19 Hilarious Fists Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

What’s a fist that doesn’t hurt

A Pacifist

👍︎ 22

💬︎

👤︎ u/awesomehuder

📅︎ Jan 02 2021

🚨︎ report

Why do beginner artist always forget to draw the stick figure’s thumb when they draw a fist?

They forgot the punchline

👍︎ 2

💬︎

👤︎ u/SleepyCrow07

📅︎ Oct 27 2020

🚨︎ report

Today I took a single Cheerio from my son’s bowl, stared him in the eyes, placed it on the table, smashed it with my fist, and said “Watch out...”

“...cereal killer.”

👍︎ 11

💬︎

👤︎ u/VeryLastBison

📅︎ Oct 26 2020

🚨︎ report

Two tradies were in a drunken fist fight over who's tools are who's.

Guess they were fighting tooth and nail over it.

👍︎ 2

💬︎

👤︎ u/MrToxicDwarf

📅︎ Aug 04 2020

🚨︎ report

Son tied a fist toy to my fishing net

I dont get the punchline but he's smiling

👍︎ 5

💬︎

👤︎ u/ferkeshu

📅︎ Jun 11 2020

🚨︎ report

I got in a fist fight with some movers and won

They were terrible boxers

👍︎ 7

💬︎

👤︎ u/dubeykeebler

📅︎ Jun 25 2020

🚨︎ report

How do you beat a robot in a fist fight

Socket in the jaw

👍︎ 14

💬︎

👤︎ u/TheMightyBattleSquid

📅︎ Jan 12 2020

🚨︎ report

What did the fist plate say to the second plate?

Dinners on me Edit: sry adopt the typo

👍︎ 5

💬︎

👤︎ u/coolman965

📅︎ Nov 28 2019

🚨︎ report

My son got into a fist fight with his music teacher because he wrongly answered a question in his test. When he told me the story I just could say one thing...

"Son, violins is not the answer".

👍︎ 22

💬︎

👤︎ u/Dansowaru

📅︎ Nov 22 2019

🚨︎ report

Two friends race each other. When they both finished, they fist bumped.

I guess you could say the finish line was also the punchline.

👍︎ 4

💬︎

👤︎ u/EOattheinternet

📅︎ Dec 06 2019

🚨︎ report

What do they call fist bumps in the U.K.?

British Pounds

👍︎ 3k

💬︎

👤︎ u/Flandersmcj

📅︎ Dec 19 2016

🚨︎ report

Me: Dad, Mum, I’m gay Dad: *clenches fists* Mum: Sweetie no do-

Dad: HI GAY, IM DAD!

👍︎ 7

💬︎

👤︎ u/MidoriMonki

📅︎ Oct 06 2019

🚨︎ report

This is one my 7 year old son said to me... I had a closed fist up to my face with my little finger extended and picking food out of my teeth. My thumb was also extended out. He looked at me and with a smirk on his face said to me...

Who's on the phone dad?

👍︎ 22

💬︎

👤︎ u/Pearly351

📅︎ Mar 17 2019

🚨︎ report

My ten year old fist bumps me and does the 'exploding hand' afterwards ...

After he explodes his hand I look down at my still clenched fist. I slowly raise it near my ear confused and shake it. I then explode it in my face almost knocking me off me feet. I look at him sternly and say, "You could have killed me."

👍︎ 2k

💬︎

👤︎ u/Twisted_Logic

📅︎ Jun 25 2014

🚨︎ report

They should make a spinoff show with Misty from Luke Cage and Colleen from Iron Fist.

Call it “Knight Wing”.

*My actual dad made that joke today.

👍︎ 4

💬︎

👤︎ u/darcizzle16

📅︎ Sep 16 2018

🚨︎ report

Some days I need a whole fist of Wild Turkey.

👍︎ 45

💬︎

👤︎ u/Stretch_Aye

📅︎ Nov 26 2013

🚨︎ report

Did you know if you punch someone with a lighter clench in your fist you will do less damage to the other person.

Because it is a lighter punch.

👍︎ 4

💬︎

👤︎ u/Spartan17492

📅︎ Dec 02 2016

🚨︎ report

My dad got my mom earlier and then fist bumped me.

So my wisdom teeth have been coming in lately and my dad hit my mom with this one.

Dad: Yeah I've never had any wisdom teeth

Mom: Huh?!

Me: Some people don't get their wisdo-

Dad: ALL MY TEETH WERE STUPID TEETH!

While grinning like a maniac while my mom groaned.

👍︎ 11

💬︎

👤︎ u/Trigger_The_Dog

📅︎ Nov 15 2015

🚨︎ report

Earned a fist bump for this one.

Went to McDonald's with some fellow students after TAFE was finished for the day (for those who don't know what TAFE is, I guess the most similar thing would be community college?), and somehow one of the girls ended getting crumbs on her hat: "How did they get there?!" "I guess it's just a crummy hat."

👍︎ 5

💬︎

👤︎ u/Clarrington

📅︎ Aug 05 2014

🚨︎ report