Forged Puns

It smelt funny

It was the first known casual tea of war.

As soon as I got it home it made a bolt for the door

This raises the question: Will Will Smith Smith?

George had 2000 lbs of Laundry to do. That's a washing-ton!

I forget. :D

The whole idea of Forge of Umpires confuses me.

What do you call metal that has been forged by satan?

Hell bent

Reading Rambo.

...because as soon I got it home, it made a bolt for the door!

(Blacksmiths make bolts for doors)

Credit: Random Contestant on Forged in Fire

Told my girlfriend I had some ideas for names for our future kids.

First was Penelope for a girl, because I always liked the nickname Penny. Girlfriend thought it was cute and agreed.

Next was Dimitri because it's not too common and sounds artsy. Girlfriend was not much of a fan, but agreed it would sound good with our last name.

Last was Nicholas Levar for a son's name. Named after Santa Claus and Star Trek's Geordi La Forge. I love Christmas and my girlfriend loves Star Trek. Girlfriend shot it down.

At this point I said, "But the nicknames are good! Penny, Dime, and Nick L. We would have 16 cents to our name! It makes cents to me!"

Not sure if she wants to have kids with me now.

EDIT: To the guys saying Dime isn't a nickname for Dimitri, they're MY imaginary kids, I'll call them what I damn want.

I'm currently building a war forged bard. He has a chest that acts as a record player and his left arm is the horn. I'm need of name pun brilliance!!

He forges

Wow, that artist is really forging a head

when there was a terrible accident. The fire in his forge had gone out of control and set fire to the shop. The blacksmith nearly lost his life. He was bedridden for many months and relied on the help of his children and grandchildren to feed him, bathe him, and take care of all of his needs. Eventually he was able to get back on his feet, though his outlook on life had turned quite grim. He was now able to take care of himself, but he had lost much of his strength and dexterity from the injuries he sustained and he was unable to practice his trade. He fell into a deep depression and he spent most of his days sitting at home in front of the fireplace gazing into the flames, longing for the days when his strong hands could grasp a hammer and strike a hot piece of iron, slowly forging it into a beautiful piece of work.

One evening when the old man was sitting in front of the fire, he heard a knock at the door. It was his granddaughter, whom he hadn't seen in many months. She had overheard her father talking to her mother about how her grandfather was slowly slipping away into depression and hopelessness and she wanted to help. To the old man's surprise, she had brought him a puppy. "I thought that since you're always here all by yourself that you might want someone you keep you company," the granddaughter said. The old man's eyes welled up with tears and the little puppy instantly jumped into his arms and began licking the tears from his face. The old man and his granddaughter spent the next several hours sitting on the floor of his house watching the puppy chase around a rubber ball, bouncing, jumping, panting, and licking. In that short time, the old man had made complete turnaround from being sad, lonely, and hopeless, to smiling from ear to ear, full of joy with his new-found companion. As the hours grew late and the puppy grew tired, the granddaughter said "Well Opa, I'm glad you like your puppy, but it's late and I should be heading home. By the way, what are you going to call him?" "Life," said the old man, "because he has given me a new meaning and joy to mine." The granddaughter kissed her grandfather on the cheek, wished him goodnight, and she left.

Many years passed and all the while, the old man and his little dog were inseparable. Everywhere the old man went, Life was always with him whether it was the post office, the grocery store, and even when the old man went to the barber shop, the little dog would sit patiently until the last hair on

Context: My brother made a forge this summer and mom kept the slag from his first firing. She's using it in a x-mas ornament present for him and we can't think of anything witty to write on it. If anyone can think of a good one, we'd love to hear it!

I was getting my hair cut today and told her how I started blacksmithing this summer and made my own forge.

Barber: "Oh that's really cool!"

Me: "Actually, it's really hot!"

Barber audibly groans.

Thanks for raising me right Dad!

I was at a renaissance fair a few weekends back and there was this blacksmith putting on a forging show. At the end, he took questions from people. Someone asked "What's your favorite thing to make?" Without skipping a beat, he responded with "Babies."

He's great, as soon as I got home he made a bolt for the door.

As soon as I got him home he made a bolt for the backdoor

He forges