." Little bro: "Why? Are they not going to eat it?" Pops: "No. They do it just for the halibut." Me: [audible sigh]

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πŸ‘€︎ u/johnfuckindenver
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2014
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My dad said his first dad-joke ever

So we are eating some salmon for dinner and we start talking about fishing when my dad says "most people go fishing for the halibut" (as in for the hell of it). It's a new dawn for him.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wee_littlegaffer
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2015
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Little one got me good this morning

me: "Well, you should give it another chance. Halibut is really good!"

her: "I might just try that, you know, for the Halibut!"

So it begins.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MorganFreeman4
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2014
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Dad's go to joke in our rural town.

Why did the farmer go fishing?

Oh, just for the halibut.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/occupyredrobin
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2013
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My dad was ordering music for me online...

I had a church service that I needed to order the music for. I was explaining to my dad just what needed to be ordered. I play Trombone, and naturally needed music in Bass Clef. So he asks me about the clef and I told him I needed Bass Clef.

He goes..."You sure you don't need Trout or Halibut clef?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wilkes-kun
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2015
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Since we're on fish puns...

We took a plastic fish to a marching rehearsal at my university last year. Afterwards, we proceeded to have a conversation that was one pun after another.

"Fish. That is all."

"Just for the halibut."

"Oh for the love of cod, can we not bring this here?"

"Seriously, I will krill every last one of you."

"I'm not squidding with you guys. This scampi happening any more."

"Sorry. I couldn't resist the oppor-tuna-ty."

"You're floundering."

"Why, pollocks! I'm just getting started!"

"Don't worry. His shark is worse than his bite."

"Don't trout my pun ability."

"'Pun ability' my bass! You wouldn't know a fish joke if it sprat you in the eye!"

"I might need to go see a sturgeon. These jokes are killing me."

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jaws9182
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2014
🚨︎ report
In the supermarket...

We pass by the fish aisle and see a big fish. Dad says, "Hey, we should buy that just for the halibut!"

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/somelittlebasterd
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2014
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We went to a fancy seafood restaurant for my dad's "double nickel" birthday.

When asked what he would be having he casually answered "I think I'll try the halibut. Just for the hell of it."

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2014
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This one was new..

Sister complaining about the woman she was stuck behind in line at the grocery store: "Why would she need 30 lbs of fish???"

Dad: "for the halibut"

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bdiap
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2013
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Dadjoked by the wife..

While out at our anniversary dinner tonight, my wife and I were trying a Halibut plate that had a lot of things neither of us had ever tried before, a lot of which looked rather strange. Just as we were getting ready to start eating she says, "I'm just gonna do it for the halibut."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jacksonator5000
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2014
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My Dadbdropped this at lunch today. The special was fish.

"What did the fish say after the chef chopped off it's tail?"

"What dad?"

"He said, Call a Sturgeon! "

"Heh"

"Oh come on, you can laugh at least for the halibut"

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/geddycorn86
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2014
🚨︎ report
"Dad, why are we having fish for dinner?"

Just for the Halibut.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Blockparty2345
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2014
🚨︎ report

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