What is grey, has four legs, howls at the moon, and eats cement?

A wolf...

I just added the cement to make it hard.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Godzilla_KOM
πŸ“…︎ May 17
🚨︎ report
What’s big, grey, and asks a lot of questions?

A Why-noceros

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/geoswede
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09
🚨︎ report
I was out on a safari when i saw this big, fat, grey animal limping painfully toward a muddy pond. I asked the tour guide if it was injured...

He said, "No, it's just a hip-hurt-potamus"

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pthelynese
πŸ“…︎ May 05
🚨︎ report
A curious child asked her mom, "why are you starting to get some grey hairs in with all your dark hair?"

Seizing this as a moral teaching moment she tells her daughter this little white lie, "Well young lady, when a daughter does something naughty, one of her mother's hairs turns grey."

After several moments of deep thought her daughter says to her mother, "So, mommy is that why all of grandma's hair is grey????"

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lodiman77
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08
🚨︎ report
I tried Earl grey today

It wasn’t my cup of tea

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/King_of_nerds77
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12
🚨︎ report
Greys of Thunder.
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/awesome_smokey
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07
🚨︎ report
What's grey and powdery?

Instant elephant mix.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jollyflyingcactus
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19
🚨︎ report
My friend always told me to try different types of tea instead of drinking only Earl Grey.

He was right all oolong.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jakwag1019
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Asked my kids this morning to bring their laundry and separate it into whites and colors. My son holds up some grey sweats and asks which pile.

My response: Not sure son, that’s kind of a grey area.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
🚨︎ report
A few famous Doctors. Others include Dr. House and Dr. Meredith Grey.
πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aj_seravla
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s big and grey and doesn’t matter?

An irrelephant.

πŸ‘︎ 322
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πŸ‘€︎ u/0_IceCold_0
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Wolverine walks in on Jean Grey sneezing without covering her mouth..

...and says, "Hygiene".

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/r1pen
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Why does James Bond Have grey hair?

Because there's no time to dye!

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/19dazza97
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you say the second time you have Grey Poupon?

Dijon vu

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/uneeq33
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2020
🚨︎ report
What's yellow, grey and very dangerous?

A shark in a bowl of custard.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gabz09
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s Grey and not very heavy?

Light grey.

πŸ‘︎ 66
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CarelessBeginning
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Barber: Mr. Bond, you are turning old and grey. Would you like me to colour your hair?

Janes Bond: No thanks. Dye another day.

πŸ‘︎ 136
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2019
🚨︎ report
What's Grey And Comes In Pints?

An Elephant

;)

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HYGOZE
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2020
🚨︎ report
What's large, grey, and doesn't matter?

An irrelephant.

πŸ‘︎ 110
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2019
🚨︎ report
When Hurricane Dorian hits Florida, I'm going to check out my window for the clouds to get really grey. When they're at peak greyness I'll take a picture. That way Ill always have The Picture of Dorian Grey.
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Why doesn’t Karl Marx like Earl Grey?

Because all proper tea is theft.

πŸ‘︎ 139
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πŸ‘€︎ u/blueshran
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2019
🚨︎ report
What is Christian Grey’s favorite subreddit?

r/SubsIFellFor

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shadow_Boxer1987
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you know grey hairs are hereditary?

You get it from your kids.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ZombieMolester
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2016
🚨︎ report
I am pretty good at making an Earl Grey.

It's my special tea.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ollierwoodman
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2016
🚨︎ report
πŸ‘︎ 217
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πŸ‘€︎ u/journeyman369
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2017
🚨︎ report
Grey/gray has two spellings to tech us that things aren't just black and white.

Even the spelling is a graey area...

*Removed from showerthoughts for being too much of a dad joke, so here we are.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/selmorefl
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2019
🚨︎ report
Aging is hard. When I saw my first grey hairs...

I felt like dying.

πŸ‘︎ 375
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cross_beaux
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2017
🚨︎ report
For the longest time I thought priest's collars were grey

I guess I'm just collar blind.

Thanks Michael Scott.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/space_bartender
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2019
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend asked if i had seen her grey cardigan...

I told her i don't remember seeing her grey card the first time.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/qbande
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2019
🚨︎ report
50 Shades of Grey
πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/baudia
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2018
🚨︎ report
I have this recurring dream that E.T. tackles me, puts grey tape on my belly, and runs away.

I keep getting ab-duct-taped by aliens.

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2018
🚨︎ report
50 Shades of Grey

#4e5054, #272727, #282828, #292929, #2b2b2b, #2c2c2c, #2e2e2e, #313131, #323232, #343434, #353535, #373737, #393939, #3a3a3a, #3c3c3c, #3f3f3f, #404040, #424242, #444444, #454545, #474747, #484848, #4a4a4a, #4b4b4b, #4d4d4d, #4e4e4e, #505050, #515151, #535353, #565656, #575757, #585858, #595959, #5b5b5b, #5c5c5c, #5e5e5e, #616161, #626262, #646464, #656565, #676767, #6a6a6a, #6b6b6b, #6c6c6c, #6d6d6d, #6f6f6f, #727272, #737373, #757575, #767676, #777777, #7b7b7b, #7c7c7c, #7d7d7d, #7e7e7e, #808080, #818181, #838383, #868686, #878787, #888888, #898989, #8b8b8b, #8c8c8c, #8e8e8e, #919191, #929292, #949494, #959595, #979797, #9a9a9a, #9b9b9b, #9c9c9c, #9d9d9d, #9f9f9f, #a0a0a0, #a2a2a2, #a5a5a5, #a6a6a6, #a8a8a8, #a9a9a9, #ababab, #aeaeae, #afafaf, #b0b0b0

πŸ‘︎ 448
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ColonialDagger
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2016
🚨︎ report
(X post) I made Earl Grey perfectly today.

Right on the T as they say.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pun-isher42
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2018
🚨︎ report
Did you hear? One attendee dumped a pot of Earl Grey over another attendee's head at the apiarists' convention.

Truly, brewed tea was in the eye of the bee-holder.

πŸ‘︎ 348
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zamoose
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2017
🚨︎ report
I spy with my little eye, something grey...

Apparently my son is the ultimate dad joker, as his instant reply was my hair. Much to the amusement of his mother and brother. For me the game was over and done with... πŸ˜‚

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/b8410
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2018
🚨︎ report
β€œMr. Bond, you are turning old and grey. Do you want to colour your hair?”

Bond: No time to Dye. Dye another day.

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Barber: Mr. Bond, you are turning old and grey. Would you like me to colour your hair?

James Bond: No thanks. Dye another day.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2020
🚨︎ report
What's grey and comes in pints?

An elephant

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Patrick_L58
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Barber: Mr. Bond, you are turning old and grey. Would you like me to colour your hair?

James Bond: No thank you. Dye another day.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/simplyGagi
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2019
🚨︎ report
What's large, grey, and doesn't matter?

An irrelephant.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2019
🚨︎ report
What's large, grey, and doesn't matter?

An irrelephant.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/simplyGagi
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
🚨︎ report
What's large, grey, and doesn't matter?

An irrelephant 🐘

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/T3chJ3n
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2019
🚨︎ report
What is big, grey and not very important? .

An irrelephant

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ihasanali
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2019
🚨︎ report

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